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> My Tribute To Little Man
zoeysdad
post Sep 3 2004, 12:33 AM
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In Loving Memory of Little Man
September 22, 1992 August 18, 2004


When I first saw you, you were in the arms of a friend of mine who was begging me to "dog sit" you for a few weeks because he and his family were relocating. I reluctantly agreed only after making sure you were already housebroken. He told me his little girl had named you Zoey, a girl's name for a male dog. After about a month, my friend called and said they were unable to find a home that allowed pets, so they were forced to lease a home that didn't allow pets. He then asked me if I would try to find you a good home somewhere. I agreed and even went so far as to place an ad in the paper. But who was I trying to kid? You had stolen my heart after the first few days. I cancelled the ad and this is where our twelve year journey together began.

The local vet's office already had you on file under the name of "Zoey", so I never bothered to change it. From day one, I started calling you Little Man and I think you liked that name much better. We were an odd looking pair I'm sure. I was country to the bone----pickup truck, blue jeans, work boots, living on a few acres way out in the country. You were a Lhasa Apso---a fancy looking little dog---looking more like uptown Fifth Avenue--New York City. You were a pedigree with AKC papers to prove it. But you never tried to act like royalty--you adapted to country living just fine. The only problem was that naturally long white fluffy hair of yours, with its natural part down the middle. That just didn't gel real well with country living, which resulted in my giving you some really bad "home" haircuts. It didn't matter how bad the haircut was, as long as I told you you looked pretty, that was good enough for you. I did splurge a few times a year and take you to the groomer to have a professional hair cut. But they always put a bandana on you and oh how you hated that.

In the beginning, I got a lot of kidding from the guys because you just didn't look like a "guy" kind of dog. If I had gone in search of a dog, I probably wouldn't have given you a second look. Proof that one should never judge anything on looks alone. I think in the beginning, the reason I was so drawn to you was your intelligence. I had never known such a smart dog. It became kind of strange--it's like we always knew what each other was thinking or feeling. In no time at all, I grew to love you like you were my child and you were completly devoted to me. My friends soon learned the fastest way to get on the fighting side of me was to say something negative about my dog.

No matter what I was doing, you wanted to be right beside me. As long as you were with me, that's all that seemed to matter to you. After I took you on your first tractor ride I knew I had really started something. I finally had to build a little box, with a pillow in it of course, for you to sit in while "we" mowed, brush-hogged, or baled hay. Oh, how you loved that! You'd be hot with your tongue hanging out, but you were loving every minute of it and I think it was mainly because you were with me. That, of course, made me feel very special. I've had more than one love interest accuse me of thinking more of you than I did them. In all honesty, it was true. But hey, you were much easier to love than they were and you weren't nearly as demanding. It didn't take much to make you happy; they it seemed, were never satisfied. Others came and went----you stayed--you were my rock, the one I could always count on, no matter what.

You could be ornery at times though. Like the time we had company coming and I gave you a bath, used a blowdryer to dry you hair, then painstakingly brushed your hair. Then when nature called and I let you outside, you went directly to the pasture and rolled in a freshly made cow patty. I could have killed you! But instead, I found the humor in it and got my camera and took a picture of you looking that way. It turned out to be one of my favorite pictures. One of many pictures I took of you over the years but no longer have in my possesion. I only have two photos of you now and they were given to me by friends who had taken them. I will remedy that situation someday, but that's another story.

I remember how I had to be very careful about petting other dogs. If I came home with the scent of another dog on me, you'd get an attitude and go behind the couch and pout. Only after I showered, changed clothes and then apologized would you have anything to do with me. I remember thinking on the way home, "Little Man's gonna be mad". I felt like a cheating husband who had come home smelling of another woman's perfume. It really brings a smile to my face when I remember how crazy it all was.

You were so much a part of my life and daily routine. I miss everything about you and I was completely unprepared to give you up. When you became sick, it was so sudden. When we went to bed that night, you were fine. When I woke up the next morning, I picked you up and placed you on the floor like always. But after I had gotten to the kitchen, I noticed you hadn't followed me. Then I saw you tryng to come down the hallway, but you kept falling down. I ran over and picked you up then I tried to help you stand, but I could tell your entire left side was almost completely paralyzied.

I rushed you to the vet and they ran lots of tests and finally told me I should consider having you euthanized. They couldn't do anything to help you. I was in shock and devastated. I picked you up and took you back home--determined I was going to find a way to help you. I made your favorite foods that night and you seemed to have a really good appetite. I'd take you outside, but you couldn't stand up unless I helped hold you up. Then on the second day, I could tell you were in pain because you'd whimper when I touched you. I just couldn't stand the thought of you being in pain and in a moment of clarity, I decided the only thing I could do to help you was to end your pain.

