Cremation Fears, Please talk to me Options

[Ann H]

Cremation. I have noticed that no one talked about this subject except to say they were waiting or picking their babies ashes up. I was afraid all winter long that my Snookie would die in the winter and I would have to have her cremated. Here in Michigan the ground would be to hard to dig a grave so when spring and summer came I was relieved I could bury her body if she did pass over to the bridge.

I am thrilled that she is still with me but now with winter coming again I am terrified she will die when the ground is frozen. I can't hardly bear the thought of having her beautiful body burned and I cry every time I think of it. It makes me feel sick, really sick to my stomach and when I think about it and it makes me cry so hard.

I have not read any thoughts on having to do it against their wishes here at LS and I have read many many post. I could not contain myself any longer from asking how did anyone who had it done feel that really wanted to bury their baby instead. Did having the ashes haunt you, did you feel sick, do you have nightmares, were you able to keep them in plain sight?

My sister said it is better to cremate Snookie than to bury them because I could take her with me any where. She said if I burried her the under ground bugs and animals could get to her. I don't even know if I would be able to keep her near by in a container for fear of thinking she would hate me for closing her in or for having her body burned and destroyedthat way. But if we can't dig through the snow and ice nothing else can be done there would be no other choice and I am so stressed.

Oh help me please, somebody talk to me and tell me what it was like for you and how I can overcome this horrible fear. I don't mean to cause any of you any undue pain but I need help dealing with the idea of this subject. It hurts me so to think of destroying Snookie's body. The vet said it will cost $222.50 for a private cremation. Also how do you know you really get your own baby back?
Ann

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[Ann H]

You all have been so wonderful sharing your stories with me. I am so torn not knowing what to do. I am so afraid of cremation that I put it in my will not to have that done to me, the attorney said they have to do what is in my will. Anyway my husband says we should go with cremation and should we ever move she can go with us. It really bothered me what my sister said about the worms and moles and under ground things getting to her.

That was a wonderful idea about digging the grave and keeping the dirt somewhere so it wouldn't freeze. I don't know if my dad will go for it dad said that my husband and I are the ones who are going to get his home when he passes away. If he wont let me put her there I would have to move without her if we really do get dad's house.

Maybe I wont know until the last minute you all have been a wondeful help and thanks again for talking to me about such a delicate subject.
Ann