Death And Dying Pet Support, Anyone else like this after 6 weeks? Options

[kanecutter]

Since I work from home and own a pet sitting/dog walking business, my girl was with me 24/7 for the last 9 years. I fostered her, she was a very sad soul at first, neglected abused 1st 3 yrs of life. I ended up keeping her and loved her so much I wrapped my entire life around getting her out to run for hours each day and then when she became ill last Fall, all I did was work on keeping her happy, nothing else mattered.

I had to have her euthanized a little over a month ago. I wanted to die with her. It was the worse pain I have ever gone through in my life. During the first two weeks I literally could not stay in my own skin in the house alone...had to avoid the bone chilling absence of her presence. After the third week I began trying to rebuild my business and kept distracted that way.

Has anyone ever suddenly felt like dying again six weeks later? I thought after the third week Iwas getting better and able to work - concentrate on something besides the pain and emptiness. Suddenly, this weekend, I just feel like she's gotta be here with me as before or else I cannot function again. It's like the importance of life is gone. If she is not here, I'm in a pit and nothing can ever be right. Like I tried to function thru the loss and failed. Has anyone else thought they saw the light at the end of the tunnel and then suddenly it's gone. Just a dream that I could go on living. Suddenly, 6 weeks later I cannot go on like this unless distracted by a movie or by talking to people. Thought things would get easier, but instead it's suddenly worse.

Thanks for any input.

[sissycat]

Oh yes!!!!

It is such a rollar coaster ride. In less than 3 months will be a year for me and I still have days where I think how can I ever make it another day. We just have to. No one can predict how long our own personal grief will last and don't let anyone try and rush you! Just keep on as you have. Know there are so many of us here for you/have been in your position at some point or another.
Maybe sharing some stories or pictures may help. I also come here every Thurday just to post a special little note to my Sissycat. Even if it is one sentence or a paragraph. It seems to help me so much.

Hugs to you and your angel baby!!