thru my tears Dottie

thankyou

AWWW OF COURSE, ELAINE. MANY TIGHT COMFORTING HUGS, DEAR ONE!!!

ALWAYS,
DOTTIE xoxoxox

Hi you-
All the kids are fine thankfully.Chilly had what we hope is the last of some medical.When we adopted the previous owner had a stack of med bill receipts of all kinds of surgeries and procedures.The previous owner(the one who rescued her from a trailer park in the ghetto portion of the town I live in,had to give her up as he lost his job,had to move to another state to stay with relatives.He was devastated in having to give her up.) she is sweet like Willy was (lily is also a sweetie.She is still young and has a little princess thing goin on.As my Mom used to say"Fulla piss and vinegar") Chilly has an area on top of Her head that smells like purple grape juice.The only other bully I have ever noticed that on was Willy.Kinda weird.She also does a few things like only he could.Sometimes i swear when i'm hugging her I can feel like I'm with Willy again.July 3rd was the 10th month of Willy passing.The sadness is the same.

remember that guy John I asked about a while back? long story short he made a fool of me in the professional circles we travel in.like my Mom I tend to help people right away when they need help.I helped this dude with something awhile back then sort of played me for a fool after.I have to be vague sorry.in short this guy is an asshole.i have bad thoughts about him and I don't like myself for it.frankly,I think i tend to want to please people like my mom but that is changing.

sounds like your healing process is taking awhile.You are developing one helluva right hand though(See,no pity.pity is for sissies,and baby one thing you and me aint are sissies.)
I'll check out # 320

"My arse is a banjo" that is one of the funniest lines I have ever heard.I'm gonna steal it!!!!!!


catch up witcha soon Miss Dottie..................The Bub Dude..............remember 'Bub' on 'My Three Sons"?

HI BUBBA. SO SORRY TO BE THIS LATE IN GETTING BACK TO YOU. WOW, I DIDN'T REALIZE THE WHOLE STORY ABOUT CHILLY'S RESCUE. HOW DEAR OF THE PREVIOUS OWNER TO HAVE RESCUED HER FROM THAT GOSH AWFUL PLACE AND DO ALL HE POSSIBLY COULD TO GET HER THE MEDICAL HELP SHE SO SORELY NEEDED. I'LL BET IT BROKE HIS HEART INDEED WHEN HE HAD TO GIVE HER UP AFTER HE LOST HIS JOB. DARN GOOD THING THAT YOU AND YOUR DEAR WIFE CAME ALONG. WHAT A GOD SEND FOR YOU, THE PREVIOUS OWNER AND OF COURSE CHILLY DOG. HUGS!!!

HOW WONDERFUL THAT CHILLY IS SWEET LIKE WILLY AND HAS THAT AREA ON TOP OF HER HEAD THAT SMELLS LIKE GRAPE JUICE JUST LIKE WILLY. I REMEMBER YOU SAYING THAT BEFORE A COUPLE TIMES SO IT MUST MEAN A WHOLE LOT TO YOU. STILL, SORTA BITTERSWEET SO TO SPEAK CUZ I SEE YOUR PAIN OF WILLY'S LOSS AIN'T GOT ANY BETTER. I HEAR YOU THERE, MY FRIEND. JULY 3RD WAS THE 10 MONTH MARK OF WILLY CROSSING OVER TO THE RAINBOW BRIDGE AND THESE ANNIVERSARIES ARE HELL. I FEEL VERY CONCERNED FOR YOU WHEN IT COMES TO THAT ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY. PLEASE KNOW YOU'RE IN MY PRAYERS. IT IS GREAT TO HEAR HOW WELL LILY IS DOING AND CHILLY MAY JUST BE PLAYING A PART IN THAT. BUT, I'LL BET YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT.

