It's been seven weeks since we had to send Hunny to meet Lily. I still miss her so very much. Most of the day is fine, but every once in a while it's just like being hit by a tidal wave. Just a sudden wash of pain and sorrow for both Hunny and Lily. I can't believe it's been 11 months since Lily had to leave. I wish I could see them again. I have them both on a pet memorial site too, but I find it hard to go there since Hunny left. It's such an empty feeling without them, even though we have four other dogs. It's not the same. I wish they could have lived a lot longer. I sure hope these pups live to a ripe old age.

Just having a blue morning I guess.

Hello, I'm very sorry for your two losses and wish you the best to you and your family and most of all to your sweet babys up in Heaven, God Bless you all. Hugs, Jorge Click to view attachment

Thank you so much.

I am so sorry for your loss. It has been just over a month since I lost Pepper and I have good days and bad days, sometimes I find I just feel like crying and other times in the day I feel o.k. Today I was feeling sad as she used to love to be outside in the nice weather. I can't imagine losing two dogs so close together. My dog was only 6 1/2 when she died. I will be getting new puppy on June 13/09. I hope too that the new pup will live to a ripe old age. It is sad to lose them at a young age. My thoughts are with you.

It's been 5 weeks since my boy went to Heaven and I, too, have good days and bad days. yesterday was a bad one and I cried alot. Today is a bit better. I agree, it's twice as bad to lose them when they're young. My boy was only 7 when he left me. I have started searching for a new puppy and I am looking for a breeder who focus's on health and longevity as well as temperament. I miss my boy, but I also miss having a dog in the house. Does anyone else feel torn between wanting another and feeling that it's disrepctful to the one I'm grieving for to get another so soon? This emotional tug-of-war with myself is also causing me a lot of sleepless nights. I'll say a prayer for you and wish everyone on this site peace.

Carol

Carol, I am feeling the same emotional tug-of-war that you describe. At first I couldn't bear the thought of a new cat. Now I'm starting to think a kitten would cheer me up. It will be nice to have a new pet, but at the same time, I feel like I will never love another the way I loved Sydney, so I will never experience quite the same joy that she brought to my life. That makes me very sad.

Thank you very much for your response. You'd be surprised how many people I know who wouldn't give getting another a second thought! I just keep wondering if I rush into it would I ever love the new puppy like I did Austin or worse yet, constantly compare it to Austin. That wouldn't be fair to the puppy.

Hsles - You might compare personalities, but I don't think you would think one was better than the other, or anything like that. We got a new cat when one of the two died (reluctantly, but the other cat drove this decision) but it's a NEW animal, not a replacement for the previous one. Maybe you saved it. In any case, you will give it a good home. It will not replace your previous pet, but if you loved your previous pet (obviously) that loss leaves a gap. Give your love to a new pet, you are not disrespecting the previous animal in any way. In fact, it is a sign of respect, in that the previous animal was a very important part of your life. Give another animal a loving home.

I was torn about getting a new puppy but I too miss having a dog in the house. I miss Pepper like crazy and no other dog can replace her and at times I am torn but I still have so much love to give and there is a puppy that needs a home and somone to love her. No dog can replace Pepper I feel I am meeting a new friend, I also think is it possible that I can love another dog as much as Pepper, but I had dogs before Pepper that died and I thought the same thing when they died and I loved Pepper so much. I find all the dogs had their own personality and I loved them all for their uniqueness. I had a dream last night of Pepper the first I have had since she died and it felt so real that she was here that I missed her alot today. There are going to be good days and bad days for sure for many months to come.

Thanks to everyone who replied. And I'm so sorry for your losses.

A new pet will never replace the one you lost. And you will not love them like you loved your old friend. You will love them, and you will love them just as much, but it'll be different. They all have different personalities and there are other pets out there who need someone to love and take care of them.

We adopted Izzy about ten days after we lost Lily. Maybe it was karma. Because we lost Lily June 24, and Izzy was surrended by a puppy mill breeder on that very same day. Sometimes, I like to think that Lily left so that we could give love to another needy animal. We also rescued Lily when she was 18 months, so she knew the value of a new home. We have since adopted two more since then. Hunny had the chance to know all of them. And then, just three weeks after we lost Hunny, George came into our lives. Karma again? I was walking our pups one day when I mentioned to my daughter that maybe we need a big dog to protect our beagles from the neighbours big dogs. And then just two days later George showed up at my work. We believe that some one dumped him. He's about a year old. My husband believes that Hunny sent him to watch over the pups. Nice thought, but I'm not so sure about that.

Anyway, if you loved your beloved pet so much, I'm sure you all have room in your hearts to love another. It does hurt so very much when we lose them, but I for one, would never have missed the time that I had with each and every one of them. They have a special place in my heart, and they took a huge chunk of it when they went to heaven. I miss them all so very much and some days it just hurts so much. But I feel sorry for people who have never known the love of a pet. They are missing out on so much.

When you're ready - you'll find that next special baby and you'll love them with all of your heart. Like they say it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. And I believe that it is not disrespectful to find another one. When Lily left, Hunny missed her so much. When we got Izzy, then Barney and then Casey, Hunny opened her heart to each of them even though she was sick. I think they helped her live as long as she did. Unfortunately she only had two weeks with Casey.

I am not a religious person, but I do believe in ghosts, so there must be another life after this one. And I had such a hard time when Lily left. Finally, after about six months, it popped into my head, what if she is trapped here and can't move on because I miss her so much? I couldn't bear the thought of her being trapped in between worlds. So, I think it was at that moment, that I "let" her go. I let her spirit move onto the Rainbow Bridge. I needed to believe that she was in a good place, and that she was happy and healthy and having so much fun. I didn't want her to be holding on to me. Her happiness meant so much to me. It was only then that I was able to move forward (as much as I could with Hunny being so sick). And now Hunny is with Lily and they are both together. That brings me so much peace. They belonged together. And one day I hope to see them again. But until then, I need for them to be happy and healthy. At this point, my happiness is not as important as knowing that they are together and that they are happy and whole again. I imagine them plodding and running through lush green fields and meadows. And traipsing through water filled ditches. That is what they loved to do.

Anyway, take care everyone. There are so many unfortunate cats and dogs out there who are so desperate for love. Even though they only get to stay with us for a little while, remember how good it feels to love a precious baby.

My thoughts are with each and every one of you.

I am missing my babies so much today. I can't stop crying. I can't believe that it will be a year June 24 since we lost Lily, and ten weeks this Saturday since we let Hunny join her. I'm at work right now and all I want to do is crawl into a hole and bawl my eyes out.

I miss them so much it hurts.

I know this is probably not what this site is for, but:

Dear Hunny and Lily.

I miss you both so very much right now. I can't believe that it will be a year June 24th Lily. I miss you as much today as I did when you left us so suddenly last year. And Hunny I miss you too. I wish I could hold you both tight and never let you go. I just feel so empty at the moment. Just having another blue moment. It doesn't take much to trigger a strong wave of emotion for you both. They just played your song on the radio Hunny. That always makes me cry.

The pups are doing fine. Sometimes, I wonder if your still with us Hunny, cos every once in a while Izzy will just look around the room, but high up. It's like she's looking at something. I hope it's you that she sees. You too Lily. I know you never had the chance to meet Izzy, but I like to think that you left so that she could have a chance at a good life, just like you had. God, I miss you both so much. I wish you could come home.

Finally looks like we're gonna get some summer. You both loved this time of year, cos we always went for walks and you two could wander around the field or just run off ahead. I miss our walks so much. Don't do that very often now. Just too difficult with four dogs. The beagles just want to sniff the ground and it takes them ages just to walk half a mile. Oh well, maybe that will change as they get older. I like to just sit on the front deck and "watch" you both walking to Nan's.

Oh well, better go now. I just wanted to let you both know how much I am missing you.

I love you both with my heart and soul. I wish I could just hold you again. Hunny, I guess it's time we buried your ashes eh? I just can't seem to let go. Lily, I mean no disrespect by not laying Hunny next to you. I wish we would have had you cremated too and then both of you could stay with me forever.

