Time Heals? Options

[Jess]

Everyone keeps telling me that time heals and that I will feel better with time, but the weird thing is, I don't feel like time is passing. I don't feel like I'm moving farther away from my cat's death. Every morning when I wake up, I feel like it happened the day before. It's like I'm stuck. Every morning, it feels like a fresh wound to my heart. I don't feel like I'm ever going to get past this and enjoy life again.

[MissingJoey]

Everyone keeps telling me that time heals and that I will feel better with time, but the weird thing is, I don't feel like time is passing. I don't feel like I'm moving farther away from my cat's death. Every morning when I wake up, I feel like it happened the day before. It's like I'm stuck. Every morning, it feels like a fresh wound to my heart. I don't feel like I'm ever going to get past this and enjoy life again.

Hello everyone. This is my first post, so hopefully I'm getting this right. My husband and I just lost our 8 month old little kitty cat Joey on Tuesday night. It hurts so bad. We just adopted him at the end of January, so we only had 4 short months together, but we are so blessed to have had him. He only had 3 legs! When we saw him on the computer, we knew he had to come into our home and be with us and our other animals. Over the last week he wasn't eating very well, and previously he had been in for continued cold symptoms, mainly a runny eye. Boy were we shocked to find out he had FIP and there was no treatment. We were with him when they put him to sleep. Last night I was haunted by those images. Yesterday my husband and I both stayed home from work to try to grieve, but today we had to go back. It was very hard to be back, but I will admit both of us felt a little better just to get out of the house and be busy with work tasks. Of course, then I felt guilty for not feeling as totally distraught as I had been yesterday. Both Tuesday night and all yesterday were awful. Lots of tears were shed. Tonight, I feel just the tiniest bit of peace (and even as I write that I feel guilty to say that). I also had some more moments of crying, but not as constant as the last 2 nights. I am hoping we'll continue to heal. I had been obsessively reviewing every moment in my head and blaming myself for everything, even though the vet said it was nothing we did or didn't do. Joey will always be in our hearts and we miss him so much. I offer my sympathy to all who are going through this. Thanks for sharing -- it has been helpful to read all of your thoughts and feelings, and I look forward to exchanging messages. The support is much appreciated. Love you Joey! <3

[Jess]

Hello everyone. This is my first post, so hopefully I'm getting this right. My husband and I just lost our 8 month old little kitty cat Joey on Tuesday night. It hurts so bad. We just adopted him at the end of January, so we only had 4 short months together, but we are so blessed to have had him. He only had 3 legs! When we saw him on the computer, we knew he had to come into our home and be with us and our other animals. Over the last week he wasn't eating very well, and previously he had been in for continued cold symptoms, mainly a runny eye. Boy were we shocked to find out he had FIP and there was no treatment. We were with him when they put him to sleep. Last night I was haunted by those images. Yesterday my husband and I both stayed home from work to try to grieve, but today we had to go back. It was very hard to be back, but I will admit both of us felt a little better just to get out of the house and be busy with work tasks. Of course, then I felt guilty for not feeling as totally distraught as I had been yesterday. Both Tuesday night and all yesterday were awful. Lots of tears were shed. Tonight, I feel just the tiniest bit of peace (and even as I write that I feel guilty to say that). I also had some more moments of crying, but not as constant as the last 2 nights. I am hoping we'll continue to heal. I was over&%^yzing everything and blaming myself for everything, even though the vet said it was nothing we did or didn't do. Joey will always be in our hearts and we miss him so much. I offer my sympathy to all who are going through this. Thanks for sharing -- it has been helpful to read all of your thoughts and feelings, and I look forward to exchanging messages. The support is much appreciated. Love you Joey! <3

I'm sorry to hear of Joey's passing. I, too, had trouble getting the images of my cat's passing out of my mind, but I am told that eventually those images fade and are replaced with memories of the happy times you shared together.

Wishing you peace.

[MissingJoey]

I'm sorry to hear of Joey's passing. I, too, had trouble getting the images of my cat's passing out of my mind, but I am told that eventually those images fade and are replaced with memories of the happy times you shared together.

Wishing you peace.

Thanks so much. I wish the same for you. I think even aside from the "image" of him laying there, I just kept wondering how it really felt for him and was he scared or angry at us, stuff like that. And then something I read online (after the fact) said that if you're going to be crying during this, it might scare your pet and maybe it's best not to stay during the procedure. So then more guilt came upon me for possibly causing Joey more stress at an already bad time. But I had to be there for him. My hubby says he was rubbing his paw and I was rubbing his head, and when they gave him the injection, Joey's eye moved and he (hopefully) saw us there with him. It's just so unfair. Thanks for letting me vent. Last night while trying to fall asleep, I kind of went into panic mode thinking all these horrible things. We printed pictures of Joey off my cell phone yesterday and I'm going to make a scrapbook. And we framed one and hung it on the wall, so we can talk to him when we walk by. I've also been writing little letters to him, just to capture our memories and how we're feeling. So that has helped.
How are you feeling tonight? Take care!

[Jess]

Thanks so much. I wish the same for you. I think even aside from the "image" of him laying there, I just kept wondering how it really felt for him and was he scared or angry at us, stuff like that. And then something I read online (after the fact) said that if you're going to be crying during this, it might scare your pet and maybe it's best not to stay during the procedure. So then more guilt came upon me for possibly causing Joey more stress at an already bad time. But I had to be there for him. My hubby says he was rubbing his paw and I was rubbing his head, and when they gave him the injection, Joey's eye moved and he (hopefully) saw us there with him. It's just so unfair. Thanks for letting me vent. Last night while trying to fall asleep, I kind of went into panic mode thinking all these horrible things. We printed pictures of Joey off my cell phone yesterday and I'm going to make a scrapbook. And we framed one and hung it on the wall, so we can talk to him when we walk by. I've also been writing little letters to him, just to capture our memories and how we're feeling. So that has helped.
How are you feeling tonight? Take care!

I can definitely relate to your feeling of panic. It's been three weeks since we put Sydney to sleep and I am just now beginning to feel the slightest bit of relief from the grief. For a long time afterward, I was in a state of utter disbelief that it had actually happened. I'm still not sure how I'm going to get up every morning and face each day without her. A piece of me died with her and I have this feeling of emptiness and this deep longing for her, but at least the pain is starting to subside. I know it could come back at any moment though. It has been an unpredictable roller-coaster of emotions.

(((HUGS)))