I SURE DO REMEMBER ABOUT THE JOHN W FELLOW. DO YOU RECALL I TOLD YOU THAT ALL I COULD SEE WAS A TALL, QUIET MAN WHO IS GOOD AND THAT I FELT THAT I WAS PROBABLY CHANNELING JOHN WAYNE? LOOKS LIKE I WAS RIGHT. ARG. I'M SO SORRY HE PLAYED YOU FOR A FOOL BUT YOU GOTTA STOP BEING SO NICE. YEAHHH RIGHTTT. JUST LIKE I GOTTA STOP BEING SO NICE. HEY, THAT'S HOW WE ARE, WHAT WE DO AND "PEOPLE CAN BE SO CRUEL. THEY'LL USE YOU AND ABUSE YOU. THEY'LL TAKE YOUR SOUL IF YOU LET THEM. JUST DON'T YOU LET THEM." YOU KNOW WHAT SONG THAT'S FROM. RIGHT? BUBBA, YOU STAY JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! AS FOR THE JOHN W GUY: "INSTANT KARMA'S GONNA GET HIM." YOU BETCHA.

OH, I JUST LOVE SOME OF THE EXPRESSIONS I'VE PICKED UP HERE AND THERE. "YEAH RIGHT AND MY A$$ IS A BANJO" IS ONE OF MY FAVS. LOL! ANOTHER ONE IS TO RESPOND TO SOMEONE USING AN INTERESTED EXPRESSION AS YOU SAY "TRY TO IMAGINE" ... THEN SHORT PAUSE. CHANGE YOUR FACE AND BODY LANGUAGE AND FINISH ... "HOW LITTLE I CARE." OMG I AM SO BAD! HAHAHA!!!

WELL, I'VE BEEN FEELING PRETTY GOSH DARNED UPSET AND I SUPPOSE ONE COULD SAY ANGRY FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS. ON JULY 8TH, I CALLED THE NONEMERGENCY POLICE TO GO AHEAD AND FILE FORMAL CHARGES AGAINST THOSE THREE ARSES FOR STEALING MY HOME BLIND, STEALING MY PETS AND TRYING TO HAVE MY DOG AND CAT KILLED AND GAWD ONLY KNOWS WHAT THEY DID TO ALEX. THE FIRST FEMALE OFFICER WAS KIND. SHE TRANSFERRED ME TO A SECOND FEMALE OFFICER WHO WAS VERY UNKIND. LONG STORY SHORT, I FINALLY TOLD THAT SECOND PMS COP, "SO LET ME SEE IF I'M HEARING YOU CORRECTLY. IT'S OKAY THAT THOSE THREE TRESPASSED UNWELCOME INSIDE MY HOME STOLE OVER $12,000 OF STUFF AND I CAUGHT THEM IN THE ACT, COMMITTED SEVERAL MISDEMEANORS, AT LEAST 1 FELONY, COMMITTED ANIMAL ABUSE ..." I WENT ON AND ON. HER REPLY WAS SOMETHING TO THE EFFECT OF ... "YEP."

HEY, I HAD GONE INTO BIG TIME DETAIL WITH THAT COP HOW THE THREE KNEW WHERE I WAS STAYING DURING THE HOUSE TENTING, HAD MY CONTACT NUMBERS, THE HOTEL WAS LESS THAN 15 MINUTES AWAY SO ONE OF THEM COULD EASILY DRIVE OVER TO SEE ME REAL FAST AND NICO DID JUST THAT ON OCT 12TH WHICH IS ACTUALLY THE FIRST TIME I EVER MET HIM IN PERSON. ANYWAY, IT'S MY HOME AND MY RESPONSIBILITY TO REMOVE ANY FOOD STUFF BEFORE HASKELL FUMIGATION COMPANY WOULD LET ME BACK INSIDE ... IF THAT'S EVEN TRUE. DANG, THEY STOLE TONS OF STUFF WHICH IS NOT FOOD RELATED IN THE LEAST.

