My Cat Miranda Marie Options

[Mellie]

Greetings All

We lost our year old kitty Miranda (Rannies) on Sat 06.16 at ~10p CST. I've lost animals before, but the grief I'm experiencing over Rannies passing has completely surprised me. I'm wondering if the grief I feel is connected to the way she left our planet. A client of mine sent me a lovely blooming day lily as a thank you and I had no idea just how deadly they are to cats. No I do. I knew about pointsettias, cyclemen, english ivy, oleander, but never did it occur to me that the lily would be poisonous.

Our babies are dependent on us for safety, security and love and I let my little Rannies down in a giagantic way. I took her to the vet after she vomited a third time over two days and he thought perhaps she had an obstruction. After xrays, it was confirmed, so doc took her to immediate surgery and removed what looked like raffia. I had sent a gift and used raffia bow a few days before, so I thought I had dropped a string or two and she took off before I knew it. Crap. Upon coming out of anesthesia, she began having siezures and he treated her with Phenobarbital and thought perhaps she was having hyper-sensitive response to the antisedan used to help her out of anesthesia. He stayed with her through the evening and he tried everything to save her.

Doc was pretty baffled and upset, as she was a young, healthy girl and shouldn't have died from the procedure. I understand there are risks with anethesia, but something didn't seem right. Doc was so bothered, he had a difficult time sleeping and came back to the clinic to do some additional research and found that Rannies kidneys had totally failed... indicative of poisoning. He rang to tell me as he was concerned for our other two cats and suggested I do a thorough sweep of the house to look for toxic agents (our cats are totally indoor pets). Only thing I fuind was the lily in the window where Rannies loved to hang out. I called doc back and he confirmed the toxicity of the lily and this is what led to her death. What we thought was raffia was actually the thin leaves and stems of the plant.

I can't stop thinking about Rannies. I can't stop thinking she was in terrible pain and/or afraid. I feel like I failed her.

I miss her like crazy and the grief is just as crazy. I know it's only been a few days, but it seems all these feelings will last forever. Does it get any easier with time? Will I stop imaging me petting her?

I wonder if my greif will decrease if I knew that she wasn't afraid and/or in pain. Would the Phenobarbital injections and tablet doc put in her tummy help with her pain? Does anyone know?

I know we are all hurting as a result of the loss of a dear pets and I hate it for each one of us. Even though the circumstances are so sad, it's nice to know I can come somewhere where others empathize with my greif.

Love and gentle hugs to all my sad compadres.

Best,

Mellie

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[moon_beam]

Hi, Mellie, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Miranda. Losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company. Losing a companion so very young and unexpectedly intensifies the grief.

Mellie, this grief journey is filled with so many different emotions that can overwhelm us all at one time and can make us feel like we are literally going insane. Unfortunately guilt is one of the many emotions and it is one of the more difficult ones to reconcile. As I read through your account of what happened with your beloved Miranda it is perfectly clear that you did everything you could to give her a happy and healthy earthly journey. You had no idea that the plant would be enticing to your Miranda to investigate - - much less eat - - and you had no idea that it would be deadly. You did the very right thing in taking your Miranda to the vet where treatment could begin to try to find out what happened and try to restore good health to her. Unfortunately sometimes, as the case with your beloved Miranda, even the most heroic measures do not end with a positive outcome. I hope somehow you will be able to have peace in your heart that you did NOT kill your beloved Miranda, you did NOT fail her. Your beloved Miranda is eternally grateful to you for all your loving devotion during her earthly journey. You are blessed with the privilege of having her eternal love for you to cherish and treasure in your heart and your memories as you continue in your earthly journey.

Please let me try to reassure you that in time the deep seering pain of sorrow that is in your heart now will eventually ease, but it will take time, Mellie - - one day at a time, one moment at a time in your own way and in your own time. Unfortunately there is no fast forward or delete button you can press that can speed up the process or immediately make it disappear. One of the many things you need to remember is that you are not alone in your grief journey, Mellie. Each of us here do understand what you are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. You are among friends here, Mellie - - there are no judgments made here.

I know right now there are no adequate words in any language that can soothe the seering pain of loss that is in your heart. I can only hope and pray that the words I share with you will offer you some measure of comfort, support, encouragement, and hope as you travel your grief journey.

Thank you so much for sharing your beloved Miranda with us, Mellie. What a precious little girl she is!!! Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Mellie, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[DannysMom]

Mellie, please accept my sincere sympathies on the loss of your precious Miranda. My heart goes out to you. What a sweet, fluffy little girl she was, that is such a nice photo of her. Mellie, you must be devastated by the loss of your sweet young kitty, and had you known how poisonous lilies are for cats you would never have brought one of those plants near her. Losing Miranda in such a tragic way makes it all the more painful, and I know there is little I can say to comfort you at this time. Just please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.


Hugs,
DannysMom

[John P]

Mellie, please accept my sympathies on your loss of Miranda Marie. Her picture is very charming. It's a terrible shock to lose a young cat, and so suddenly. I did not know that lilies are poisonous to cats, or if it's common knowledge. Your vet sounds completely competent and conscientious... he did everything he could. The phenobarbitol is a sedative. If your cat were in any pain the vet would have alleviated it. You didn't want her to be in pain, and she doesn't want you to be in pain either.

[Gretta's Mom]

Hi Mellie's mom

Just a quick stop by to let you know that I feel for you deeply in the passing of Ms Miranda Marie. In the words of my vet when my Gratta passed last year, "She's in a safe place now." Will write more later tonight.

She's a BEAUTIFUL, STUNNING kittie!!

Gretta's mom