How To Savor The Time With A Dying Pet?, It's hard... Options

[ladywolf]

Hi All--

Darnnit, every time I look at Ladywolf now, I'm thinking, "she's dying, I wonder how much more time she has...?" I keep staring at her swollen back leg and wondering if it hurts her, if it's growing or shrinking, if, if, if. When I take her for a walk, I watch her movements constantly to see how much she's being affected by the tumors as she walks. I wonder how much she is missing Poppers. I feel as if I am not doing enough for her, when in fact, I am more or less dedicating my LIFE to her right now.

But there's little pleasure left in my interactions with her, because I am spending all my time with her WORRYING now! All this has happened since the vet confirmed that she has cancer--everything changed, somehow. I'm moving through all the stages of grief constantly, and don't know how to be with her in a "normal" way anymore. Does any of this make sense to you folks? I hate this. I don't want to look at my beloved beauty and see only "dying wolf." It's all making me a little insane, and very very sad.

Help, please! Thanks!

Margi and Ladywolf

[Westiesam/Sharon]

Hi Margi
Hope you and Ladywolf are doing great! I just read that post you had over on the Poem to All of us that Anna wrote--wow- I can't believe you had nine dogs in your life. Sammy was my one and only. What you said though about not getting another dog for awhile struck me too - we have decided not to get another furbaby because we're getting to that age where we're thinking of retiring and want to travel more. We devoted (lovingly and would do it again in a heartbeat) 11 years to Sammy and when I get another dog I want to be able to give it that same amount of love and attention -- and I was thinking - maybe that's what's hard about all of this too -- knowing that the house will be empty alot longer. I still hate coming home from work to the empty house -- but your post made me feel like there is hope -- it's only been a little over 5 weeks now -- but I'm hanging on to your words of wisdom and trusting that I too will heal and feel better and happy again.
Take care
Sharon