Conflicting Emotions Options

[My heart Cooper]

We brought home our new puppy yesterday. Her name is Dori and we are absolutely in love with her. It's so strange to me because I'm very happy with her, yet I miss Cooper so much. It's kind of like I'm starting to feel normal again but that makes me sad because I don't want my "normal" to be without Coop. I keep thinking about all the things he's missing out on. I'm so grateful for Dori. She really has brought joy back into our home. And she seems to love our other dog Rudy. I think they'll be great friends. But it's so bittersweet.

[My heart Cooper]

I'm missing my little boy so much today. The guilt is starting to rear it's ugly head again. All I can think about is I made the decision that led to his death. I chose to change his vet, chose his new vet, chose to have his teeth cleaned, didn't brush his teeth. I look at his pictures and see him doing things around the house and can't think of anything but that he is gone forever. I will never see him again. He was only five and is missing out on so much. I still feel like this isn't happening. It's a bad dream. He'll be home one day.