Hey Sweeties.

Just missing you.

Took the van in an hour ago to get a tire fixed, cos it had a slow leak. The guy showed me a piece of wire that was in it. And I started thinking about you George. Started thinking how when we did the siding on the back of the house that we needed to find all the nails because you liked to sleep there and I didn't want you getting hurt. And then the tears welled up in my eyes, because you never come to see me. Or do you? And I just don't remember? I miss you so much George and I'm sorry about what happened and that I wasn't there for you when you left us. Please don't be mad at me. I love you and I miss you so, so much. I'd love to see you again - all of you. I wish I could hold you again. I never feel you around me either. Izzy never looks up at the ceiling anymore. Are you all gone now? If you are, I hope that means you're happy. I hope you're with family members who have passed, like my nan, or baba and papa and our two other kids that we never got to meet here on earth.

Anyway, change the subject. The doodles are doing well. They've all lost some weight. They're looking good. Barney's back to jumping on the bed again. He quit for a while because he was so rolly polly. Still eating the new food. Barney just turned seven last Wednesday. Casey's is in a couple weeks. How time flies. They all miss you George. I'm not sure how much they remember you Hunny. I'm sure Izzy does, but the other two - they were only six months when you left us. They still like to sing. Not the same without you though. They love their daily walks. I don't know what we're gonna do when it gets cold though - and when it's dark by 4. They won't like that.

Carly still loves her new Jeep. I keep calling it a van - just to bug her. She has a training course next month. Just a day one. She bought tickets to a Don Williams concert for my birthday, so we have that to go to the night before her birthday. Can you believe our girl is gonna be 20 next month Lily? How time has flown. We have a photo of you and her on the living room wall. You were both so young, maybe four or so. You both looked so happy together. Brought tears to my eyes. Oh how it would be nice to turn back time.

I miss you all so much. Please come visit me some time. Probably will make me sad, but I'd love to see you all - all of you. Been thinking about you too, Bud and Lady. It's been such a long time. I hope you are all so happy wherever you are.

Anyway, I'll talk to you later.

Love you. Forever and ever.

Mum.

thank you so much for checking on me. it helps tremendously. i'm doing better. it's a process and i have so many hauntings to process and i miss madelynne so much. there was so much good and love in her, that all perished with the sick part of her brain. i have to believe she is happy, loved and safe, free from all the earthly shackles.

i spent some time reading your precious notes to your peeps. i wish there was some magic sign by which you could be assured that love never dies- it just takes on a different form and you have to be ready to receive it. i have no doubt all your precious children are with you and pray they give you signs they are there.

Thanks Monique for your kind reply. Happy to hear you're feeling better.

Hey Angels.

Have you seen Smokie? I haven't seen him in almost two weeks. I hope he's ok. He doesn't usually disappear for this long. I hope he's not there with you. I know he can be a pain, but I don't want anything bad to happen to him. He's been fighting with Bugger and Twinkle Toes. He's getting old so maybe the other two chased him off. Hope not.

Talk to you later ok babes.

Love you. Mum.

Hi Angels.

Still haven't seen Smokie. I hope he's not there with you. I hope he's just hiding in the yard somewhere. He's been with us so long, I hate to lose him. I know he's been a git lately, but still love him.

I heard yesterday that there are a few more of you wherever you are. I'm so sorry kitties. But you are in a good place now. You'll be safe for all eternity. I'm so sorry that this had to happen though.

Hey babies. I'm feeling a little blue this afternoon. Not too sure why, but just thought I'd come here and say hi. I would like to be at home right now, snuggling with my beans. I miss you all so much. Even now, after all this time, I still long to hold you all.

I can't believe August is almost over. It'll soon be winter - ugh - hate winter so much.

This day is sooooooooooo long. I wish it was over already.

Oh well, find something to do for another hour and a half. Thank goodness it's Friday tomorrow! At least the weather's supposed to be nice this weekend. Not like last weekend where it rained all weekend and was really cold. Summer's over though, you can feel it in the air. It doesn't matter how warm the temperature gets, there is that crispness in the air now. The days are shorter. It's dark in the mornings. I hate this - summer should be so much longer in this country.

I'm tired today, maybe why that's why I'm feeling the way I am.

Anyway, talk to you all later.

Love you.

Forever and ever - Mum.

gosh, how unsettling about smokie. i wish he would just come home...

sorry you are feeling blue and tired today. i understand this cycling and having up and down days. winters are hard for me, too. i dread the shorter days even more than the cold. the darkness in the morning and early sundowns make me feel even more isolated than normal. i used to love the cold, as well as rainy, overcast days. after i lived in the south 5 years, that all changed. i still struggle with the humidity of the summers, but all in all have become a fair weather gal.

i hope you feel better soon and that smokie shows up soon!

Hi Angels.

