Goodbye Spunky Girl Options

[mittens_is_gone]

3/16/06
About 2 1/2 hours ago, I took my cat Spunky to the vet. She passed away today, unfortunately, while I was out.
I feel horrible about her being alone when she died. I am so sorry about that.
As I cried, I kept saying to her that I was sorry that she was alone.
She is now with her sister, who we lost a year ago last November.
We have no cats in the house now.
I left the towel and the clothes basket that I took her to the vet in, at the vet. I coudn't bring them home.
I have all of her stuff around the house and I don't want to move it.
I can't look at the spot where I found her without breaking down.
I feel so bad about her being alone.

Spunky, baby, Mommy is so sorry that you died alone. Love you sweetie.


Thanks for listening.

Janice
Mittens and Spunky's Mom

[val]

Janice,

I am so very sorry for your loss.

I can completely relate to what you are going through. On 3/1 at 5:30 pm, I brought my beautiful 13.5 year old tabby, Becker (Becky) to the vet. She had been very ill (and I was afraid that I was going to need to have her put to sleep) but the vet recommended hospitalizing her to hydrate her. When I called the morning of 3/2 to check her progress, I was told she had passed during the night or morning, and I felt so terrible that she died alone in the vet's office. The responses to my post helped me a great deal. I've come to believe that she passed peacefully, and on her own terms, as she probably needed to be alone in order to pass. Would I have preferred to be with her? Of course! She had been through thick and thin with me, and I wanted to be able to do the same for her at the end. But I honestly feel she was either trying to protect me from seeing her pass, or that she was finally comfortable enough to let go. I still miss her so much, and have my good days and my bad days, but I believe she is in a much better place, happy and free of pain.

Interestingly, when I started my car to go to the vet's to say my goodbye's after I learned that she had passed, the last three lines of the Matchbox 20 song 'Disease' came on - - "I’m free of my disease, Yeah well free of my disease, Free of my disease." I cried and then sort of laughed at the same time, and said "O.k. Becky Girl, I get it."

Try to focus on the special times you had and wonderful memories you made with Spunky. May those memories comfort you.

Take good care,
Val