Ut oh. Okay, I've not slept but a tiny bit for the past few days as I've been doing the "count down" to those 3 one year anniversaries. I don't feel sleepy. Don't need the sleep. Do rest on occasion but ... I have been doing that "count down" thing. In about 5 and 1/2 hours, it will be the exact time marking the October 11, 2007 anniversary of event number one regarding Alex and I'm feeling some panic. Feeling a bit freaked out. What I'm saying is that I hope to gawd I don't lose it, start screaming bloody murder and crying really loud and hysterically like I did a year ago.

Hmmm? Maybe I can meditate myself to sleep? I dunno. Well, even if I do that, then when I wake up it will either still be before the exact moment when I last saw Alex or right after or an hour or two hours ... What I'm saying is that it will be the same day.

Where's Bubba? I need a slurpee. Oy.

PS. Oh crap. I'm trembling. Errr ... Maybe I need some food. I'll try that. Okay, I'm done now. Bye, bye.

Well, I just had it out with my brother again about a half hour ago but I'm not shouting or cursing or anything at all here so poor Buddy dog and Styx kitty are fine and happy. Whewww! I just sooooo love, love, love it when I express a crisis event regarding my loss of Alex or my loss of anyone human or animal then he goes into one of his "Mr. Philosophical" routines about "Letting go." I want to smack him silly. I am serious. I would just love to pull his ear until he screams and perhaps even knee him in his family jewels. OMG! I did not say that. I want to say that but I did NOT say that. Okay, I'm done again for now. Bye bye.

PS. I would send him two articles to read if I thought he'd read them but I truly believe he doesn't "get it." There are so very, very, very many different things that factor into why someone feels a particular way about one loss and not about another. Shall I just send him a sign to wear instead? You know, one that says, "I am Stupid!" Sounds like a plan to me cuz dang. We're talking about an extremely well educated and well read person here. He is tremendously bright and above average intelligence. He's just ... Never mind. It ain't worth my breath.

PS. PS. Heck, I'm stupid for even having called him since I had to have known what was coming. But, I did tell him before I spoke that I only wished to speak, be heard, to vent and him say nothing. He agreed but I guess he couldn't resist his "Institute for Rational Living" philosophizing. Okay, that does it. I am gonna slap the snot out of him next time I see him. Word. Heh.

Hey Dottie

Yes - I am familiar with the "letting go" routine - like they are discounting your feelings. I think "acceptance" of what is is the only thing I can even consider and even that is difficult. Letting go - of our babies? Like when I was told that I "talked an awful lot" about what might have happened to Zita. So let's say my H has gone missing or my stepdaughter - ah well, just let it go... why talk about it.

I pm'd you several times but don't think they are going thru.

For anyone dealing with ptsd there is a forum - http://www.ptsdsite.com/cgi-bin/gforum/gforum.cgi

Thinking of you and sending all healing thoughts to you and to Alex...

Jan.

{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} I don't know what's going on because I've gotten at least 3 PMs since the last time you said you sent me a couple and yours aren't there. I wonder if I missed them and they are there? I'll go check after I finish writing to you here. Oh, thanks so much for that link, Jan! Tres bien et merci beaucoup!

As for Tony, I did send him an email. Nope, no ranting. Nothing like that. I'd love, love, love to share part of it here. Ha. For one thing, me thinks his edumakahsun lernin' am selective. Know what I mean? Also, regarding his edumakashun, he shore as heck don't praktise whut he preechuz. Heh. Oh, that includes the letting go of loss when I say he don't practice what he preaches. Yep. "Analyze that, Bro." Ooo I do wanna smack him into next week. Arg.

Love you Sooo Much Jan!!! Tons of Hugs and Angels!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

I'm gonna talk with myself some more just to put down some feelings. If anyone reads this and wants to comment that's fine by me but what I honest and for true am doing is just venting to myself. Getting it down here where it should be. Thanks.

Okay then. In October of 2007 when all the townhouse units (18 ... Three buildings of 6 units each) were planned to be tented by Haskell's for termite fumigation, I had automatically "assumed" that I'd be spending those 2 days and nights at my brother's house along with Buddy dog, Styx kitty and Alex parrot. Hey, I've stayed at his house before a few times. That was "before" though. When I was younger, beautiful, cooking for and entertaining his big wig guests. Yep. "Before." Tony has a very spacious house with a large fenced in back yard. Buddy is house trained and has never made a boo boo. Tony is the one who gifted Styx kitty to me years ago and loved his last kitty Silver so much. Yada, yada, yada ...

So, I phoned my brother to make arrangements to stay with him for those two nights and before I even brought that up Tony said, and these are his exact words, "You know you can't stay here, right?" His voice was dear and pleasant when he said it. The very moment those words came out of his mouth, I was suddenly struck with an episode of irritable bowel syndrome and almost didn't make it to the bathroom. Tony said those words and my immediate and very honest response was: "Oh My God! I have to go to the bathroom right now or I won't make it. Bye!"

To this day, Tony doesn't know why I suddenly got sick and had to rush to the bathroom. As far as he's concerned, it just hit me and I had to go. No problem. I do know the reasons why Tony didn't want me to stay at his house. Now, those reasons are hurtful to me. A couple days later while talking with Tony on the phone, he was still pleasant when I told him where I'd be staying. He lied to me as to the reasons why I could not stay at his house. Shame on him. So then I felt not only hurt but also annoyed but no anger at all. None. I did not call him on his fib, was nice to him and let it go.

Long story short, too late! If I had stayed for those two days (48 hours give or take) at my brother's house with Buddy dog, Styx kitty and Alex parrot. NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE EVER HAPPENED. NONE OF IT. I would still have Alex, nothing would have been done to Buddy dog nor Styx kitty and I would never had to have met the two female monsters nor come into any contact with them at all.

I ... Have ... Never ... Told ... This ... To ... Tony. Never have I brought this up to him. Do I or have I ever felt angry toward Tony or that it's his fault regarding what happened to my fur and feather kids all because he did not want me at his house for those two days? No. Not even for a moment. Why is that? Well, the way I see it is that Tony didn't do anything to my doggie, kitty nor parrot to cause them any harm. He didn't kidnap and/or murder them. And, he'd never, ever harm them. He was NOT responsible for what those monsters did and that is why I have never felt any kind of bad feelings toward my brother for not wanting me at his house except for the hurtful feelings regarding the reasons part. Still, no blame to him from me. Besides, it is HIS house. He can pick and chose who he lets in the door or not. Honestly. That is exactly how I feel. Shrug.

As far as ever bringing this up to Tony, I would never do it. He may either feel guilty, or most likely he would not feel guilty and THAT would tick me off. I mean, if I did nicely bring it up and he got all snotty and defensive to me, then I would feel more than annoyed with him but still no rage whatsoever. None. Word.

There's more: Not too long ago, I heard from our shared house cleaner Audrey what Tony said about "that bird." I also found out what he's been telling mutual friends about me so I did verify it but I did NOT tell them that he was fibbing. Why the heck is he telling these people those things about me? Then there's the hurtful "gossip" type stuff that he tells them about me. Some true and some or most not true. What is that about?

Getting back to the remark he made about "that bird" when referring to Alex, because of that I do feel tempted to send him a very kind and polite "What If" type of email ... Sort of just imagine if I had stayed at his house with my pets then none of this would have happened, nothing to my pets and my home would not have been robbed blind by those three monsters.

A Thought: I wonder if this has ever occurred to Tony about how none of this would have happened had I stayed at his house those two days. And, if it has occurred to him, does he feel any remorse?

That's all for now. I may come back and edit in more later. Thanks and Hugs!

Oh the what if's Dottie, how we can torture ourselves (and others) with those! There are certain what if's that are very hard to accept though - like why did the vet not do the exploratory surgery necessary when I told her that Ziggy had likely been shot by an airgun. And why did I not ask more questions about what was actually done. I had physical symptoms telling me that Ziggy's bowel had a major problem - and it was - I thought the vet had done everything she could, and she hadn't. I was in Seattle with my sick niece while Ziggy was dying, after the vet said her prognosis was good as long as we kept her on antibiotics, which we did. If I'd been here might I have realized more deeply that something more was needed? But my husband kept a close watch and was in touch with our own vet. I can go over and over things in my head. But it doesn't bring her back.

Like many here, I am finding it's been weeks since Ziggy is gone and I still cannot believe it and the emotions are just as intense and fresh. I still keep thinking she will be there on the bed, in my office, on her chair. The spark and joy in my life that left with Zita, and was slowly regained with Ziggy has been snuffed out.

