I Lost My Beautiful Ginger Options

[cindyp]

I found this forum out of grief and disbelief of losing our beloved German Shepherd, Ginger. She was the happiest, prettiest soul I had ever met. She was the protector of our other 2 dogs and our children (especially our youngest son who is 8). I couldn't sleep at all because I didn't want to re-awaken to this nightmare. So I tossed and turned all night.

I realized a large problem I have is that I don't know what to think of. I am trying not to think of the last horrible few days when the disease viciously and mercilessly reared its ugly head. But when I think of her, I see how happy she was and how much she loved life. She danced at the waters edge of the lake which only had to be there to make her happy. She danced in circles just to see you walk in the door. She brought her toys to show so we would tell her how cute they were and she would deliberately walk under the table so the cloth would drape her head and we would all tell her what a pretty girl she was. And thinking of this makes me cry so hard I don't think I will ever stop. My children cry with me and I tell them it is okay to let it out. But I have to hide to cry more. Tonight will be unbearable to go to bed without her at our feet. My husband works away during the week and she made us feel safe. (She was a beautiful, sweet soul and made herself very scary when unknowns were outside or close by.)

So what should I think of to stop crying? My heart is broken and things will never be the same without her. I really want to know that she is happy where she is. I guess it hurts knowing how much she loved this earth and all of the sudden she is not here. She was too young to leave. That part hurts just as much as missing her. Please give me any suggestions of what I should be thinking of to stop crying. If anyone knows in their heart for some reason that our beloved animal family-members are happy once they've crossed over, please let me know. I just need comfort. Thank you and thank you for this forum.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Cindy, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Not being able to look at your beloved Ginger's pictures yet is very normal, for right now they are yet another blatant reminder that your beloved Ginger is no longer physically with you. It's okay to wait to do a memorial until YOU are ready to decide what you want to do, Cindy. So, please do NOT feel guilty about this. Remember - - this is YOUR grief journey to be traveled in YOUR own time and in YOUR own way.

Clinical professionals highly recommend that people who are experiencing high stress situations find ways to take unnecessary stress off, and I'm so glad you are finding ways to do this - - like not forcing yourself to do housework in the way you would probably normally do it.

And it's perfectly normal for you to feel like NOT cleaning - - for your feelings of not wanting to clean Ginger away. When you come across her fur as you clean, you can pick it up and put it in a zip lock baggie. This is what I have done, and many others, and it's one of the ways we can keep our beloved companions with us.

"I rubbed it on my cheek and cried because I will never touch her softness again. I will never get kisses or hugs ever again."

Cindy, saving your beloved Ginger's fur will be of comfort to you, so that you can feel her fur whenever you need to. Yes, unfortunately one of the many difficult adjustments in this grief journey is not having the blessing of our beloved companion's physical kisses and hugs. BUT - - you WILL have them again - - when it is your appropriate time to join your beloved Ginger in eternal joy. And I promise you, Cindy, you WILL BE reunited with her for all eternity.

For now, though, you are faced with the enormous task of continuing to live your earthly journey in a way that honor the eternal love you share with your beloved Ginger. It's an ENORMOUS adjustment, and it is one that you will always have the support and encouragement of each of us here in your journey. I promise you, Cindy, you will endure this - - it just takes time.

Thank you so very much for sharing your beloved Ginger with us, Cindy. I hope you and your family will have a very peaceful evening. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam