New Here, And About To Lose Our First Dog. :( Options

[dobermandad]

Hello everyone,

I came across your forum while researching the topic of coping with the death of a pet. It's a topic I've been trying to familiarize myself with for quite some time now, as our doberman, Deuce, has been afflicted with a number of maladies over the past couple of years: Addison's Disease, a heart condition... and most recently, a neurological disorder that has caused him to lose the reflexes in his hind legs. Sadly, at his age (approximately 9-10) and with his other problems, he's not a candidate for any additional surgeries or intense treatments; and after taking a turn for the worse this week, we've accepted that it's time to let him go. Deuce is being put to sleep tomorrow at 5:45.

Naturally, I'd always been wary of making this decision. I didn't want to make it too soon, while he may still have had some enjoyable time left; nor did I want to wait too long and reach the point where he was simply being kept alive without truly LIVING. Friends and vets alike had told me that "he'll let you know when it's time." I honestly feel like he's done just that. This week, he's been unable to stand on his own. He's clearly in pain, and he snapped at me last night when I tried to help him up--the first time he's ever snapped at anyone. I've had to carry him up and down the stairs, (not an easy chore with an 80 lb. dog, and he never liked being lifted even when he was healthy) and he just whines whenever he's left alone for more than a few moments at a time. He's not himself at all, and I see things only getting worse if we wait any longer.

We thought we were losing him 3 weeks ago, when he first showed signs of collapsing. I took him to his vet, who suspected that he was experiencing a heart problem and ordered overnight observation at an emergency facility. We feared that he wouldn't make it out of that facility. Instead, the next day, he showed considerable improvement! He was back home, eating, and even playing with toys. However, that was when we accepted that his long-term prognosis wasn't good at all, nor would it likely BE very long. Whatever was causing his loss of mobility was likely a spinal or brain condition, which would require a barrage of MRIs and risky surgery simply to diagnose--and we just can't subject him to that, let alone afford it. After conferring with Deuce's vet, we basically decided that we'd just try to make him as comfortable as possible in the coming days/weeks--and the next time he took a turn for the worse, we'd likely have to put him down. That's where we are now.

We're dreading what's about to be done in less than 24 hours, but anxious to get it over with at the same time.

We have 3 other dogs, besides Deuce. Ironically, he's not even the oldest. But I suppose being the biggest, and being a pure bred, he's just been prone to more problems. He's always faced them with the utmost stoicism, too. His vets were always amazed at how stoic he's been throughout it all. But needless to say, despite all the preparation I've tried to do for tomorrow, it's going to hit me like a ton of bricks when he's actually gone.

To this point, I've actually held up pretty well. I've accepted that it's the right decision at the right time. That became clear to me when I realized that hearing Deuce's crying and knowing that we could no longer do anything to help him was harder than the thought of losing him. I keep telling myself that this needs to be done; that this is the best thing I can do for my friend to ease his suffering. Those thoughts seem to help; but then I'll see something as simple as a favorite squeaky toy and realize that he'll never play with that again--and that's when I feel overcome with emotion.

I guess I just wanted to write in the hopes of hearing from those who've been through this experience before. Reading some of your stories throughout this forum has already helped a great deal.

It has also been a tremendously tough month on us. In addition to Deuce's problems, we learned that a close family friend committed suicide 2 weeks ago (a week after her 21st birthday), and on the very same day, another friend suffered a miscarriage. I almost feel like Deuce was somehow preparing us for both that grief as well as what we're about to go through tomorrow. After spending that night at the emergency vet, we were given this opportunity to spend more time with him and to prepare as much as possible for the inevitable. As difficult as it is, I have to think it's much easier this way--as opposed to losing a pet unexpectedly.

Any positive vibes you can send will be much appreciated... especially tomorrow around 5:45, as it certainly won't be much of a "happy hour."

[AngelCareOne]

Posted Today, 01:00 AM by: dobermandad
Dottie, thank you so much for taking the time to put together such thoughtful tributes to Deuce--seeing him in this different light is almost like seeing new photos of him for the very first time, and very special. It's also fitting that you chose the Egyptian theme, as Deuce's regal Dobe head always reminded me a bit of the ancient hieroglyphics of Anubis, the jackal-headed god.

You're very welcome, Richard. Also, I think you may be a bit psychic. I was thinking of Anubis when the ancient Eyptian theme came to me because Deuce being so similar in appearance!

Exceedingly regal and royal indeed. Look at that. Holy Cow!

Anubis is among a very small handful of the most ancient Egyptian gods and felt by many if not most of the ancients to actually be the son of Ra. Wow! According to ancient Egyptian mythology, Anubis is the god who is friend and guide to those who have crossed over leading them on their path through the afterlife. He tests their knowledge of the gods, their faith and places their hearts on the Scales of Justice during the 'Judging of the Heart' in the 'Hall of Judges' ... All 42 of them.

But, I wasn't even thinking of any of that. Honest and for true. My thoughts were only of the physical resemblance to Deuce. Still, cool beans! Oh, Deuce is royalty though. No doubt about that.

Big Comforting Hugs, Love and Peace to You, Your Dear Wife and Deuce!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

PS. I do love the study of all ancient cultures, and Egypt is at the tippity top of my favorites. Just one of my passions along with archaeology, paleontology, astronomy, physics, anatomy, forensics, and all that kind of "stuff." Who'd a thunk it?

PS. PS. Yes, I certainly do a lot of those. The "PS." thing, that is to say. Something else just popped into my noggin. See the image of the golden Egyptian hieroglyphs that I chose for one of Deuce's Tributes? Look at the very first hieroglyph to the far left and the last one on the far right at the top and bottom which I placed there. It's an Ankh. Oh My Goodness. I know that you know the meaning and significance of the Ankh to the ancient Egyptians as well as millions of people to this current day in all cultures. The Ankh is the symbol which represents Eternal and/or Immortal Life!

Dearest Richard and Wife, I, like Albert Einstein, also believe that ... Well, let me quote him and I hope I have this verbatim since I've not googled. One of my very, very favorite and most sagacious philosophical quotes by Einstein is: "I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice." In other words, it ain't no coincidence that you and I thought of Anubis given all his mythological "duties" and his great resemblance to Deuce. Also, it ain't no coincidence that I chose that golden Egyptian hieroglyph image displaying the Ankh to the far left and right for above and at the bottom of Deuce's Tribute ...

Deuce does indeed Live Eternally!!! Now, how wonderful is that? *Big Smile!* And More Hugs!!!

Next, I'd love very much to discuss what you posted above giving actual scientific, medical and laws of physics proof that we do indeed continue after we've shed this most confining mortal coil. You bet we do. Thank you so much for sharing your feelings and Deuce with us. Many Bright Blessings!

[Candy's Dad]

Hi there,

I just wanted to add my sincere condolences to you. I just caught up with your thread, I haven't been on as much this week. He looked like such a sweetheart, I know how it feels to miss such a precious furkid such as your. I pray you and your family will find some comfort and know he's at peace.

All my best

Candy's Dad

Hal