My Best Friend Options

[Ginger4ever]

Yesterday was the hardest day of my life. Many people will say that, after having a bad day at work/school, but it was true. It was horrible enough for the past weeks to have seen my hamster and best friend Ginger suffer, but yesterday it ended. Ginger hadn’t been doing well for a long time. She was bleeding, blind, deaf and, overall, old. However yesterday, she was paralyzed from waist down, and I knew she was in pain. I was the one who asked for my mom to take me to the vet’s to have her put down. Usually, a parent will say either “Sweetie, we think it’s best if you put him down,� or “Honey, do you want to put her down?� but no. Not with me. I was the one who asked my mom. And I’m just a kid, I’m only 11 years old. I don’t want to be the mature one. I wanted comforting, for my mom to tell me it’ll be okay, but in about two hours, we came home from the vet’s with a dead hamster to burry in the backyard. I know people here know what it’s like, but it just hurts so much. I miss Ginger. She was my best friend.

[Ginger4ever]

Thanks lynette.

I don'pt know what's been happening lately. I see something and it just sets me off. I'll do one of two thigns. One, I'll burst out in tears. It just comes without warning and scares a lot of people. Two, I'll freeze. I can't hear or really see anything. Everything's just unfocused and only physical contact shakes me from it. And that scares ME. Certain thoughts, 90% of them about Ginger.

I found a picture! It's an old picture I had on a project. I remember the first day Ginger was bleeding, I took it to school to keep me calm. I lost it, but I found it today. It's all bent and wrinkled but it's the only photo I have of her that I can find. And I always have it with me now. I don't want to let it go. I'll try to scan it later.

I was thinking about some songs that reminded me of Ginger and I mostly picked sad songs. Then I thought, Ginger wasn't a sad hampster. She was a spunky and outgoing pet and that's how I want to remember her. I know for a long time I'll think of Ginger and see death but I don't think she'd want that. At least that's not how I think she'd want me to think of her. But just for the heck of it, here are some songs that remind me of how I feel about Ginger, or what I see her as:
Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne [sad]
Tears of an Angel [sad]
Already Gone [sad]
When Your Gone [sad]
My Heart Will Go on [ sad]
Bubbly [happy]
Gives you hell [Describes Gingy]

There are so many other songs that remind me of her, but I just can't name that right now. This was basically a stupid post but I just needed to talk again. I love you Ginger baby.