Did I Make The Right Decision?, Euthanization Options

[Tinou]

This is my first visit to this forum, I think it's going to help me a lot.

I had my cat euthanised yesterday, Tinou was 11 years old. This is the first time I go throught the death of my animal. My cat has been sick for the past 4-5 days, didn't eat, drink-and my cat is a big eater. He lost about 6 pounds all of a suden-something was wrong. He was very weak and his fur started changing. Poor thing! We had to give him drops of water because he didn't want to drink. We never thought it would have been that bad, we would have brought him sooner to the vet.

The vet could not find anything wrong after examination (touch) and suggested a batterie of test and fluids to check what was wrong with him or euthanise him. After debating our options and crying our eyes out, we decided to euthanise him. I have a feeling he was sick for a month or 2 but will never know. Our cat left this world very weak and sick and I hate that he left that way. On top of that, we had left him all weekend at home not knowing it was that bad (but someone was checking him during our absence), so I feel like we didn't spend enough time with him during his last days.

The reason we choose to euthanise him over a batterie of tests was because the vet bills would have been way over our budget and we could not afford it. And the cat was suffering enough, we didn't want it to keep going on like that.

Now I regret my decision, I feel guilty. Maybe we should have went the other way and pay for all the tests-maybe he just ate something and would have been better after some medications. But, I have a feeling we would have discovered that he had something very wrong with him and this would have been useless. I think if we would have known if the cat was sick or that he had cancer or something, it would have been less hard on us, we feel like there was no reason for us to euthanise him and we did it just because we were cheap. I don't know. I take comfort in my feeling that he was sick and like the vet said, that not all cats live up to 15 years of age. Maybe it was his time.

I just find it very hard and I keep thinking that we made a decision too fast and should have thought about it more. I miss him so much. I feel so much pain, I feel like I could cry all day again today. Is this normal??????? Will this feeling go away?????? I guess time will tell...Did I make the right decision?????

Mama

[Rudy's Mom]

From what I hear this is very normal. I came to your post today because I needed to be hear today after making my last payment to a very high vet bill. It was not just the bill it was having to go to the painful place of remembering where I last saw my angel alive. You heart will never lie, you know that first feeling is usually the right one. I take solace in the thought our fury babies know what burden we can take and what we can't. You gave him the best for 11 years and he knew you loved him. And some how some way they know what we feel before we do. Maybe thats why he gave you no sign otherwise to take drastic measures. Guilt is a big part of grieving but you just try to hold on to all the memories the good and the bad. It is something you have forever. Coming to this site was a good choice. It helps! I am still a work in progress very far from where I think I should be but each experience is it of its own (different for everyone). Take all the time you need to heal. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you for I was where you are at not long ago. Be well and take care.