I do not know what really to do with these feelings, except feel them. The only thing that seems a bit different is that my appetite seems to be getting a bit more normal. The other thing is that today I looked at cats online, and though knowing full well I cannot adopt again at this time, I could "imagine" another sweet soul in my life. Never, never to replace Zita or Ziggy, that will never happen. It is just the desire to give and receive love with another healing kitty one day. I do not know if that will ever happen or if such a kitty even exists. Certainly it will not happen now, with a $1400 credit card bill for a dead Ziggy and with all the concerns of this neighbourhood. No, Ziggy was a wonderful stroke of luck, and yet I do wonder how her life might have been better if she'd been adopted by someone else instead of me. Like I said - it's so easy to go back and question every little thing, every detail. So many things went exactly wrong that Ziggy ended up dead.

It's almost a year for me also since Zita went missing - the last day I saw her was October 20th. I always thought the only positive thing about her disappearance was the fact that we got Ziggy. Now of course, I question that too.

I do know I was privileged to know those two sweet souls for as short a time as I did. Were they so privileged to end up in my life, well that is one of the biggest questions, knowing that my "care" resulted in their demise.

Not a cheery response, Dottie, but letting you know I am there with you.

Jan.

Oh, Dottie, how that's got to hurt. You must be a really strong person to not beat the crap out of him. It's ok to do that, you know, your siblings. I can certainly understand now about all your what ifs. I keep saying over and over, there's got to be a reason for all this. I cannot speak for you, but if was me I wouldn't talk to him about your feelings, he obviously doesn't seem interested in how you feel about your pets. It's certainly hard when you need a shoulder to cry on and it gets turned away. It won't happen here, post away.. Hugs.. Ann

{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} I hope you don't mind. When I quoted you above, I then inserted numbers as in 1. and 2. and 3. and so on. That makes it easier for me to respond to each thing, thought, comment or point you've shared. Okay and HUGS!!!

1. Jan, not only was this a major, big time emergency but also you were in major shock, of course you didn't think to ask those questions. It would have taken a Mr. Spock (you know, one so logical, rational, no emotions when a huge crisis is occurring RIGHT NOW) ... A Mr. Spock may have been able to pose many of those questions as in exploratory surgery to the vet as well as telling the vet that all which was done "was not sufficient" due to Ziggy's bowels having a major problem and so on. But you ain't Mr. Spock and you ain't Data (his name) that's is the humanoid robot from Star Trek Generations and also handles crises in a most logical, rational manner since no emotions are involved.

Please pardon my language but we are too da*med human, do have emotions especially when such a very tragic event takes place and something MUST be done quick, fast and in a hurry ... At least in the beginning. I hope that made sense. Hon, I am different from you but I also would not have thought to ask any of those questions, would not have thought about the bowel problem being a factor and, being as stupid as I am (No! not you, hon. I'm saying Me!) ... Again, being as stupid or "ignorant" as I am, my thoughts would have been: "This is a professional Veterinary physician. I TRUST this Vet's expertise."
I could go on and on and on like the Ever Ready bunny and will be glad to tell you more but basically, there you have it.

So hell no! Not your fault in any manner for the reasons I've given above and will elaborate more if you wish, Dear One. HUGS!!!

2. Jan, you weren't there. You could only go by what you were being informed regarding progress. Again, you trusted that the Professional Veterinary Doctor was doing ALL what could be done. But look, Jan! You kept checking in. Do you know how few pet owners do that? You did! God Bless You!!!

3. Dayum! Please know that I either realize exactly what you're talking about or I sure do relate. I am there right now, too. Oy! Since you're aware my own "events" regarding my loss then I believe you do know that ... Yes! I do understand, empathize and am there myself and Dayum. Again, please forgive my language. Sorry, Hon. Still, Dayum!

4. That's what I do. I feel those feelings, too. It is good that you're appetite is coming back and I pray it stays that way. How odd (but not really) that you mentioned looking at cats online cuz I began doing that regarding birds about ... Errr ... Thinking. I do believe it was in July? Please don't hold me to that. Oh! And earlier on at a Parrot Rescue Website where they rescue parrots (and other animals and it's only about 5 minutes away from where I live - I saw an article about it in the news paper) ... Anyway, I looked. Looked at birds, their ages, life span expectancies, gender cuz I'd want a male pertaining to certain breeds, looked at cages cuz that monster Nico had not yet returned Alex's to me yet and I still cannot imagine using it again cuz Dayum! More, more, more ....

