Kasha, Mommys Lil Girl, 18 days without my baby Options

[Stargazer_gold]

I'm so glad to have found this site. 18 days ago I had to put my little westie mix girl to sleep. I am devastated beyond belief! Kasha had a relaspe of a middle ear infection, she didnt know up from down and her eyes rolled around wildly. The Vet didnt have much hope for her. After 3 days of treatment he finally said it was time and that she was suffering. So I said go ahead and put her to sleep. Now I have feelings of guilt, I should of been there for her last moments to comfort her and ease her passage but I wasnt strong enough to do this one last thing for her, I will never forgive myself for letting her down. I wonder if I should of taken her else where for a second opinion..........so many unasnswered questions. I am so lost without her little presence. Tomorrow her ashes should be in at the vets, so tomorrow will be a really hard day for me. I have 2 other dogs but they dont seem to be any comfort to me, I was really only close to Kasha, from the day I got her we formed such a strong and loving bond. I spoiled her beyond reason and for that i do take comfort in, she may not of had long in this world but at least she had it all for the time she was here. I miss the smell of her, sounds crazy but I do. When I went to bed at night she slept with her head on my pillow cuddled up to me and I would put my face down in her fur , smelling her and I would go to sleep that way. Everything I did I did for her. Now I feel as if I have nothing but this empty painful void in my heart. I feel like I have lost something vital in my life that will never be replaced. Kasha truely was one of a kind and unique. 3 years was not enough time.

[ryancat]

Dear Stargazer,oh,I know just how that feels.......I still miss my boy Sox so much and he's been gone since Oct. 13th.Our home is still so quiet and empty without him even though we have another kitty who's name is Miss Mini. She isn't a replacement for him and she never will be.You are still hurting because you miss your baby.It hasn't been that long since it happened and you have to give yourself some time to grief for her.I know that's so hard and at times you don't feel like you want to go on but you have to.....I hope you know that it will get easier in time.You'll never get used to it,you'll just have to live in a new reality.My thoughts and prayers are with you and you are certainly not alone in your grief.I'm still there with you so I understand how much it hurts.I'm so sorry for your loss.Sincerely,Renee (Sox's mom)