How Do I Channel My Grief? Options

[debandfrankie]

Does anyone here have any hints on how to channel grief?

I'm finding it quite overwhelming, I'm a homemaker and I attend art classes 2 days a week. When I'm at home I tend to mope around crying, thinking about my dog and how much I miss him. On the days I go out to classes, I usually end up doing something else as well and before I know it, I'm exhausted.

I spent two days at home on the weekend and I probably should have gone out but I was busy with domestic chores.

It seems I'm not keeping much of a balance. Perhaps one excursion per day, and then a rest? I don't know. I just need some practical tips on getting through each day, without moping, and without getting overtired. I still wake up early thinking about Frankie. Maybe I should see a counsellor or something, has anyone else done this and was it helpful?

I'd love to hear how others cope with the details of everyday life, keeping busy but not too busy.

TIA
Deb

[moonflower]

I am sorry you are having so much trouble with your grief about Franky.

I am having a similar time with losing my Maxie. But, having been down this road way too many times I know that I just have to ride this rollercoaster for awhile. I have cried every day for a month. Not all the time, but mornings, feeding times, etc.

I went to a grief counselor years ago when I lost my Dad. It was my first big loss and I wanted to feel better. The counselor said
"Why do you want to rush it. Wasn't he worth it?". That made me realize that grief is just a process that you have to go through, painful as it is. For me it takes about a month of real, present pain and then it starts to get a little better - still have times when it gets overwhelming again but the spaces between that get longer and longer and after about 18 months it becomes manageable. That is just me. Everyone is different.

But don't rush it and let it out. And breathe. I think it is good to try and keep busy to the extent you can without losing it. I am starting to do a little work now, but I could not have done that 2 weeks ago.

Unless you are incapacitated I would just ride it out and do what you can. How long has it been?

Cheryl and Angel Maxie