Losing My Beloved Misha Options

[MishasMom]

I'm so glad I found this forum. On Saturday I had to put my beloved Ragdoll Misha to sleep. It was the hardest decision to make. She was 15 years old. Last year she had been diagnosed with beggining stages of kidney failure. Last week she just started acting like she wasn't happy anymore. She was still eating but sleeping a lot. She also would be sitting there having trouble breathing. On Friday night she didn't want to be bothered at all. Didn't want me touching her, or cuddling, or any kind of interaction with me. During last week she bit me once or twice for no real reason. She had never done that before. I had this feeling she was telling me that she was done. She didn't enjoy life.

I took her into the vet Saturday morning. After talking to the vet he thought that she could of possibly had a stroke or seizures. There was also a chance that she could have a brain tumor. I asked if she was in any physical pain and he said no. I'm not sure if I believed that she had lost most of her muscle mass and I'm sure her little hips were rubbing up against bone. I just kept thinking we will be back in this same spot either ten days or a few months. What kind of quality of life would she have in that time. I feel that we don't just have an obligation to their physical pain but also their mental pain. So I made the decision I thought was best for her. She went quickly thank God. I did second guess myself the next day. I think that is normal. I do have a peace about it now. I believe we will see them again one day in heaven with our heavenly Father.

The hardest part for me is coming home to an empty apartment. I live alone and it is so lonely in my bed at night. For 30 years I have only had 4 months without a companion cat. I know I want to get another one just want the right timing.

Sorry for rambling on. My friends are getting tired of hearing about "it".

[moon_beam]

Hi, MishasMom, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the loss of your beloved Misha. Losing a beloved companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we have been blessed with the privilege of their company. Euthanasia is the last act of love we can give to our beloved companions - - at great sacrifice to ourselves - - so that they can be healed to their former youthful bodies in the healing presence of the angels.

Unfortunately it is usually the people who are closest to us who simply do not understand the trauma of losing a beloved companion. Clinical professionals now recognize that losing a beloved companion is as traumatic, if not more so, as losing a human family member or friend. Our beloved companions give to us their unconditional love and undivided attention, and we in turn surrender ourselves to them without reservation. This is one of the many reasons why losing them is both emotionally and physically painful.

I, too, am the only human resident in my home, so I do so well understand how difficult it is for you to come home to an empty house and empty arms. It is a huge adjustment to say the least, and only re-emphasizes the emptiness that is in your heart.

I am glad you are feeling better about your decision to let Misha go home to the angels. The second guessing is a normal part of the grief journey, and sometimes creeps in and out during the grieving process. This is why it is so important to hold onto the truth - - and that being that you always did the very best you could for your precious Misha at all times and in all circumstances - - including making the hardest decision for you and the best decision for her.

Misha, among many things it is very important for you to know that you are not alone in your grief journey. Each of us here do understand what you are going through and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Misha, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam