Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: How Do I Know If I'm Ready?
Lightning-Strike Pet Loss Support Forum > Pet Loss Support > New Beginnings
DonniesMom
I have posted in the Death and Dying forum about the loss of my beloved Labrador, Donnie. His death has left me heartbroken. Well it has been nearly 5 months since my baby passed away, and during that time I did some dog sitting for a friend of mine. So I had 2 boxers living with me for about 6 weeks. The male dog was a total sweetheart, and reminded us (my husband and I) of Donnie very much. Having him and his sister here for that time helped me heal quite a bit I think. I still miss Donnie terribly, but i really enjoyed taking care of them, and playing with then, and giving and receiving affection. Since they have moved back home with their owner, I have been feeling very lonely, and my husband i have been discussing adopting a new furbaby. How do i know if the time is really right? I know i haven't moved on since losing Donnie, and I'm not sure if i ever will, honestly. I have adjusted to life without him but my heart still aches very much. I miss being a mom to a dog. I have my cat Damien, who i adore, but I am a bit more of a dog person, maybe because dogs seem to be more dependent on me than cats do, and i really enjoy taking care of dogs. I feel badly for saying that, i love my kitty very much but its just how i feel. Damien seemed to enjoy having the dogs here too. I know he misses Donnie, they were the best of friends. How do I know if I am ready to have another dog? I know I will never replace my baby but I feel like I should open my heart again.
moon_beam
Hi, DonniesMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. You have asked the universal question that each of us ask when we are adjusting to the physical loss of a beloved companion. The only one who can answer that question is you. Some people adopt quickly after the loss of a companion, some people wait until their deep grief has eased a bit, some people do rescue and pet sitting for family members and friends for awhile, and some people - - for whatever reason - - never adopt again. Embracing a new companion into your heart and life is a very individual decision. Since you and your husband are now discussing the possibility together, this sounds like you both are coming to a mutual agreement of "one day" adopting a new companion(s). You don't have to rush into anything at this point - - but it sounds like you are ready to begin to keep your options opened. Just take one day at a time, DonniesMom -- your heart will guide you and you can never go wrong with that.

I hope today is treating you, your husband, and your precious Damien kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Donnie's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
DonniesMom
Well it has been over five months since my sweet Donnie left me. My heart still aches nonstop. But last week my husband and I brought home a new family member. We did this because, after much discussion, we felt that Donnie would not want us to do nothing but grieve and be heartbroken all the time. Which is just what we were doing. When he was alive, he could not stand to see us sad, and he would always try his hardest to make us smile. I know that he would want us to smile again even though he is no longer with us physically. So one day about two weeks ago, Donnie's dad and I decided to go to Petco so we could see some doggy faces. We were having a bad day and this always cheers us up. We happened to meet a beautiful shepherd mix boy who was so kind and sweet that he actually seemed to have Donnie's spirit. After discussing it for a week or so we decided it was time to give this boy a home. At first I was worried that Donnie would feel betrayed by this, but I quickly changed my mind. I believe that Donnie wants us to be happy, and he knows he will always be number one in my heart. I know I will always grieve for him and my heart will never be whole without him. But our new friend has given me hope. He is teaching me that it is okay to smile, to laugh, to look forward to getting up in the morning again. I know Donnie would want me to feel that way.
DonniesMom
We named him Hershey because he is so sweet to us. Damien really likes him a lot.
DonniesMom
Trying to upload a photo but it's not working sad.gif
DonniesMom
Hope this works
DonniesMom
Hope this works
moon_beam
Hi, DonniesMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing - - and CONGATULATIONS on your new family member Hershey. What a handsome fellow he is!!! And what wonderful news that your Damien and Hershey are already good friends. I know beyond all shadow of a doubt that your beloved Donnie is smiling with approval - - for I'm also very certain that he guided your and Hershey's paths to meeting and embracing one another. I am so happy for you, DonniesMom. May you, your husband, and your precious Hershey and Damien have a long and healthy and happy earthly journey together.

I hope today is treating you, your husband, and your precious Damien and Hershey kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Donnie's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
DonniesMom
As always, thank you moon beam! smile.gif I am very much enjoying my new friends company. As I type this, he is snuggled up between my husband and I, watching TV with us. He loves to give and receive affection. I am very glad I decided to open my heart to him, it has been worth it, and he has already been a big help in my grief journey. It's very hard to feel depressed with that smiling face looking at me all day. He truly is a blessing smile.gif
DonniesMom
I just wanted to post an update on my little family. We have had Hershey for 6 weeks now, and he had been such a blessing. He is a year and a half old, and spent half of his life in the shelter. He started off very unsure of himself, and very nervous around people. We have been showering him with love and hugs and treats and anything else he might need, and he has come out of his shell so much. He is still a shy little boy but he is much more comfortable now. He and I are pretty much inseparable. He and Damien quickly became best buddies. Damien sleeps in Hershey's bed with him, and they even share each others toys. All in all its been a joy having him. I still truly feel as though a little part of my heart will always be missing. Donnie took it with him when he had to leave me. I still have moments when I feel overwhelmed with grief for him. But i am so glad i decided to open my heart again. Hershey is helping me live, instead of just breathing in and out while the days pass. I love him so much. I never thought i would feel that way again. I am truly blessed to have my little family. I hope everyone out there is having a peaceful evening.
Much love, Donnie, Damien and Hershey's Mom
moon_beam
Hi, DonniesMom, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you and your precious Damien and Hershey are doing. I am sooooooo happy for you that your precious Hershey now knows he has a Forever Home, with you as his Forever Mom.

DonniesMom, there will always be a piece of your heart that will feel absent because you miss your beloved Donnie. This is very normal - - for me even after many, many MANY decades have passed since I was a very young child I still miss the little kitty that I first remember who was called William Ferocious - - not because he was vicious but because of his BRAVERY. He was a very sweet natured little fellow whose earthly journey was very brief - - and I still feel the heartache that I felt as a very young child when I found his lifeless little body on Thanksgiving Day.

You are very wise to recognize that your heart is able to expand and embrace a new companion - - and I know your beloved Donnie gently guided your and Hershey's paths to the place where you would meet and know it was "RIGHT" for him to join your family. Your beloved Donnie is very proud of you, and is smiling as he keeps a loving vigil over you from his heavenly home.

I hope today is treating you, your husband, and your precious Damien and Hershey kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Donnie's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
DonniesMom
Dear moonbeam, thank you for your always kind words, and for sharing your story about sweet little William Ferocious. I'm sure he was a great kitty, and what a great name too! I also miss my childhood fur friends, especially my pit bull named Tigger. My family got her before i was born, and when I came along, she thought I was her puppy. She was so kind. She passed away when I was 10. I am 25 now, and I still tear up at the thought of her. Our pets touch our hearts in ways that people can't. They see us at our silliest, and they are there to comfort us at our saddest. We could not ask for better company. Again, thank you for sharing your words with me. You are such a kind and wise soul. I always enjoy hearing from you.
DonniesMom
Here is another picture of my pretty boy
DonniesMom
And this is my sweet little Damien
moon_beam
Hi, DonniesMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and for sharing these wonderful pictures of your precious Hershey and Damien. There is no doubt in seeing your precoius Hershey that he KNOWS he has a Forever Home, and your precious Damien looks so content - - he KNOWS he is "king" of his domain. Thank you again so much for sharing these wonderful pictures of your precious companions with us.

I hope today is treating you, your husband, and your precious Damien and Hershey kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Donnie's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.
Invision Power Board © 2001-2019 Invision Power Services, Inc.