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> Surviving All The "firsts" And The Passing Of Time
Kellyt
post Nov 8 2012, 02:13 PM
Post #1





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 71
Joined: 29-October 12
From: NY
Member No.: 7,808



Today marks ten days since my precious dog, Wolfie, passed away. I know it's going to take time to heal, but all the firsts are making it difficult. The first time back at the vet's office without him, today's first snowfall (being part husky, Wolfie LOVED running and playing in the snow), the upcoming first holidays. I guess the entire year will consist of firsts. It hurts. My heart hurts. I miss him so very much.
Now that a little over one week has gone by, the shock has begun to wear off. I don't react in quite the same way now when the mailman comes or when there's a knock on the door. Today, I finally stopped opening the back door first thing in the morning to imagine letting Wolfie outside. The absence of his physical presence is really beginning to sink in, and it's a whole new layer of heartbreak. His physical presence is already fading. Life is continuing on despite his absence. It doesn't feel right. It feels like a betrayal, like we are ok with him being gone. We are NOT. Even starting this new topic feels weird. Like it's a new step.
I try to focus on his spirit presence, and I do feel it. I wish he would visit me in my dreams. i really just wish I could hold him, hug him, and look into his eyes while telling him he is in my soul forever one more time.
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