Loss Of Shellie Options

[tobin]

yesterday i had to have my dog, my friend, shellie put to sleep. she had an enlarged heart and the doctor said he had gone as far as he could with treatments. her rapid heartbeat and breathing problems were worse every couple of weeks. i knew the pain i would feel would be bad but i did not realize it would be this unbearable. i got shellie 8 years ago whenshe was 9 weeks old, got her for my wife...when i lost my wife, shellie and my mother became very close...when i lost my mother, shellie and i became even closer. i prayed that god would make her well as i know he could but that did not happen. now what should i think? i did not want to come home today knowing she would not be there. people will always say, it will get better with time but that is not very comforting. some say it is crazy to feel this way, after all it was only a dog BUT to me shellie was much much more than that to me. i have not felt this kind of agony since i lost my wife and quite honestly, i just don't know what to do or how to function. let my feelings show and to heck what people will think, or bottle it all up. i am usually a strong fella but the loss of my 4 legged, tail waggin little shellbell has put me down. talk about being depressed....what to do? anyone have any thoughts that could be of help to me, please..

[patricia]

tobin
im so sorry for your losses. i as well as everyone here can understand how excruciating losing a pet can be. i have been thru it many times and it never gets any easier. a pet offers unconditional love 24/7. and when that is gone we feel lost. i recently (about two weeks ago) lost my cat that id lived with for fourteen years. his name was fred. the pain that i feel is torture. fred took care of me thru the loss of my father, my surgery, the loss of his brother riley and so much more. he took with him my most intimate secrets and a big piece of my heart. i wish i could give you a magic answer and tell you to do this and that and then you will feel fine, but i cant. the only thing i can promise you is that time will heal. some of the things ive been doing to heal (and have done in the past) is to set up a little memorial for fred. i have pictures that i talk to every morning and night. his ashes will be returned to me soon and believe it or not it is so comforting to know that fred will be home soon. i light a special candle for him every night. it has a special scent that reminds me of fred. i did the same thing with riley and now when i miss him i open it up and smell his little candle. it floods me with wonderful memories and 9 times out of ten i end up laughing at some of his antics. but again, it took a long time to get there. also i wrote about my feelings a lot. i remember feeling such agonizing pain when riley passed away last year, that i turned to the internet and scoured to find a place where other people would understand my feelings. and while doing it i also found that my local humane society offered free group counseling for people who were grieving the loss of their pet. maybe that is something that is offered near you. and it was a wonderful mix of men and women. it eased my pain to be amongst people who were going thru what i was going thru. mine is offered once a month, so i will be attending soon. also this time around i call a 1 800 number and talked with a counseler specializing in pet loss, over the phone. they too understand what we are feeling after all they know that youre heart is broken, youre sad, youre angry, you may be feeling guilt.
i picked up my freds carrying case last night. its his last belonging and i sobbed like a baby. this will go on for a long time. a year later, i still cry over riley when "his" song comes on the radio or even when i look at his little dish...
time will heal and when you remember your shellie, imagine her pain free, without her breathing problems and running thru the tall grass in the sunlight. again, im so sorry. you will be in my prayers.