Still no Smokie. Is he there with you? I hope not. I wish he would come home. I would feel better knowing where he is. I haven't seen Raccoon eyes the last couple days either. I don't know what is with Ruby. She and Raccoon eyes were all lovey-dovey a couple weeks ago, then Ruby started beating her up. Probably chased her away. I don't know why. Raccoon eyes has a baby still to look after. But Ruby is looking after all the kittens. Very weird.

Casey birthday next Tuesday. I can't believe Barney and Casey are seven already. And Izzy eleven. How time flies! We miss you all. George - oh how my heart aches for you. I wish you could home for Casey's birthday. I wish you could come home!

Anyway, talk to you all later. Gotta go.

Love forever and ever. Mum.

Missing you my darlings. Smokie still hasn't come home. If he's there with you - take care of him and let him know how much we love him.

Love Mum.

National Pet Memorial Day.

Missing you all so much.

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))

Hi Angels.

Just writing to let you know how much I miss you all and how much I love you. I love you babies and I miss you all so very much.

Love forever and ever, Mum.

Missing you babies. Wish you could come home.

I love you.

hi lynette,

just visiting, thinking of you. hope you are doing ok.

xoxo

Thanks for checking in on me Monique.

Not doing so well this evening. I have six kittens that seem to have lost their mother. They're about 3 weeks or so I figure. When I checked on them Sunday they seemed ok. I took them out of the box they were in. The mother was here on the weekend I'm sure. Came back from a walk with the dogs tonight and heard them crying. When I checked on them, they were all really cold. And obviously hungry. I brought them in the house and managed to warm them up. Tried to feed them, but they really weren't interested. One is not doing as well as the others. I don't know what to do with them. I can't have them in the house. I can't feed them every couple hours during the night. Talk about feeling like a big fat failure. I put them in a laundry basket full of towels and an old coat and put them in the garage. There are other cats in there. I'm hoping they'll jump in and keep them warm. But I'm hoping Duchess will step up and feed them. I'm pretty sure she still has a bit of milk. Whether she will and whether she has enough milk I don't know. If not they're doomed. Life sucks. Big time. It's gonna be cold tonight too, minus 3 celsius. Duchess is not the best mother, but I sure hope she tries. I know I bottle fed some kittens last year, Duchess was one of them. But it was summer then. They could be outside. It's cold now. Why does life have to be so hard all the time?

I miss you guys and I love you. Please watch over them tonight and keep them safe and warm - and alive. Thanks babes.

Love you.

oh my goodness! did you put duchess with them and tried to get them to suckle? i pray they will be ok. they desperately need nourishment, even if you can only do it a few times a day... every two hours is really not necessary, but to not feed them at all ... can you leave some goat's milk for them, or kitten formula?

Hi.

They made it through the night. But I'm pretty sure one of them is not going to make it. The mother showed up last night, but wanted nothing to do with them. So, I think it's safe to say that she has abandoned them. She's a wild one. They were warm this morning, so Duchess must've been with them. I just hope she can feed them. She wasn't around last night when I went to bed. I phoned Carly to take them out of the box and leave them on the ground in front of the window, hoping the stronger ones will find their way to Duchess. Hopefully, they'll still be okay when I get home, and I'll try feeding them again. Nature can be so cruel. Mind you probably my fault their mother left them. I took them out of the box on Sunday and she probably decided that because I'd touched them, they were no good or something.

It's going to be a long day, I'll be worrying about them all day.

Stuck at work doing nothing when I could be at home taking care of these little guys. How cruel is life? Carly said three of them aren't looking so good, said they were cold again. I didn't touch them all this morning, just the one that I know is probably not going to make it. I'm hoping the stronger ones will find their way to Duchess and hoping she has a bit of milk to keep them going until I get home tonight. I feel so bad, so helpless.

Please angels, watch over them and keep them safe and alive till I can get home and feed them tonight.

I love you all.

Mum.

Stupid! Stupid! I should've brought them to work with me. They could've stayed in the van and I could've gone out and fed them every few hours. Now I've sentenced them to a slow death because I wasn't thinking. I just wanna cry.

what a horrible trial on every front! i don't believe touching them, though, causes the mother to abandon them. birds, for ex., ... you can put babies back in the nest or if the nest was destroyed or you cannot reach it, you can put the babies in a makeshift nest near where the parents and/or nest are, and the parents will come back to take care of their babies. i cannot imagine the mom would abandon them because you tried to help. but, if they are in a closed garage, where the mom can't get to them, then she may have given up.

i'm very sorry for all the heartache you are experiencing now.

(((((((((hugs))))))))))

can carly not feed them? can she put them on a water bottle?

Hi Monique.

They are not closed up in anyway, she can very easily access them. I put them back where she had them. Just last night though I wrapped them up in some towels. She knew they were there - she could hear them. This morning she was no where to be seen. Duchess was around though. And Ruby. I know Ruby has no milk, but maybe she'll keep them warm. My husband is setting up the heat lamp for them this morning. Should've done that last night but it was pitch black and there's no power out there. Hopefully, if they stay warm, they'll have a chance and still be alive tonight. God I hope so.