I love you both.

Love Mum.

Lynette,

I wish I could just hug you and cry together. It's only been 8 days since Sammie left me and the pain is still so very raw. I haven't cried much today (which makes me feel guilty) but I have this horrible chest pain. Breathing in and out hurts. It is a rainy, gloomy old day and I wish I was home with Sammie curled up on the couch being lazy. The more I am reading and studying things I believe your babies and my Sammie can see us. I believe they will make themselvers known by either a dream, a vision, a smell or watching your other pets looking up at them. I think that is a definite sign that both of your babies are still there in spirit. It still sucks b/c I want to hug and kiss her not imagine her spirit. I think I'm getting mad now and I'm not even sure at what. I'm just mad this hurts so bad and I'm mad our babies had to leave us. I went to Barnes and Noble and bought the book "All Pets Go to Heaven" and I'm hoping to find some comfort in that. I'll let you know if it helps me. Try to do anything to keep your mind on something else. Look at me telling you to do this when I can't figure out how to do it myself. Minute by minute, day by day is all we can do. One thing I'm sure of right now.....you loved your dogs and they knew it. They were loved and cherished and loved you so much back. My friend keeps telling me that all the love Sammie gave me is worth far more than the pain I feel now that she is gone. I know that is true but wow is it devastating. I hope the next hour is better than the last for you.

Melanie

Melanie - you are so kind. I wish the pain could go away and that they were back here with us. I know it will fade in time, but yes, I still feel guilty if I don't shed a tear when I think of them. Not that that happens very often. I know they all knew that they were loved. And the thought that they are watching over us is very comforting.

Another blue day. Recently, I've found myself wondering if Hunny would still be alive if we hadn't put her to sleep. I miss her and Lily so much. I can't believe that it will be a year since we lost Lily. I love them both so much.

I know just how you feel Lynette, I wonder too if my Buddy wld still be here if I hadn't had him put to sleep. We ask ourselves some strange questions indeed.
elaine

One year today we lost our precious Lily. I can't believe it! I miss her so much.

It has been such a long year. Probably the worst of my entire life. First Lily left us so suddenly and unexpectedly, then Hunny got sick - she left us this past April. It has been such a long recovery. Losing two precious angels in less than a year I'm surprised I survived it this well. But then I guess I haven't had much choice. Life doesn't stop because I lost my babies.

Still haven't buried Hunny's ashes next to Lily. Just can't seem to bring myself to do that. There is some kind of comfort having Hunny sitting in the living room. I just wish that we would have had Lily cremated. She could be there too.

I hope that they are both happy and healthy once again. I'm so proud of the way Hunny handled her awful disease. Lily would have been proud of her too. I know Hunny missed Lily so much and maybe if Lily had still been here Hunny would have beat the cancer. Maybe, such a big dream.

I hope that they are running through the lush green fields up there, or wherever they are. I hope that aren't missing us too much. We miss them, but we need for them to be happy until we are together again.

Hunny, Lily - we miss you so much. We love you with all of our hearts and will forever. Keep having fun. Till we meet again my babies - I love you. Hugs and kisses from us all.

Love you both.

Love Mum.

Lynette,

I am sending hugs your way today on the 1 year mark of losing Hunny. With all my heart I believe that Hunny and Lily are together romping around having the very best time of their lives and will see you again someday and it will be even more amazing than when they were here on Earth with you. That doesn't stop the pain or the intense sense of loss in our hearts I know but hopefully you can find comfort in that. I've read so many of your posts to other people and you really are helping others by sharing. You have a wonderful heart. May God give you peace and comfort today.
Melanie

Thanks so much Melanie.

To my dear babies, Hunny and Lily.

Today is my birthday and I feel lost and empty without you here to share it with me. Last year was really tough because you had already left Lily, but this year both of you are not here.

I miss you both so much. I sure hope that you are happy together - wherever you are. And I hope that you are close by and watching over all of us. I would love a visit from you sometime.

It's getting easier, but still have waves of emotion. The pups are doing well. Barney and Casey are into everything, specially Casey. Izzy is doing really well. It seems that since George showed up she's really started to come out of her shell. She listens when we call her, she plays with the others more. She is definitely a lot more relaxed now. Still has her moments, but that may never change. I know they all miss you Hunny, except George of course, he never had the honour of knowing either of you. I know they would have all loved you Lily. Hopefully, one day we will all be together again.

Carly's doing well. She's bored at home now though. I keep telling her to call her friends, but she says she can't be bothered. She's reading lots and doing puzzles.

Dad's good too.

Anyway, just needed to write this down. I miss you both so much and I will always love you with every beat of my heart.

Love always.

Mum.

Happy Birthday, Lynette. I'm sure your babies are smiling down at you today and sending you lots of love on your special day.

lynette, I, too, have had hard time today, even though it has just been a month since I had to bury the love of my life, a 3&1/2 pound chihuahua named Bitsy! Yes, it hits me just as hard! Yes, it has ben so empty! But, following advice from my favorite Veterinarian Author, James Herriot, I took in another pet shortly after Bitsy passed. Fancy, a Jack Russell Terrier, is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like my lost little chi! But, that is exactly what I and my family needed! If I had goten another chi, I would have constantly been trying to compare it with Bitsy, a comparison which would have been on SO many levels to have been unfair!

Grieve while you must, but, please consider taking in another little friend! You can NEVER replace either Hunny or Lily, but what you CAN do is share the love you had for them with another pet who is just as deserving!

Andy

beautiful words Dusty Moonrise & oh so very true.
Go Gently Lynette
elaine

Thanks for all your kind words and birthday wishes.

It always brings tears to my eyes to read these posts.

We have four pups now. We adopted Izzy, a 4 year beagle ( a puppy mill rescue) just ten days after losing Lily. Izzy was surrended on the same day Lily flew to heaven. Sometimes, I like to believe that Lily gave up her place with us so that another baby could have the same love and affection that she was blessed with after she too was rescued from a humane society back in 2001.

Then we got Barney in November, he was just 8 weeks old, another beagle. Then just two weeks before we gave Hunny her angel wings we adopted Casey, a 6 month old beagle/cavalier cross. Hunny knew all three of them and loved each one. We had hoped that Hunny would have slipped away in her sleep, but I think she fought as long and hard as she did because of the pups. It still breaks my heart to think that we had to let her go.

And then just three weeks after Hunny left, George showed up at my workplace. I took him home because it was a Friday and I couldn't possibly leave him here all weekend. We looked for his family for about a month - no one phoned!! So now, we have George, a full blood border collie. We think he's about 1 1/2.

So, we have a full house again. My husband believes that Hunny sent George to watch over the beagles. Kinda sweet, but I'm not so sure about that.

Anyway, so we now we have two boys and two girls, three of whom nobody wanted. And they will never take the place of Hunny or Lily, but they each have their own special place in my heart.

I just hope that they live long healthy lives.

Take care everyone. And thanks again.

Lynette.

wow lynette that's gr8 news about your new fur family.
I like to think like you that hunny left so you cld hve izzy & george well I kinda like your husbands idea bout him too.
We still miss our fur companions and always will, I'm so glad you were able to love again.
elaine

Hi Hunny and Lily.

I am missing you both so very much today.

I have such a heavy heart today. Don't know why, just one of those days I guess.

I wish you could both come home - I could really use a hug.

Anyway, just wanted to say I love and miss you both so very, very much.

I love you babies.

Love Mum.

Lynette:

I'm so sorry for how you're feeling today. I'm feeling the same way; my heart is heavy to the point that I feel like someone is sitting on my chest.

It's been one week since Magnus passed, and I'm missing him terribly. What I wouldn't give to go home, pick him up and just snuggle on the chair watching nothing in particular on TV.