Jan, since I was a small child, birds of all breeds both outside or domesticated budgies, parrots, more, have had very significant meaning to me. It's my opinion that they are Angels. Almost literally. Also, I am fascinated because birds, all birds, are "present day dinosaurs." That's a fact and I can give you many links proving it. Fascinating! Oh, there are many more reasons. I have ALWAYS wanted to be a bird. To fly, go anywhere, experience those things that they do. More. More. More. Now you have a little clue as to what birds symbolize and mean to me ever since I can remember and as I grew to my present age of 54 years.

Then, I thought to myself, "What the freak am I doing?! Get another bird, parrot, budgie or even finch or canary?! I DON'T THINK SO?! Again, what the freak was I thinking?!" Jan, I do not ever, ever, ever wish to come into any contact with any birds again. Never. There is the exception of Rescue and Rehabilitation then either release or to find them a loving home depending upon the breed of bird. But that is all. Period. Otherwise, and I know I'm being redundant: No More Birds as Feather Children for Me! Cuz I just do NOT ever, ever, ever want to go through any of this type of stuff again. Never.

However, and this is a HUGE, HUGE However: How very unfortunate for that bird out there to be robbed or deprived of the most loving, patient, caring, devoted Mama he/she could ever, ever dream of possibly having ... For all the reasons I've mentioned about what birds mean to me .... AND! Does the same apply to you about feline fur babies? That's a rhetorical question and you, of course, need not respond but it sure is food for thought, now ain't it? Yes, indeed it is.

5. Please read my number 6. response again. Honest and for true, Hon. HUGS!!!

6. Which also brings us back to number 1. In your Quote ... Jan, you do NOT have to pay that. I will need to ask a few questions and since we're having PM problems, I would need to do that here. Again, NO! You do not have to pay that Vet. Shall I go into as the reasons why? It has to do with what I read in your own thread some time ago and it's a blessing and a curse both that I have practically total recall. Shall we discuss how you owe that Vet not one red cent? And, I will tell you just how to go about it, Dear One!

7. Jan, I hope what I'm about to say makes sense to you as to the why you adopted Ziggy and that Ziggy was far better having you as a Mommy than any other person on earth. Here goes: Everything is exactly as it should be. The proof is because that is the way it is. If anything was supposed to be someway other than it is, then it would be that way and not the way it is. But that ain't how it is cuz it is the way it is (everything) which is again proof that all is how it's supposed to be.

I hope that made sense. If not, please ask and I'll elaborate.

8. {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} October 20th? You too. More Huge Big Tight Comforting Hugs!!!

9. Jan. Dear. Refer again to my responses of Number 1. And Number 2. Also you said: "I do know I was privileged to know those two sweet souls for as short a time as I did." Errr, Jan. So were they in regard to having YOU as their mommy. Word!

10. Hey, don't you worry about any cheery responses, We are here to share, care and we all benefit.
All of us!

Love You so Much and Tons of Comforting HUGS and ANGELS!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

{{{{{{{Ann}}}}}}} I agree with you completely regarding me never mentioning to Tony how nothing would have happened had he allowed me to stay at his home as we always did in the past for reasons like the house being tented. The reasons being that I honest to God and for true feel no anger toward him and do not blame him about what happened to Buddy, Styx and Alex since I had to stay at that hotel and not Tony's house. I gave the reasons why and hand to my heart, I am being perfectly honest. Also, It would only lead to what I call "agramony" between me and my brother which I can certainly do without. Oy Vey.

Well, I ain't slapped the snot out of him yet but it is on my "to do" list for the other things I mentioned cuz Dang! He may or may not have stopped spinning yarns and telling them unkind things about me since I did send him an email about a month ago or so when I busted him on it. Ha! Don't he know yet that, "Loose lips sink ships?" They shore do. Heh!

I also did send him an email yesterday explaining that "you are so stoopid for one as brilliant as yourself." Further, I told him that there are very, very many things that factor in as to why one given individual reacts with such trauma to one loss yet almost no trauma at all regarding similar losses. Here, I even did the *Humming the theme song to the Jeopardy game TV show.* thing. LOL!

