A Bit Worried, Not Really Bonding, with Leopold Options

[ladywolf]

I am a bit worried--I find that I am not really "bonding" with Leopold. He is SO independent that I forget to play with him and try to have bonding time--he spends most of his time outdoors, away from me. I guess the bottomline truth is, I'm just never as attached to cats as I am to dogs. I've had SO MANY of them--they have come and gone, probably twenty cats over the years--they all die young, except my last one, and even she disappeared and probably joined the food chain, but at least she was 15 years old...

So maybe I protect myself from getting too attached because of my past experiences? Or is it just that I am really more of a dog person than a cat person at heart? Or was it too soon for me to get a new pet, too soon after Ladywolf's death (a month).

Or is it that he is SO bold that he almost intimidates me? Not that I'm afraid of him, but that I perceive him as being bolder than I am, and I'm pretty bold!

Or is it that my tiny house is set up such that there is no sofa or easy chair, just the bed and the computer chair for spending comfortable time--and his forays up onto the computer desk infuriate me, so bed is really the only place that we can spend relaxed time together, which we do?

Or am I expecting too much too soon?

Maybe getting him altered will change his behavior a little; I don't know, but I hope so. He is an alpha male kitten if ever I saw one. And cute as a button--I just don't feel that I care about him as much as I cared about my dogs, and this makes me feel confused and sad. Of course, I would do anything I needed to to protect him from harm (except keep him indoors--we'd both go MAD!!!), but do I LOVE him? I'm not really sure.

Any and all input would be welcomed, as I worry about this a lot these days. I started a new thread so that it would get more attention.

Thanks in advance!

Hugs from Margi, Spiritwolf, and Leopold The King of The Universe

[ladywolf]

I'm having a really down day. Writing about Ladywolf really set me off--I've fallen into a depression today. Not that I have anything to be depressed about, just: Ladywolf, being still unemployed, having no, read, NO money at all, having to tell the landlord today that I still couldn't pay the August rent, having my alleged boyfriend in CA. take off today on a spur-of-the-moment trip to Yellowstone with his "traveling companion" Donna, whom I've never heard of before, having 13 more tooth extractions to look forward to and no money for dentures (I have another appt. on Monday, with a different dentist this time!!!), the weather, my best friend being out of town, etc.

No, no reason at all why I should feel depressed, whaddya' think? Oh yeah, I just tried to register for a depression chatroom and they presented me with a complicated algebraic algorithm to solve before I could register (this is for REAL), so, needless to say, I let THAT one go! So I've got no one to talk to.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Margi