Starting To Freak Out, new furbaby Options

[My heart Cooper]

A couple weeks ago, my husband and I decided to get a puppy. She was only a few weeks old so we knew it would be another month before we got her, which gave us a couple months after Cooper passed. We went to see her two weekends ago. I've been very excited about it and she is so cute. But last night and today, when I think of bringing her home, I get this heavy feeling in my chest. I just feel like I'm going to freak out. I'm afraid I'm not ready for it. I had been doing ok with Coop's loss but once I hit a month, I've been having a really awful time again. I'm so confused. I do want to add a dog to the house. I think Rudy needs it, as much as we do. But I'm so unsure all of a sudden. I know it will be an adjustment, but what if I'm not ready? I've also been taking fertility meds this past week, trying to get pregnant, so I'm hoping the intense emotions I've been having out of nowhere are partially due to that and they'll calm down now that I'm done with the meds. I'm just scared I won't be able to love Dori as much as I should or as much as she deserves.

[ladywolf]

Awww, honey, I suggest trying to calm down and "go with the flow." All of your apprehensions are perfectly normal, but I think it is marvelous that you've decided to bring a new being of love into your household. Of course, she won't be Cooper--she will be her own wonderful, boisterous, puppy self, with different needs and different personality traits--and you will be new and different to her! What an opportunity--to be a puppy's first and only parents! There is such joyfulness in new puppies--I doubt that you will fail to be seduced by it.

But your fears are normal too. I don't blame you for freaking out. Please know that you are not dishonoring Cooper's memory by bringing a new one into the house. Cooper would WANT you to have someone new to love--wouldn't he?

Animals "grow on us," you know that. So even if you feel awkward around the newcomer, you will soon come to love her madly, I am sure!

I support you 100% in your choice to do this. And yes, the fertility meds may very well be playing into your feelings of doubt right now, and hopefully your whole system will settle down now. When are you supposed to bring her home?

All love to you and faith in your decision--

Margi and Spiritwolf