Goodbye, Jet. Options

[Walk Alone]

Hello everybody. I am glad to find this forum. I don’t have a family or anyone else to talk to.

On August 7, 2007, I adopted an eleven-week-old kitten from an animal shelter who they called “Marty”. I was actually a volunteer at the shelter and noticed that the kitten’s eye was very infected. I called it to the attention of the staff on several occasions. After it remained untreated for over a week, I adopted him and took him to one of my own veterinarians, who is especially good with eyes. I renamed the kitten “Jet”.

My veterinarian initially thought Jet’s eye had already ruptured. After they cleaned it out, they saw it had not ruptured. Jet suffered permanent damage to his tear duct, but otherwise fully recovered.

When Jet’s eye was being treated, I would sit on the edge of the bathtub to medicate him. Anytime I sat there after the medication was done, Jet would hop up on my lap and rub his nose against my nose as if he remembered the treatments and was saying “Thank you.” He was my best friend.

On February 2, 2010, I took Jet to the veterinarian after I noticed some weight loss. Jet was diagnosed with Feline Infectious Peritonitis (FIP). Working with animals for many years, I knew that disease well. I was devastated.

I read about a veterinarian in the UK that had a 25% survival rate with FIP when using Prednisolone and Interferon. Jet and I fought hard with these medications for nine months. He was so brave and strong! Unfortunately, on November 8, 2010, I couldn’t ask him to fight anymore. We said goodbye at 6:20 p.m. at the veterinarian’s office. He died in my arms. My baby boy.

I feel absolutely terrible because when we arrived at the veterinarian for the last time, Jet hid his little face in my arm for protection, but I was the one who brought him there to die! It was me! I absolutely hate myself.

Why, oh why, was he given only three years to live? Why is there no cure for this disease? Why did he recover so well from the eye infection just to get sick again? It is not fair. Jet deserved so much more.

My grandma passed away on Christmas Eve. I asked her to please give me a sign that Jet is in heaven with her. I needed to know that animals go to heaven. This morning on the way to work, an SUV in front of me had a license plate that simply read “JETME”. I read it as “Jet is with Me.” I hope so.

[lynette]

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how much it hurts. I lost two babies within 9 months. One suddenly and the other to cancer. It was really hard. It's almost two and a half years since Lily left and a year and a half since Hunny left us. We fought cancer with Hunny. She was so brave. She lost two toes to it but we had an extra eight months with her. We had to let her go. I could see the pain in her eyes and the cancer had spread. But like everyone else I couldn't bear to let her go. But looking back at the photos of her I could really see the pain in her eyes. I don't know if it was from the pain or from the loss of her precious sister Lily. I took comfort in knowing that they are together again.

This website has been such a blessing for me. Many, many people here understand what we're all going through. I don't come here too often anymore though. I hate to admit it, but it's difficult reading about everyone else's pain when I'm still working on my own. It brings up so many sad memories.

Moon_beam writes so beautifully. I love the comforting words.

Time does help. It really does. I miss my angels so much, but I can make it through the day now without crying. I do find though that I tend to avoid certain songs and situations - just can't bear to think about it. I have four other little furbabies now and they keep my mind busy. They have helped tremendously.

This is a great place. Although it hurts so much, I would not trade one second of the time I had with my angels. Both were only eight when they left. I had tremendous guilt with Lily. She was a rescue and she was supposed to be here till she got old, but I failed her. I still struggle with that. I miss them so much.

I hope you find some help and peace through this website. And yes, there will be ups and downs. I'm not a religious person, but I sure hope I get to be with my babies when my time comes.

Take care.