My Wonderful Ceaser, unexpected death Options

[ceaserthings]

I feel better knowing that I am not the only one who have had a pet die unexpectedly.
I thought for sure that my 12 year old Beage Ceaser whom I have shared a decade with, would quietly go in peace with his head resting on my lap under a tree from natural old age....But no...it didn't end up that way.
Ceaser started to vomit one afternoon and would not stop, I decided to give it the night thinking he was just ill from too much srapfood...
( I had fed him Chineses food..and is I swear I will never eat Chinese again. In the past, he had alwasy been fine but this time the portion was too much. )
Ceaser started to vomit friday afternoon and I called the vet that day to schedule an appointment, they were full and recommended the emergency vet. I decided to just give it the night.....and to check him in the morning.
When I woke up the next day, he was in horrible shape and I rushed him to the emergency vet...things happend so fast and I was in severe denial when the Dr was telling me how bad he really was. Too much grease and oil for his pancreas to handle resulted in an acute Pancreatitis whith a possible perfurated ulcer which resulted in overall severe perontitis and shock. He died a few hours later with me there. I had to go home real quick thinking he was going to make it but rushed right back per the Vet's order. He was waiting for me to pass. I got there and spent some time with him, spoke to him and petted him and then he went into a cardiac arrest. Long story short....I witnessed his soul leave his body and I believe that Ceaser waiting for me was his gift to me. He confirmed that our connection was real...our bond was real and that we truy loved and cared for aach other unconditionally.
It has been a month now and the acute emotional pain is slowly going away but I do miss him very much.
The guilt of why I didn't take him in sooner is still there and the guilt and regret of feeding him the chinese is even bigger.
The heavy feelings of loss and longing for the dog is greater than ever. First comes the initial attack of pain then the steady pain...then pain at times and then guilt, regret and the that pain leaves but another pain called longing starts; burdened by guilt and regret. So it is not easy and I know he is in Heaven and I enjoy his visits and when I get those "visits"...I feel much better and feel very blessed to be able to enjoy this relationship at another level!

I just wanted to share......I am working on his scrapbook and other projects that helps me re-live Ceaser's life.


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[ceaserthings]

Oh...gosh! Thank you sooo much for your wonderful support!!!

I feel for ALL of you when reading your experiences. Yes, the fact that I was there really helped! The scrapbooking is also another good thing but me being there was the best way but that is difficult for some and I feel for those who coulnd't be there.

Gossemerwings....I really feel for you! That must be hard but I know that she waited and sometimes I think they already know you know and the fact that you were rushing back was good enough for her to let go.....the fact that we are here writing ad talking about them in such positive light is wonderful for them, that is what I tell myself because if I died and through my soul I watched people write about me and make scrapbooks and collect pics, seek for support etc....I woud be very very happy to see how loved I was and am.


Thank you again for your support!!

I am so glad I found this website!

(jess..did the dog get similar symptoms..? I haven't found anybody who had the same thing happened yet so...I was curious when I read your reply)