Guilt Is About The Past..., Hope is about the future! Options

[ladywolf]

We've all done things we wish we hadn't, or not done things we wish we had. This comes up especially when one is losing, or has lost, a beloved 4, 8 or 100-legged. (Hey, there have to be some millipede owners out there!)

Guilt is a waste of our precious time, but we all indulge in it. Think about this: guilt makes US feel more important. My mother committed suicide, and I couldn't believe all the people who thronged around me saying, "Oh, if only I had had lunch with her when she called," or "If only I'd gone shopping with her that day." No. Not. Never. My mother was determined to go, and nothing could have stopped her.

So think on this when you feel guilt about your beloveds--you did the BEST YOU POSSIBLY COULD HAVE under the circumstances, given what you knew at the time. Guilt usually comes from knowledge gained after the fact--but we act from knowledge known BEFORE THE FACT. You did the best you could, given what you knew at the time...period.

I'm facing the death of Poppers right now, so I'm writing this for myself as well as everyone else. I'm clear with her, even though I've been away from her for two days. We are complete, right now, as a unit...and I will have to deal with the feelings that arise when that unit no longer exists. But I never did anything WRONG! We really loved each other, and that's what counts!

Margi aka Ladywolf

[smokey/lady/max]

Thanks Margi for your so kind words. I wish I could find it in my heart to accept my decission that I made that awful day.

Anna