Well, I took that trip to Yakima, in the back of my mind I was also heading to the neighbor of my friend that had the blk lab puppies... they were gone...ahhhh!
As most of my friends here know I have been a lost soul since Moose passed (6mo ) On my 2nd trip to Yakima to my friends house Ellie..I thought she understood how bad things had gotten for me, I hadn't even been there 15 minutes after my 300 mile drive and she told me my cat's hair would be an issue!! You can't imagine how I felt!! So........didn't even unpack the car, left back for the Bellingham area feeling like an idiot to tell the truth.
But something happened on that drive over the Cascades, it took me to the next level of my acceptance, I was talking aloud.."okay lord I need your help I am losing everything" I was back up here and within 24 hours a job broke open for me...a good job. I can now make my decisions and my mind is clearer on what I need to do for myself. I am ashamed of myself for letting myself get so lost in my grief to the point of living a somewhat gypsy life..staying at friends homes..but it seemed once I went down I couldn't get up so I had to lay there in my despair, and let it run it's course, my whole life has changed since Moose, I am now living the new life without him that I didn't want, living in a place I tried to run from run from the memories, and I have learned so much this last 6 months about myself, I still don't want this new life without My Moose but I will embrace it now and work harder toward the one day I look forward to...my reunion with all I have lost...this I have Moose to thank for because if it wasn't for him,,I would have never known. He was my beautiful gift, I am so so thankful to have known his spirit.....I had a profound thought...my comfort.my thoughts......Yea though I walk through the valley in the shadow of Moose's death I will fear none of the evil that surrounds me for my lord is guiding me he is setting my feet on the right path as I come out of this deep valley, this deep long valley... Love Pamela

Pamela, I'm so very glad for you.... CONGRATULATIONS on your new job!!! WOOOHOOO!!!

Moose is working his magic to make sure you're happy and well taken care of. He's such a wonderfully special guardian angel.

I'm sorry that your friend greeted you with such negativity about the cat hair. This is really not something you or anyone needs when they've reached out. But, on the brighter side, you picked yourself up and you're on your way.....

Hugs to you!

Pat

Congratulations on the job! I'm so happy to read how well you've been doing. I think you're right...sometimes the pieces have to fall apart in order to be put back together again...this time with duct tape and super glue!
I think you said it best when you said that you are living a life you didn't want...one without Moose...that's the way we all feel I think. But the way I see it, we have 2 options: accept it and live the best life we can, or be stuck in the darkness of grief and not give any honor to our babies' lives. I'm trying my best to live the first option...I know it's a journey and not a destination...full of bumps and turns and scrapes. But people like you give me hope.

Welcome back and congratulations on the new job! I'm sorry things didn't work out in Yakima, but it sounds like things worked out just like they were supposed to.

It brought tears to my eyes when I read that you went back to check on those puppies. It sounds like you've done a whole lot of healing. Moose would be proud!

Love,
Kathleen

Dear Pamela, What a shame that you had to be treated like that when you got to your friend's house. I'm sure your heart was bruised being treated that way. I am so happy for your new job and maybe you will love it and can get settled now. See when the time was right and you were able to go on without your precious Moose God made a way. His timing is just right and I am so glad that He provided for you. I wish many blessings upon your life. Did your son and family move down where you are?
Love, Ann