Lynette, sorry you were having such a rough day yesterday. Hopefully today will be better. I don't know about you but the weekends seem to be the hardest for me. Not that I don't miss Keesha a ton during the week but for some reason the weekends are really difficult. Isn't it strange how some days just hit you harder than others? You can have a few "ok" days and then all of a sudden it just hits you like a ton of bricks. Like you with Hunny and Lily I would do just about anything to be able to hug and kiss Keesha one more time...anyway take care.

dear lynette
i hope youre doing better today. im so sorry you were having a rough day. something that we all go thru. once they leave us, our lives are never the same again are they? just know that lucy and i send you a big big bear hug from california. and i bet if you give your littles ones at home an extra squeeze, lily and hunny will feel it "upstairs".
you are not alone.
patricia

Thanks Patricia.

I'll give them an extra big hug tonight and send a kiss "upstairs".

Thanks you so much.

dear dear lynette

i only say it because its the truth. it is so easy for us to stay behind and lay guilt on ourselves. lets honor their life by remembering how wonderful they were during our lifetime. they are born into this earth without one mean, angry bone in their body and they leave us the same way. if they were capable of having these emotions as we are, then they would be human... but lily and hunny would not want this for you. they would want you to release the heavy heavy burden you carry. they would want you know how much they will always love you and how much you mean to them. you gave them a beautiful life lynette. thats the part we all need to hold on to. how sad that we so quickly forget the happy moments with our loved ones and only choose to hold on to those horrible last moments. by doing so we do not honor them. i know how easy that is as i do it too. one moment at a time lynette. start chipping away at this horrible guilt that you carry. you dont deserve it and i know we can be our own worst enemy. you are such a wonderful person and i want you to know that. the comforting words that you have shared with everyone here have helped me tremendously in my own recovery. let your words be a comfort to you. if you say them believe in them for yourself too. lily and hunny would want you to be happy again as happy as when they were by your side. you are the only person that can release that guilt. its ok to miss them and grieve for them. i still grieve for my very first pet that i had when i was 6 but dont let the anger and guilt torment you. you are an amazing and loving individual. i can tell.
you are not alone i am and we are here to hold your hand. i want you to be happy again. and so does lily and hunny....
big big hug!
patricia

Thanks Patricia.


Today I said goodbye to my old friend
I pray some day we get to meet again
under one more clear blue sky
up there where the eagles fly

And we'll go walking in the sunshine
with a big smile on our face
race the river to the ocean
go splashing in the waves
and I'll wrap my arms around you
we'll be together once again
and I'll tell you how much I've missed you
my old friend

Yeah, I know you're up there looking down
on that rainbow bridge we talked about
there's a place for me and you
sonewhere up there behind the moon

And we'll go walking in the sunshine
with a big smile on our face
race the river to the ocean
go splashing in the waves
and I'll wrap my arms around you
we'll be together once again
and I'll tell you how much I've missed you
my old friend.

This is a Johnny Reid song - I just love it. Apparently this is what he wrote about this song -

"This song was written the day I had to say goodbye to "My Old Friend" Wallace. I was given 7 minutes to relive 14 years, this proved to be impossible, as I watched and felt him go to sleep for the last time, I held him in my arms. I continued to hold him and tell him how much he meant to me. I drove home alone and with a broken heart went straight to my music room and wrote this song.

His love and friendship will live forever in my heart. His song is not a song of sadness but a song of celebration for the life and all the time we spent together."


Hunny and Lily -and all my other babies up there at the Rainbow Bridge - this song is for you too! I love you all with all my heart and soul. And I hope we'll get to walk together again in the sunshine.

Love you babies.

Love Mum

so tough to read but so beautiful. i cant wait for that day! i imagine a sea of our furry friends and as we call out their names they run and jump in our arms to never part again. i cant imagine a happier day.
thank you lynette!!!
patricia

Dear Hunny and Lily.

I hope you guys are having lots of fun up there.

I miss you both so much.

Today is Barney's birthday. He turns one today. It's gonna be sad not to have you both here with us today. I know you'll be here in spirit though. I know there will be lots of birthdays when I get there.

We baked him a cake - a doggy recipe of course. He'll be excited. I know you'd be so proud of him Hunny.