I gave examples and asked him if he wanted to know any of those factors, that if he didn't care to know that I don't want to waste my fingers typing and waste his time deleting what I send to him.

So, he responded how I was so right that his letting go philosophy is flawed. It's best to suffer daily in ... I can't remember the exact words but something like "wallow the pain" and yada, yada, yada. Then Tony went onto telling me AGAIN regarding the woes he suffers each and every day of his life and has for the past 38 years ... ALL of which are easily curable if he'd do just ONE simple thing and I and every shrink he's ever seen has told him. Sooo many times over the years. Tony then said for me to, "You just keep on Celebrating your anniversaries. At least they only happen once a year, His happen every single freaking day!!!"
He then said: "You are a Very Lucky Lady!!! God Bless You!!!"

Oh, there were a couple more curse words or three in his email. Heh. And here is my response to which he has said nothing:

"Hey, let's criticize things we don't know about. I just love it when that happens. Tony, you ain't got a clue to that which I experience every single day of my life. Day in, day out, day in, day out. And why is that? Because I do not tell you. I do not tell anyone. Oh, and God Bless You, Too!!!"

OMG! I am so bad. Honest, but so bad.

Love You Sooooo Much, Ann!!! Tons and Tons of Hugs and Love!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hey Dottie---------Sometimes I get weary of the let go thing.Very 70's psychobabble.Yea I suppose we can't cling but it dosen't mean we forget!!!!!!!!!!!
If we forget our guard is let down and,well,seems like good people get taken advantage of.Always have always will.
Slurpee on the way(maybe with a little Gran Mariner to help with the nerves)...........Bubba,,,,,,

{{{{{{{Bubba}}}}}}} You are so right. But not right at the same time. A sort of "Catch 22" type thing. Oy.

Thanks for the slurpee with a touch of Gran Mariner. Yum! *Hiccup* Oops. 'Scuse me. *Blush*

Hey, I only just signed back on again, read your post, then saw you'd responded here.

I need to shut down my PC, come back up and run a few "crap cleaning" programs cuz this poor contraption is so overworked and it's a piece 'o crap on top 'o that. Heh. Then, I'm on my way back to your thread again. It should be about between 10 to 15 minutes before I get back and I ain't got no idea how long it will be for me to type out what I wanna say to you after having read your last post at your Shooting Star thread. So, gimme about 25 minutes totaled or so. Thanks and Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Alex! I came to play one of your favorite songs from one of your favorite scenes in the movie Labyrinth with David Bowie. Oh how you would Laugh and make your Happy Sounds! It was so cute whenever David would sing the word Baby and you would repeat him and even say "Hello Baby" using your sexy voice. Also your "Baby! Baby! Baby! I'm a Baby! Pretty Baby! Baby! Baby!" Man you really got into this one. I hope you enjoy and like the images I made just for you My Sweet Baby!

Dottie

I didn't see your message until this evening and oh... what can I say Dottie. You are such a special person!

I have felt like bawling all day but can't show it 'cause hubby thinks I'm off my rocker and this just proves the point. Then reading your post, well it's so comforting and best of all that you really understand. I cried my eyes out (in the bathroom where no-one can see me) but I so needed to do that.

I have lots to say but I can't talk like right now but will be back.

Just a couple of things. Have you tried pming me? 'Cause mine just haven't gone thru, but if you can pm me I can give you my email address if I am able to respond that is.. it seemed to work before, I wonder if I am pm the wrong person or something...

Also I have already paid through visa for the vet. The visa people said that they couldn't refund even though what we asked for was not actually what was performed. The vet however didn't explain what she meant by "exploratory surgery" and offered no other options or quotes for any other possible types of surgery. In fact she expressed there was no need for anything because the organs looked good on the x-ray and the bloodwork was good. So obviously a severed bowel cannot be detected on an x-ray. But I am putting in a complaint to the Canadian Vet Association. It is so stressful to write this down - I also can't stand the thought of going in to that vet for any records, not sure if I will have to. Anyway, another story but it sickens me, the whole thing.



Wow, Dottie that is just so cool. I never thought of birds this way, but it's true they are angels - pure souls, like our dogs, cats, rats, ferrets etc - but they even have wings. I've always been fascinated that a bird could actually bond with a human. I saw a program once where a women had an amazing love bond with chickens - I think because of how we live most humans cut ourselves off from this amazing connection. And the dinosaur connection, I have heard that too - so interesting.



Thank you for that perspective - really thank you so much. I think that is why Ziggy was special to me. Her fur was dull and she had spent most of her time at the SPCA in a small cage since for some reason her spay was postponed. I thought of how little and unloved she looked in there and how much she loved and appreciated our home. I have never seen a cat show so much gratitude. She "came out" of herself and was the big personality she was always meant to be in our home. I know I will not have a Ziggy or a Zita again. My heart has no room right now to be broken again, and I know our 17 yr old Rosie dog is coming close to the end also. But these are the big questions about cats or birds in need - and I put those questions back to you because I know there is a special bird out there - not Alex, of course not to replace or diminish him - but one that would so benefit from your care. And having said that I do know the hurt involved also.... oh do I ever having lost my "cat in need" as well. But this was so different than your cir%%stances.



Well amazingly simple, and it certainly does make sense. It takes away those "what ifs" doesn't it. Maybe in some other dimension we're living out the results of other choices but whatever we're experiencing here, now, however much it hurts and however much we would like to send it back. It is. It just is anyway.

Much more to say, but I have to run.

Lots of love Dottie and thanks a big bunch for your thoughtful response!
Jan

Hi {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} My eyes are a bit out of focus right now and so is my brain. Oy. I usually get that "pick me up" feeling in the evenings so can see and concentrate better. I promise to come back some time this evening to respond to you unless the electricity goes out or I drift off to sleep cuz I may try to escape what day this is. Oh, I sure do know that you know what I mean.
Oy Vey. Oy Vey. Oy Vey. That is a rare and triple Oy Vey. Arg.

I want you to know I see that you posted a response and I will be back, Dear One. Love You Soooo Much!!!

Big Tight Comforting Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Editing: Jan, what I mean is that our electricity in this part of town shuts down way more often than other parts of Tampa because of stuff like storms, someone messing with a breaker box way up on one of the lines, a car crashing into a post and out goes everyone's electricity and stuff like that. I just wanted to make sure you know it's not me and my bills are all paid up so I don't want you to worry.
I thought I'd better clarify about the electricity thing. More Hugs!!!

(((((((((((((((Dottie)))))))))))))))))

I know what day it is and I understand wanting to escape.

I hope you get a clear message about where Alex is and what really happened - I'm just putting it out there to those unseen to give you comfort and connect you with Alex again...

And also sending you peace with "what is", because, in your words - "if anything was supposed to be some way other than it is, then it would be that way and not the way it is."

Sending you love, healing and hope.

Jan.

Okay, thought I posted this, but I somehow didn't.

To you Dottie from Alex!
- Making the fonts bigger since your eyes are out of focus today. This song popped into my head this morning so maybe it was for you...?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Urv7tyeJ7qE


Here are the lyrics

Ordinary Miracle

It’s not that usual when everything is beautiful
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

The sky knows when its time to snow
You don’t need to teach a seed to grow
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

Life is like a gift they say
Wrapped up for you everyday
Open up and find a way
To give some of your own

Isn’t it remarkable?
Like every time a raindrop falls
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

Birds in winter have their fling
And always make it home by spring
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

When you wake up everyday
Please don’t throw your dreams away
Hold them close to your heart
Cause we are all a part
Of the ordinary miracle

Ordinary miracle
Do you want to see a miracle?

Its seems so exceptional
Things just work out after all
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

The sun comes up and shines so bright
It disappears again at night
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

It’s just another ordinary miracle today


And another link for you Dottie - wow I can see why Alex was so endearing...

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/395796/talking_quaker_parrot/

take care Dottie - thinking of you.

Jan.

Oh My Gosh {{{{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}}}}} What Beautiful Gifts you've brought me. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you so very much!!!

The song with what I believe to be scenes from Charlotte's Web is absolutely amazing! I don't recall seeing that movie but have seen the animated Charlotte's Web several times and never get tired of it. Love it so very much. I want Wilbur piggy. Can I ... I mean May I have him, please? I can? Thank you! I'm reminded of Grandma Brennan from my old neighborhood when I was a tiny thing growing up. Remember, this was not a rural area in nature. There were good sized yards for each home. Still it was a street with houses on each side, yada, yada, yada.

