When Is The Right Time?, I feel guilty even asking this... Options

[Dukerman]

When is the right time to bring a new baby into your life after losing the most important baby you ever had? My Duke can never, ever be replaced...and I would never even try to replace him.

I feel awful even thinking about it.

[Saki & Freyj...]

Angela,

I think it is always the right time.

People vary. I very much wanted to wait. Actually-- I never wanted another dog. Cats, yes, but in my mind I just did not ever want another dog. Tim's (husband) grief was just as intense, but very very different. And 6 weeks after, we had a new puppy. When we got Hathor, I was being sort of "selfless" (the idea of me being selfless makes me laugh). But I gave in to Tim's desire for a new dog just bc I could tell he needed that.

About 9 months later we adopted/rescued hathor's best friend from the neighborhood, Chata. We are both madly in love with both of them.

We got new cats a week after Electra passed.

Duke taught you about love and joy. And if you can open your heart and give that to another animal, it is an honor to Duke. It's nothing to feel guilty about. It means he taught you well....

One thing you must NOT expect though is for the hurt to go away. Tim was shocked by the way Hathor as a new puppy intensified his grief over the loss of Freyja. I had done a lot of reading, so I expected that. I KNOW how empty the house is without Duke. And having a new pet does help to fill up that empty quiet. But probably, everything the new pet does will remind you of how Duke either also did that or never did that-- and that can hurt.

--Jennifer