I know I have not been around in a while. Theresa and I are doing OK, but still struggling with the missing piece of our family. This may not be the place, but I have a sort of odd question. Is it weird or disrespectful to Tom's memory that I still take care of his virtual in PetVille on Facebook? Like the medicines, syringes, ets. I can't bring myself to get "rid" of it....

if it makes you feel better in any way, then i say do it. i haven't seen Petville, but if that's where your remembrance is then it seems ok.

Hi Tom's Dad,

I'm very sorry for the loss of your beloved Tom. I'm new to this site and hope I'm not being inappropriate offering an opinion. If you don't mind some 2cent psychology, here is my thought. As long as it's not an obsession, I think continuing with Tom in Petville is a positive, harmless way for you to feel connected with your missing loved one. Just a suggestion though, is it possible to slowly 'heal' the vitual Tom from his ailments? Since the real Tom is now healthy and in a happy place, it might be a more timely representation of his current state if you can bring the virtual to that same healthy level. That way you can help yourself move away from the feelings of ill health and loss. With a healthy virtual, you can relive better times - or if your Tom was always a bit frail, a healthy virtual can help you can imagine a robust, happy Tom, running around and doing his little Tom 'thing', which I'm sure is how he is today. It may help you move beyond the feelings of loss and help to focus on happy memories.

If I've overstepped my place and offened you by offering my opinion, I deeply apologize. I lost my darling Golden Retriever, Peggy 2 weeks ago and know that the last thing any of us needs is someone stepping in with an unwanted opinion on how we should move forward. I truly offer my suggestion from a place of caring and compassion.

I will keep you and your Tom in my prayers.

Take care,

Peggy

P.S. Peggy The Dog came to me at the age of 2 and her name already well establised. I know it seems weird but I didn't name her, but clearly she was meant for me since we shared the same name. I only mention it because I've had many people criticize me for 'giving the dog my name'.

I'm not offended. I don't think it's an obsession, just spend about 5-10 minutes each day with virtual feeding, cleaning and helping neighbors in the game. Um, the virtual isn't sick, so not sure how I would go about healing. I was just wondering if anyone thought it was weird or inappropriate....I just feel it's one more way to feel "connected" to Tom. I miss him terribly.

Hi Tom's Dad,

I'm sorry, I misunderstood. When I read 'Like the medicines, syringes, ets. I can't bring myself to get "rid" of it.... ' I thought you meant in the vitual world. Guess I'm not paying the attention I should when reading. And I don't think you're being inappropriate or weird. I think it's a great way to help you maintain that 'connected' feeling and if it eases your pain, all the better. We each need to do whatever feels right to make it through these difficult days.

Take care,

Peggy

Hi, Tom, it sounds like you have a good outlet to help you with the "virtual" care of your precious Tom. I don't know very much about "video" or "virtual" things - - but if this helps comfort you, Tom, it's okay.

Please know you and your precious Teresa are in my thoughts and prayers, and will look forward to knowing how you're doing whenever possible.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Thanks all for the support. A side note - In another game where I have named the main city for Sir Thomas, I now have a thriving colony that I have named for the Lady Theresa. I know it probably sounds frivolous, but it helps me stay connected to furbabies both absent and present...

Hi Tom,

I agree with what has already been said. Grieving the loss of a precious companion is one of the most difficult things we can go through. Therefore, anything that makes us feel a little better, even if only for a while, is definately a good thing.

Take care of yourself,
Cheryl x

Hi, Tom, it sounds like you have found a very creative way of honoring both your precious Sir Thomas and Lady Theresa. How very clever. I hope that your colony thrives. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

TomsDad,

I think this is marvelous! And being a super nerdy computer geek, I just may do the same!! Thanks for inspiring this for my Finn. I may do an Irish themed one for him, Finn Mc Cool!



ConnieJ