Casey's is just a couple weeks away too.

I gave Izzy a great big hug and kiss yesterday and asked her to pass it on to you when she sees you again. She often looks up at the ceiling like she's looking at someone. I like to believe she's looking at you Hunny and you too Lily. I know you never met Izzy, Lil. I think you two would have gotten along so well.

Anyway, just wanted to say I love you and I miss you. And that I'll be thinking of you later when we give Barney his birthday cake.

Love you both.

Love forever, Mum

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

lynette, thanks for the pleasant read, happy bithday Barney and Casey, stay well all , Scott

Happy (belated) Birthday Barney! I hope you enjoyed your cake and helped ease your Moms pain.

It's been 14 months since Lily left and almost 5 months for Hunny. I stopped exercising about a week before we sent Hunny to Lily. I haven't been able to get back into it. I just don't have the desire to. I just don't seem to really care about much these days. I love my babies of course, more than anything, but I dunno life just isn't the same. I used to go for long walks with Hunny and Lily. I haven't done that since Lily left.

How do I get back to "normal"? How do I get back the desire to take care of myself? How do I get back the desire to care about other stuff? I'm assuming this is all part of the grieving process or maybe I just don't want to anymore. Life certainly has changed since losing Hunny and Lily. So many things just dont' seem as important as before. I hate coming to work.

It's been such a cold wet summer this year, maybe it's just that. Maybe because I haven't been able to spend much time outdoors that I still feel - depressed. Maybe I just need help.

I don't know what to do. I had thought about not coming here anymore. I love reading others stories and trying to help them through their loss and pain, but sometimes it just drags up my pain too much. And sometimes I think it's just slowing down my own healing. But I just can't seem to stay away from here. I guess maybe I still need this. I'm just so sad as I write this.

I'm just thinking out loud I guess.

Hunny and Lily - I miss and love you so much.

Dear Lynnette,
I'm glad you came on here,it's good to vent where no one will think you are strange.
I know this virtual support isn't the same as being able to talk to you directly, though it is a link that I know will help get you thru your grief.
Each of us have our own unique journeys thru grief though one of the many "universal" links is the pain we feel after our losses.
The struggle to feel "normal" whatever that is!!!!! (if anyone knows what that "normal" is PLEASE let me know!!!!!!!!!) often times is almost unbearable isn't it?
Go back to one minute, one hour, one whatever it is that gets you thru the day...slow & steady is the way to go....remember to 'breathe' out deeply, then 'breathe' in slow & long then out again..........
{{HUGS}}} to help you thru your day.
elaine xx

[quote name='lynette' date='Aug 25 2009, 09:27 AM' post='52444']
It's been 14 months since Lily left and almost 5 months for Hunny. I stopped exercising about a week before we sent Hunny to Lily. I haven't been able to get back into it. I just don't have the desire to. I just don't seem to really care about much these days. I love my babies of course, more than anything, but I dunno life just isn't the same. I used to go for long walks with Hunny and Lily. I haven't done that since Lily left.

How do I get back to "normal"? How do I get back the desire to take care of myself? How do I get back the desire to care about other stuff? I'm assuming this is all part of the grieving process or maybe I just don't want to anymore. Life certainly has changed since losing Hunny and Lily. So many things just dont' seem as important as before. I hate coming to work.

It's been such a cold wet summer this year, maybe it's just that. Maybe because I haven't been able to spend much time outdoors that I still feel - depressed. Maybe I just need help.

I don't know what to do. I had thought about not coming here anymore. I love reading others stories and trying to help them through their loss and pain, but sometimes it just drags up my pain too much. And sometimes I think it's just slowing down my own healing. But I just can't seem to stay away from here. I guess maybe I still need this. I'm just so sad as I write this.


WOW! i can relate to everything you said here. its something i never thought i would share but i feel better knowing that im not alone. dont get me wrong. i love my lucy with all my heart and she has made my life bearable but life has changed. i just like spending time with her. i dont care about getting together with friends or taking care of myself and i hate work because im away from her. sometimes i wonder if its because im so scared of losing her too. and just like you ive considered not coming to this site anymore because it does conjure up those feelings of deep sadness that im trying to push down so much. i promised fred that i would keep doing it and i would hate for him to be disappointed… but at the same time i cant stay away because i feel so not alone here. ive wondered the same thing: is it grieving or is my life going to be like this from now on?
ive also thought we are torn in two. i know for me, i have great days when i dont think about fred and riley being gone but then i feel so bad because im afraid if i dont think about them i will forget them. its silly i know but its true. and then all of a sudden i have these great days when i think of my fred and riley and know they are happy and running and not sick anymore and then i fall. its got to be part of grieving and i keep trying to swim up to the surface. you have to too lynette. weve got to believe that better days are ahead. can i give you some advice? take it with a grain of salt. but maybe you should take time off of this site. take time for yourself and to love barney and izzy. maybe take a 10 minute walk sometime just by yourself, not with your new furkids just you. so you can be alone with your feelings. and noone to distract you. and then maybe have barney join you on the next walk and mark it as a new beginning and a new commitment with your baby. maybe go a different route, one thats only for you and your. that way your route(s) with hunny and lily are memorialized.
hang in there lynette. your not alone. we are all in this hell together. you are in my thoughts!
patricia

Thanks Patricia.

I needed to hear that someone else had these feelings too.

Thanks for the advice.

I completely get what you say about being afraid of losing your new baby too. I am so paranoid sometimes about Barney and Casey. They are only a year old and they get into absolutely everything. I'm terrified that they'll eat something or choke on something. I hope they outgrow this stage soon!!! I love them to death, Izzy and George too, but you're right it's not the same as it was with Hunny and Lily. Not yet anyway.

Maybe I should take time away from here, but for some reason I just can't seem to stay away. It's like a magnet - it just draws me here everyday.

I think I'll take your advice about going for a walk though. Try anyway, the mosquitoes are so bad here these days!! Maybe I'll take Barney too. Barney and Casey pull so hard it's hard taking them for walks. I guess that's why I don't do it often. Maybe one at a time will work though.

Thanks for listening. I really appreciate it. It helps knowing that someone else feels the same as I do. Life certainly has changed. And who knows what normal is, but maybe it just takes time to create a new "normal".

Thanks again.

Lynette.

Hi Babies.

They're playing your song on the radio Hunny.

God, I miss you both so much. I hope so much that you're both happy wherever you are.

I love you guys.

Love Mum.

Hi my babies.

I'm feeling sad again today. Uncle Tom died yesterday. I don't know if you two ever met him - Murray's dad. Bud and Lady would probably remember him. You both knew Murray pretty well. Well he died yesterday from liver cancer. When someone close dies it always drags up the memories and pain of you both leaving me.

Maybe you'll see him up there. He'd be with Princess, a little poodle. And probably with his son who died way back when. I hope he'll be happy and healthy again. We haven't heard yet whent he funeral will be, but you can guarantee that I'll be thinking of you the whole time.

I cried all the way to work again. It never seems to get any easier.

I miss you two so much. I love you both.

People reading this might think I'm crazy writing to you like this as often as I do, but whatever. Sometimes, I just need to talk to you. A lot of times I need to talk to you both.

Anyway, will write again.

Love you both with all of my heart and soul.

Love Mum.

Hi babies.

It's Casey's birthday today - don't know what to get her. She's such a sweetie. They all are.

You wouldn't believe how far Izzy has come. It's amazing. Sure, she still has her moments, but what a difference from this time last year!! You'd be so proud of her Hunny.

George starts agility classes this Saturday. I think he'll love that. He's bored. He loves to chase the cows and goats away from the fence, but I think he'd love to get in there with them and work them.

Just wanted to say how much I miss you both and that I love you.

Carly goes back to school tomorrow. I don't think she wants to go. Summer went by so fast even though we had such awful weather this year - again. The pups will miss her too. They've loved her being home with them. They don't have to be locked up in the house all day. Oh well, what can we do?


Anyway I'll talk to you again.

Love Mum.

big (((((((hug))))))) from lucy and myself

patricia

Thanks.

Hey girls.

Hope you're both enjoying yourselves up there. I miss you so very much. It seems like such a long time ago since you left.

And now you're gone aren't you Hunny? I know you still come back to check on us, but you're gone aren't you? You've moved on. Izzy no longer looks up at the ceiling anymore. When she did this I was sure she was looking at you. I think you were here keeping an eye on the pups. I guess George is doing a good job cos I haven't seen Izzy do that for a while now. I miss you so much though. You too Lily.

The pups are doing good. George went for his first day of agility training Saturday morning. Dad took him - he thinks he enjoyed himself. George was kind of scared to get in the truck though - guess he wasn't sure what was going on or if he'd be coming back. I guess George must still have some insecurities about being dumbed. Of course we would never let George go. He's here forever. Carly took Barney for a walk by himself last night and left George in the fence. He was so mad! Poor thing - he couldn't go for a walk with Barney. Isn't that cute?

He's doing a good job Hunny. I know you'll be proud of him. You too Lily. I wish you could have met them all.

George has really helped Izzy come out of her shell. She has come such a long way Hunny. Maybe that's why you left now - you can see just how well she's coming along now. She's gonna be ok. I know she'll probably always have some issues with her past, but I never thought we'd even get this far.

Anyway, I love you babies and I miss you both so much. Please come and visit me sometimes. My only wish for you both is that you're happy and healthy. I don't expect you to hang around watching over us, but a little visit once in a while would be nice. I know we'll meet again someday - and I'll read you both the letter that I sent with you Hunny.

Love you both.

With love Mum, Izzy, George, Barney and Casey.

Hi, my darlings.

Just want to let you know how much I miss and love you both. I had a weird dream the other night about you Hunny - it was disturbing, but I can't remember it now.

I wish you both would come back for a visit. Or maybe, you do, and I just don't remember them. I miss you both so much.

Everyone is well. Barney and Casey are trouble as usual. Izzy doing well - getting younger with each day!!! And George, I think he loves his agility class. Carly and I went with Dad on Saturday. He was distracted by us, but he was also showing off.

Anyway, I love you both.

Missing you.

Love Mum.

Hi Babies.

I woke up with you both on my mind this morning. I have such a heavy heart today. I miss you both so very much. I feel very blue today. I wish I could hold you both.

I hope you're up there having so much fun - you both certainly deserve it. But I just miss you so much.

I love you babies.

Sending hugs and kisses your way.

Love you.

Mum.

Dear Hunny and Lily.

Hi my babies.

It seems that eight is our unlucky number. We found skinny Mamma's body yesterday at Nan's. I don't know when she left to be with you two, but I'm just so sad about this. I believe that Dumper and Lucy killed her. She must have died a horrible death. Can you tell Mamma that I'm so, so sorry? She didn't deserve that. I hate Dumper so much - I just don't trust him. He looks so evil! That's why you sent George eh Hunny? To help protect the beagles. I don't know how much George could do against him. Lucy and Dumper were at the house last night. Dumper looked like he was in stalker - prey drive. I sent him home, but I just do not trust him. He probably has a taste for killing cats now. I let George sleep in the house last night.

Fat Mamma is probably there with you too. She took off a few months ago, and has not come back yet. It's unusual for her to be gone this long. I honestly believe that skinny Mamma missed you both so much. I know she hasn't been happy since you left. You two were all she knew. I feel so bad - heartbroken that she's gone. She was such a good cat.

Did you two meet her when she got there? I hope so. I hope she's happy and whole again. We buried her next to Lily. I guess we should bury you there too eh Hunny? I don't know if I can though - not yet anyway.

I miss you all so much. It's gonna be different without Mamma now. I haven't seen Smokey for a day or so either. I hope he's ok.

Say hi to Mamma for me. To fat Mamma if she's up there too.

I love you all and I miss you all so very much.

Will write again soon.

Love Mum.

Hugs and kisses to you all.

Be happy my babies.