She wasn't my Grandma but everyone called her Grandma Brennan cuz she was grandma to all us kids. Well, she had a pet pig and that may have been a little before my time but I doubt it. It's just that I may have been a babe in arms at that point. Anyway, Grandma Brennan loved that pig so much. She'd put a collar on it and walk it up and down the block. Then the pig got bigger and bigger cuz it was a regular pig. Not a Pot bellied pig. Mean 'ol neighbors began to complain about her pig being so big. From what I can recall, Grandma Brennen's daughter told her she'd have to give away her pig. She lived with her daughter Earlene. I only wish I had been older when that happened cuz I'd have had a thing or two or ninety-seven things to say about that. I wanna slap some of those neighbors silly. Still do but I can't cuz they're dead but it's on my "To Do" list when I go to Heaven . . .

I will walk right up to them and say, "Oh Hi, Mr. Tiemann. Great to see you. Say, do you remember about Grandma Brennan's pet pig and why she had to let it go? Here take this." Wooossshhh! Smack him upside the head with one of my Angel wings. "Oh, Mr Tiemann. Remember what you did to Mildred Hinkle's pet squirrel, where you did it, why you did it and how you did it?" Wooossshhh! Wooossshhh! Wooossshhh! Smack that man literally to Kingdom Come for that one. But, he was a very dear, sweet, loving and wonderful man. Hand to my heart. I can't say as much about a couple other of the grown up female and a one or three of the male grown up male neighbors. Actually they were all wonderful people. They just did some bad things sometimes and really good things most of the time like all the rest of us.

I did get that nap and woke around 8:00 PM my time where I live. One thought came to me immediately. If Ann is reading this, it was in that same Vet Clinic where I volunteered and told you about the sweet, loving, friendly Doberman Pincher but won't say that fur kid's name or anything else about that fur kid at this time for reasons that will be obvious at least to Ann. Amazing, ain't it Ann? Same name and I told you all about it before ... You know. Before.

What came to my mind was another time in that Vet Clinic when a family brought in a cute as heck puppy who was having trouble breathing. I don't really know if anyone cares to hear about the rest that happened cuz it doesn't have a happy ending.

Then I came here and saw what you Gifted to me, Jan! OMG! Wonderful! Wonderful! Wonderful!!! I want to grab you and Hug you Sooo Biggg!!! Yeah, I'm having a very difficult time right now even though everything is the way it should be. Just like we talked about, Jan. My heart is racing and I can hear it beating in my right ear. Sounds to me like my blood pressure is up. I'm afraid to cry too hard or it may make me feel more physically ill than I already am or could put my health in jeopardy. Can't have that cuz I got plans to take down and rid the world of at least three very bad, bad, bad Monsters. Legally, of course. You know that. I could never physically hurt/harm or stand by and not help someone or animal who needed any kind of help even if it was one of them three Monsters. Why is that? I think it may be cuz I'm stoopid and dumb as dirt or something cuz Dayum! Hey, I ain't no Mother Teresa, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. or Mahatma Ghandi. I'm nice but not that nice so what the heck is my basic problem ... Oy and don't even answer cuz it's a rhetorical question. Still Oy Oy Oy I have got to be dumber than a bag of rocks. Sorry, no insult to the rocks.

Again, thank you! Thank you! Thank you so very, very much, Jan!!!

Tons of Hugs, Love, Peace, Hope and Many Angels!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Dottie

There's another version of the song with more piggie and other animated character shots. The intro is a bit weak but it gets better...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XP33Kn8RjRE


And more quaker birds for you if you haven't seen them already -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m35DG9RhqSk...feature=related

Plus an early Christmas song -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sy835onhOI...feature=related

And if you can get past the people who won't stop talking - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fq9Rh6KDCwE

or if you didn't think that was funny?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzPABxg3sS4&NR=1

There are tons of these on Youtube. You've probably seen many of them. Wow, what great birds - I have a new appreciation for them.

Wondering - do these birds long for the freedom of flying do you think? I don't know much about birds in captivity.

Thinking of you and hoping for more than an ordinary miracle for you and for Alex!!!!

Jan.

Oh My Gosh!!! {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} Thank you!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! I have not watched the videos yet because I want to make sure my PC will allow this to go through first. Yes, still PC problems but it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin' so I can't complain. It wouldn't do me any good to complain anyway. Heh. I promise, promise, promise that as soon as I send this that I will come back and hopefully my PC will allow me to view all these Wonderful, Wonderful Gifts from You! More Big Big Biiiggg Hugs!!!

This goes out for You, Alex, Everyone Here at LS, their Fur and Feather Babies and all the World over. For Hope, For Peace and I send Much Love!!!











Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

OMG! {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} My PC cooperated with me. So I had to sing this ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mw6H3crLzpg

Yep, I said, "Hallelujah! My overworked PC let me see all you Gifted me. Thank you so Very Very Much!!!"

Okay, that other clip with scenes from Charlotte's Web is even more amazing! So, I just have to see that movie. Then it hit me and I remembered something. Someone posted a Website on some message board that has thousands and thousands of movies. Many are older ones but some are practically new releases. Wow! Maybe that movie will be on that Website. Hey, they are all free! Go here ...

http://www.watch-movies.net/

See all the letters in the middle? Just to the left of all those letters of the alphabet it says Movie Titles. Click on the first letter of the first word in the movie title you're looking for. Once you get there, then go to your left and type in the name of the movie you're trying to find. For example, I clicked on the "C" at the first screen. At the second screen that popped up, I typed in "Charlotte's Web" and voila! OMG! There's only one and that's the one! Lookie ...

http://www.watch-movies.net/movies/charlottes_web/

For each movie, you have the option of watching it in 4 parts or the entire movie. I think I like the four parts option. Oh, the movie will not begin by itself. After you pull up the movie and it's on your screen, look to the left at the bottom and click that button to begin the movie and also to make it pause. Jan! I can't wait to watch Charlotte's Web! Thank you!!! Thank you so much!!!

That Quaker singing, "How much is that doggie in the window" ... Is So Adorable! Awwww!!! Big smile here!

Then ... Oh My Gosh! The Quaker singing Jingle Bells does know all the words including the "Ha ha ha" parts. It just needs a little more practice. Awww! So cute and smart!

Now, the Quaker with the woman and man talking ... That's a hybrid blue Quaker and Sooo cute! Apparently a juvenile. I'd say give or take one but no more than two years old. Wanna know why it doesn't want to talk but the others were singing like crazy in the other two videos? One does not take a cam corder and point it at a Quaker or most any other parrot and expect it to do its thing unless that parrot is very, very well trained and accustomed to that cam corder. They are shy and many times very frightened by cam corders or even it you walk past their cages carrying some unfamiliar object. True. Those other two were done with a cam corder type thingy already set up and pointed at the cage.

For example, this one may have a cam corder set up but mommy is there and that Quaker wants out. So obvious that anyone can tell. Still, its singing pretty well. Awww! Lookie ...

(Click Below) I'm Singing "Oh What a Beautiful Morning!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNQxnmRFa44

And these next two are what I'm talking about. They have a fixed set up which their mommy or daddy can turn on and leave the room to let their feather kids do their thing without any distractions. These are Great! Lookie ...

(Click Below) I'm Singing "If You're Happy and You Know it and You Really Wanna Show it Clap Your Hands!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvf-XpHX05k

(Click Below) I'm Singing "Supercallafagilistecexbeallidoshious! Even Though the Sound of it is Something Quite Atrocious!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8h_rO5CYQY

That last one of the Quaker laughing while sitting by a lovebird is hilarious! Alex's laugh sounded exactly like my big time laugh which was a riot and I kid you not! He loved to laugh for people. I remember when my late Kenny's mom was visiting us from Oklahoma and we were sitting in the living room. Kenny's mom was sitting in the recliner chair with her back to the cage where Alex was at the time. Well, mom let out a good laugh about something so Alex started laughing like crazy. I mean to tell you, he sounded exactly like me when I laugh hard and long. So, that made mom laugh all the more which made Alex laugh even louder and harder which made mom laugh even ... You get the picture. OMG! Hahaha!!! And, that's how Alex learned to say, "Shut up." Cuz mom finally started saying "Shut Up" while she was laughing. She said it several times and now you know how, when and why Alex learned how to say shut up. LOL!

Thanks so much for these Wonderful Gifts and Sweet Memories, Jan!!!

I wish to end by telling you this ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HecoP8WMY9E

And I mean it from the bottom of my Heart!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox