Filled With Despair

Hello Everybody,

I'm a 27 year old girl from Sydney, Australia and I'm crying as i'm writing this.

I had to have my beautiful 17 year old Maltese cross Pomeranian dog Daisy put down just over a week a go.

The vet advised she had inflammation of the brain and vestibular syndrome. She had also lost control of her bladder, and on the day we called the vet to our house to put her down, she couldn't walk and was crying and whimpering as if she was in pain. She went downhill very quickly over the space of a few weeks, so it all came as a bit of a shock.

I held her in my arms while the vet gave her the injections. It was not a very nice experience, as my poor little girl was terrified when the needle went in to the back of her neck to sedate her. She yelped extremely loudly, and tried to bite me. Although instantly she stopped trying to bite, and started licking me.

Daisy was my best friend, my love, a huuuuge part of my life. I haven't worked much in the past year, and have spent more time with Daisy than anyone else. We were "joined at the hip" as my Mum often commented. My heart is broken, and I just can't stop crying. The pain is getting worse with each day that passes, and the thought that I won't see her again is just unbearable.

I'm so upset I can't concentrate on anything, and to make matters worse I have many assignments due at University.

I find a lot of people don't understand what i'm going through, and think I should be over it already because she was "just a dog".

I try and focus on the fact that she had a long, wonderful life that was filled with love, and also that she's not in pain anymore. However, this doesn't take the pain of her absence away. I miss her terribly, and I'm just not coping. My house feels so lonely and cold without her. I just don't know how I'm going to get through life without her.

Lauren