LIKE I SAID, I FEEL TICKED OFF GOOD AND PROPER SO AM NOT GIVING UP. THEY WILL PAY DEARLY FOR WHAT THEY DID TO MY FUR AND FEATHER KIDS. TOO BAD I GOTTA PLAY THE HOUSE ROBBERY CARD CUZ THAT'S JUST STUFF AND I DON'T CARE. ANY PORT IN A STORM THOUGH. HEH. PLUS, I GOT A WHOLE LOT OF OTHER DIRT ON NICO PAVAN AND JULIA GALPIN SO I'LL USE THAT, TOO. AS DAVID BANNER CALMLY SAYS IN THE OLD INCREDIBLE HULK TV SERIES, "DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY. YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME WHEN I'M ANGRY." I LOVE THAT ONE, TOO.

HERE I GO ...



THAT'LL LEARN 'EM DERN EM. DANG SKIPPY.

TAKE CARE, BUBBA. KEEP ME POSTED WHEN YOU'RE ABLE AND I'LL DO THE SAME. BIG HUGS TO YOU, YOUR DEAR WIFE, CHILLY, LILY AND OF COURSE WILLY!!!

ALWAYS,
DOTTIE xoxoxox

PS. BUBBA, YA EVER SEEN A WET BULLDOG SHAKING OFF WATER ...

IN SLOW MOTION ... SO KEWL!!! PLEASE CLICK ON THE PHOTO ...



I LOVE IT!!! MORE HUGS TO ALL YOUZE GUYZE!!!

My Dearest Baby Boy Alex,

It's been a while since I spoke with you here. But, I think about you so much that I sometimes forget to breathe. Looking up into the beautiful night sky takes on a whole new meaning since you crossed over. Please don't think of the sky as sadness, sorrow or grief because it is blue. Give that lovely color a whole new different meaning ...

Blue, to me, is not cold, distant or uncaring. Blue is floating, unrestrained and without fear ... Reaching for the sky and beyond ... Stretching unbridled to gently pluck from the Heavens the furthest star. Feel the blue of its brilliance. Feel the blue!

Alex, you are that one, unique, brilliant star that keeps burning so brightly!


And, you'd best believe I'll continue to "tell your story" so others will know how amazing you were in all you said and did. My hope and prayer is that everyone I speak with and share things about you ... That they will tell a friend then their friend will tell someone else who in turn will tell others so you will be spoken of fondly, lovingly and humorously for ages to come as your "story" passes from one generation to the next for all time!

I do listen and can hear you call out across the clear blue night sky. Oh, how I pray that others can hear you too, my most Cherished, Immortal Beloved Feather Child.

Sweet Alex, you can always reach out and touch me. I know in my heart and soul you'll always be with me until eternity passes away. Please know that I'll never leave you either. Time can indeed be transcended and you're always here with me!

I Love You And Miss You So Much!!!





Always Your Loving Mama, Dottie xoxoxoxoxox

soooo beautiful

{{{{{ELAINE}}}}} Thank you so very much!!! The part I wrote about feeling the blue is an exert from one of the many poems which I compose. I feel so honored that it touched your heart!!!



Many Comforting Hugs and Angels to You and your Precious Fur Child!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

No, I haven't forgotten you, Sweet Baby Boy Alex. How could I? It just ain't possible. Well, from where you are, you know that I've been here many times to read and try to post words of comfort to others. But, as the song goes, "The Tears Get In My Way." And, I start to ... You know ...

Very soon, I'll be fostering a baby green cheeked conure (or green cheek conure - both are correct) who needs my care. Perhaps you'll pay a visit and give me a hand ... Or foot ...

Oh Gawd, so much more I want to say. I just can't. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, Alex!

Here, I made this and some other images just for you, Precious Alex. Of course, anyone here please feel free to use any images I make and post. Put them anywhere you wish. That honors both me and Alex and I'm sure he'd make his "Happy Sounds" for all to hear if he were able. I hope you like this one, my Beloved Feather Child.



See the bird at the bottom of the stairway to The Rainbow Bridge? I brought you another future friend, my baby boy. And, at the top of the stairs, I put golden, shimmering Angel's wings with our two hearts together as we shall be on That One Sweet Day.

I Love You and Miss You So Much!!!
You know you are and will always be my Mostest Bestest Friend Ever!

Always Your Loving Mama, Dottie xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Dear Dottie,

Thank you for the wonderful pictures of Patches and for the candles you lit for him. I am sure he and Alex are enjoying themselves in heaven together especially with Alex riding on Patches back while walking with Jesus in paradise. They will be friends forever and enjoying eachothers company.

God Bless You Always,

James-Patches Dad

Oh My Goodness! Hello there, James-Patches Dad! I'm so glad you came here. Bless You!

I've written you an e-mail and a "PS" email to show you a test image. You'll read and then know all about what I'm saying. I'm still feeling so very surprised, honored and humbled ... Like I said, It's all in the email. God Bless You and Patches Most Abundanty!!!

Funny you should talk about Patches treating Alex to all those piggy back rides because I mention that in my email to you and had not yet seen this. I'll be in touch and thank you so very much!

Big Hugs to You and Lotsa Pats, Hugs and Kisses to Fur Angel Patches!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

My Most Beloved Feather Child Alex, tomorrow begins our second Angelversary. The last time I saw you, kissed you and ... Well, it's the last day I ever saw your precious self, Sweet Baby Boy. I'll try my very best to come back tomorrow, but just in case, don't you feel it would be oh so lovely to go "Walking in the Air" ... Right now? Let's you and I do that. Okay? Here we go!







"Walking in the Air"

We're Walking in the Air ... Floating in the Sky ...
Floating in the Air ...

We're walking in the Air
We're floating in the moonlit Sky
The people far below are sleeping as we Fly

We're holding very tight
I'm riding in the midnight blue
I'm finding I can Fly so high above with you!

Far across the world
The villages go by like dreams
The rivers and the hills
The forests and the streams

Children gaze open mouth
Taken by surprise
Nobody down below believes their eyes!

We're surfing in the Air
We're swimming in the frozen sky
We're drifting over icy
Mountains floating by

Suddenly swooping low on an ocean deep
Arousing of a mighty monster from its sleep!

We're walking in the Air
We're dancing in the midnight sky
And everyone who sees us greets us as we Fly!





Mama's blowing Many, Many Kisses to You, My Angel Feather Child Baby Boy!

I Love You and Miss You So Much!!!

Eternally, Your Loving Mama Dottie xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Hello to whomever may be reading this. Bless You and your Most Immortal Beloved Angel Fur and/or Feathered Angel Babies.

First of all, for those new members who have not read my past posts, please know that I simply cannot, cannot, cannot bear to be pitied in any way, shape nor form and don't even take to people expressing genuine sympathy very well unless it's something to the effect of, "Dang! What a bummer! That really bites, dudette! Man, like I said: Major Bummer, Kiddo." Now, that I can cope with. That having been said, I shall continue ...

Just think of me speaking in the tone, manner and expressions of Joe Friday from the old Dragnet TV show series. Honest: "Just the facts, Ma'am" ... You know what I'm saying. Okay, in my Joe Friday persona, I wish to share because I have absolutely no one else to turn to and feel the need to talk. Okay? But! Remember, no pity party. Please? Thank so much! Here goes ...

Alex was my heart, soul, world, everything and the last time I saw him was October 11, 2007. Kissed, snuggled, conversed. Yes, he knew the meanings of every word and phrase in his huge vocabulary with the exception of one "play phrase" which I just don't see how he'd know what it meant. I could very well be wrong, but I don't think so. Hmmm? Put it this way, I'd be surprised as heck if he knew the meaning of: "Be a duck! Be a Duck! Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack!" Shrug. He did figure a whole lot out on his own though ... From TV, the PC, listening and observing other people, so forth and so on.

According to experts who did not know him nor me, Alex had the cognizance (memory, recognition, reasoning. comprehension, vocalizations), emotions, behavior, personality and so on just the same as a "3 to 4 year old 'normal' human child." Dang! He'd have amazed, astounded and astonished you carrying on simple conversations with him ...

There's more and please, please, please ... Remember NO pity. Thank you all for that and Hugs!!!

Yeah, I'm mostly housebound as a "disabled" dudette and the PC is pretty much my window to the outside world. Beginning each morning with Alex: "Wake up! Wake up!" ... All day long he'd sit on my right shoulder watching videos on the PC, "helping me" create images, had his favorite TV shows, yada, yada, yada ...

Ummm, I think I'll have to come back and continue and I'll bet you can guess why ...

I wish to make a selfish request. Please hold me (and Alex) close in your thoughts and/or prayers as I relive the guilt ... I could have stopped what happened! I need to know how to forgive myself and pray to God that Alex forgives me. I could have stopped all this from happening!

Alex, I'm sorry! I'm so, so, so very sorry!!! He had such a kind and gentle mind and soul. Unfortunately very loving, friendly and TRUSTING. I failed him. Alex, I am SO Very Sorry!!!

Ummm ... Well, that's "Just the facts" and I'd sure appreciate it so very, very much if you'd kindly send me and Alex some positive vibes or thoughts or prayers ... Or all I just mentioned and ...

Dear Loving God, please send Angels to soothe and gently guide both myself and my Most Cherished Feather Child Angel Baby Boy Alex beginning tomorrow through October 16th: That devastatingly fateful day. Thank you, God! Amen.

Gotta go now. October 16th is the gosh awful day and ...

That's all for now. More later hopefully. Thank you all so very, very much for your awesome support to me! Hugs! Sorry that I can't keep that "happy face" right now ...

God Bless You and Your Angel Fur and Feather Babies Most Abundantly and Eternally!!!

Later ... Bye for now ...

Always,
Angel - Dottie xoxoxox

PS. Many thanks also to everyone for letting me talk. More Hugs!!!

And Alex, mere words cannot even begin to describe how I feel that "The Plans They Made Put an End to You." I beg your forgiveness! Mama Loves You and Misses You So Much!!! Lord, please help me to stop being haunted by this song. Thank you and Amen.

Hi, Sweet Baby Boy Alex. I pulled myself up by the boot straps and got here to begin our five day Angelversary year two. You're always on my mind, in my thoughts, my heart and my very soul. So, I just had to do something really special.

This is a song I've never heard before, but it pays Tribute in Loving Memory to a family's parrot who crossed over to The Rainbow Bridge. Guess what? Her name is Angel. Isn't that something? Please say hi to her for me. Okay? Okay!

I chose and enhanced this image adding all the flashing lights which, to me, look a lot like tiny fireflies, fairies and even Angels. See the expression on the Vale Fairy's face? That's me smiling and thinking about you, Precious One. These lyrics are truly perfect and speak my feelings exactly. I pray you enjoy, my Darling Feather Child. Kisses!!!








"Here Without You"

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face.
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same.

But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face ...

I'm here without you Baby
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you Baby
And I dream about you all the time!

I'm here without you Baby
But you're still with me in my dreams.

And tonight, it's only you and me ...

The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello.
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go.

I'm here without you Baby
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you Baby
And I dream about you all the time.
I'm here without you Baby ...

But you're still with me in my dreams!

And tonight Boy, its only you and me ...

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard, but it wont take away my Love!
And when the last one falls
When it's all said and done
It gets hard, but it wont take away my Love!

I'm here without you Baby
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you Baby.

And I dream about you all the time ...

I'm here without you Baby
But you're still with me in my dreams ...

And tonight Boy, its only you and me!






Eternally, Your Loving Mama Dottie xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Hi, Sweet Alex. I've come to visit you at The Rainbow Bridge so I can sing you a song. You loved watching Space Jam with Michael Jordan, Bugs Bunny and all the gang. And you loved this song oodles, too. From my very heart and soul to you, my precious baby boy.

Hi Dottie, Hi Mommy,

Alex and I worked hard to put this picture together for you. We hope you like it.

Love, Patches & Alex

Thank You Patches and Alex!!!

It's Beautiful!!!

Hugs and Kisses To Patches and Alex!!!

I Love You Two!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox