Living Without Amber Visibly There, Moving Forward Is Hard Options

[luv_my_catz]

Hello All ,

Today I am faced with the dilema of inertia ~ I cannot seem to move beyond where I am in my grief ~ I have the Master Bedroom closed ~ Amber's ashes are in there ~ the flowers on the table ~ the music playing ~ the quiet beauty of her life and the peaceful retreat we shared preserved ~ I feel as though I would be betraying her by letting the other cat in that room ~ she was protected from him in her little safe world there with me ~ He lost his rights to be in there by attacking her so much when she was beginning to show her age years ago ~ I cannot imagine sleeping in my bed without her there - or allowing him to "invade " her domain ~ its just not honorable ~ so now I don't know what to do ~ I have a lovely Master Suite ~ yet cannot find the way to reclaim it and integrate the sweet memories of " Amber's Days" with the Hope for the future and years I may have left with Ceece ~ he is a sweet ol' boy just always was too in his own world to ever properly learn cat protocol ~ I am stuck ~ I need to remain true to my loyalty to Ambie and her spirit within and without my soul ~ yet I do not want to keep myself locked in the past ~ life is filled with integrations and weavings of the spirits we have with us and the events we find ourselves moving through ~ I tried to sleep in the guest room ~ that didn't work either ~ so for now its back to the sofa bed ~ I am in a quandry ~ does anyone have any ideas?

Many THANKS,
Kathryn

[Ann H]

Dear Kathryn, I think Ambie knows and understands how you feel and that you want to protect her room that you shared with her. You will just have to do what feels right to you, give yourself a little time and see how it goes. I agree with the others and Kristie is so right it is not where Amber was but who she was with that filled her with love. Still I know it is hard I thought about shutting my door the my other furbaby after Snookie left this world but I did not want her to feel unloved either.
Love, Ann