Guilt, Why do so many of us feel this? Options

[Daisy's Mommy]

After losing my Daisy on April 1, 2006, I luckily found this group. Reading and posting has helped me so much, but I keep wondering about one thing. I have read countless posts of people expressing their guilt regarding the end of their pet's life. And I felt terrible guilt myself.

I wonder why all these people, who obviously took wonderful care of their pets and made that loving decision at the end to let their pets leave without suffering, felt guilty.

Then I realized, that for me perhaps - it was less painful in a way to focus on my guilt, to replay each decision in my mind - then to face the reality that I could do nothing for someone I loved so much and that she is really gone. The what if's and the guilt serve to keep the more painful thoughts out of my mind.

Does anyone have any thoughts about this?

Daisy's Mommy

[blackjacksmom]

guilt, guilt, and more guilt. not only do i feel guilty for having to put my sweet blackjack to rest (the day i can say that and not see his precious eyes staring at me can not come too soon), and re-examining our 15 years together and feeling guilty because i wasn't with him 24/7 (as if that would have been possible), but i get a call today - i had been volunteering with the local shelter - and the lady asks if i can foster a dog who had until 4pm to find a home. i think and think and think about it, but i'm just not ready. as much as i don't want this dog to die, i can't handle having another dog in the apartment yet, sniffing in blackjack's bed(s), food bowl, etc. it's too soon (3 weeks tomorrow). my cat is barely acting normal; i'm still a mess. so now i feel guilty about this other dog AND i start thinking about the weeks prior to blackjack's death and the times i spent at the shelter should have been spent with him!!

from a logical standpoint, i can say to myself, 'it's all irrational. blackjack had a wonderful life. you were helping other dogs who were not as fortunate as blackjack. this other dog (and consequently all the dogs in the shelters) are not your responsibility. but what i FEEL is completely opposite of this.

i wish there were some answer to guilt and why we punish ourselves by concentrating on these feelings.