For twelve years, I had been taking you to the same vet. You hated to go there and you'd start trembling as soon as we walked in the door. This last time, for the first time ever, you didn't tremble even slightly. You just sat on my lap with your head held high and didn't seem to be afraid at all. I remember how strange I thought that was. Then I realized this was your way of telling me it was ok--it was the right thing to do. You were always a great communicator and always great at comforting me. Even on this terrible day, you weren't thinking of yourself; as always, you were thinking of me.

I brought you home and buried you in the flower garden behind the house because you always loved to play there. After I dug your grave and placed you in the ground, I felt like I had died too. Everything seemed different---nothing was the same. Nothing made sense. I was in a fog and just couldn't seem to find a way to deal with this. Everything had happened so fast. My whole world had crumbled.

When I walked into the house, I realized just how important your presence had been. Everything seemed connected to you in some way. Your water bowl, collar, leash, toys, milkbone and other treats you had hidden all over the house---your presence was everywhere, but you were now out in the garden and the reality of it all just wouldn't sink in. I still haven't washed the shirt I was wearing when I took you to the vet for the last time. Sometimes I pick it up and smell it---just trying to get as close to you as I can I guess.

I write this tribute to you because I want there to be a record of your life. I want it to be known that the twelve years you spent here on this earth were years well spent. You loved and you were loved. You mattered and you cared. And you are missed greatly. You made a difference in my life and as much as it hurt to let you go, I don't regret one single moment of having you. It was a tremendous honor to be your Dad and I'll always cherish the love you gave so freely. You will never be forgotten.

It's been a little over two weeks since I buried you. I now face the fact that I'm never going to have your 'physical' presense here on earth anymore. Many people had told me you would continue to live in my heart and mind, but in the beginning, I didn't really comprehend the meaning of that. I think I have now come to understand. It's true, I haven't really lost you---I still have you, just in a different way.

I can't see you with my eyes anymore, but I can see you in my mind.
I can't touch you with my hands, but I can feel you in my heart.
I can't hold you in my arms, but I can hold you in my dreams.
And above all, I can and will remember you with all my love.

Rest in peace Little Man.

My love always, Dad


--------------------
"Daddies Little Man"
September 22, 1992 -- August 18, 2004

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MAXIESMOMMY
post Sep 3 2004, 07:36 AM
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Oh, Jim
What a beautiful beautiful tribute to Little Man. I'm at work with tears in my eyes. He was just meant to be yours. He is so special to you. I am glad you are able to start remembering all your special times together for the last 12 years and not focus so much on the times right now. You were a great dad to him and he knew it. He also loved you very much in return. His physical being is in the garden, but his spirit and love are with you in everything you do. He still looks forward to his rides on the tractor and even if you don't see him there, you can bet he's still there with you.
Each day we think of them with a tiny bit more smiles and perhaps just a couple less tears.

Take care,
Carol
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Stymy's Mom
post Sep 3 2004, 10:08 AM
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Dear Zoey's Dad,

That tribute was beautiful. The two of you were lucky to have each other. Zoey must be very proud of this.

Love and Belief,
Stymy's Mom
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gingerspal
post Sep 4 2004, 01:38 PM
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Dear Jim,

Before I came here to lightning strikes I would have avoided reading something like you wrote at all costs. As soon as I determined that the story was going to be "sad" I would stop reading. I am glad I have finally faced this phobia of mine..because if I hadn't read this all the way through I would have definately "missed out". I went through alot of kleenex--but I am still very glad I read this. I guess for most of my life I have lived with alot of "illusion"..I would not accept certain things..especially when it comes to animals. The buddhists advise that if we all accept that every living thing has an end we will all be alright. But the "separation" of death just seems so cruel. (In the beginning).
I especially love what you wrote about the differences between your little man and the people in your life. Some feel that that is why we were given dogs and cats...to teach us how we should treat others. Your story expresses that perfectly. What a world it would be if people loved one another like Zoey loved you! Reading this makes me feel like you and your little man are all of us and we are you--that all living things are one another..each one of us emerging and creating new life and falling apart and coming together, all that a great energy like an ever moving stream. We are all one connected by the same air and sunshine, the same life spirit of love and acceptance. Life is Hello and Life is Goodbye. and Life is Hello again.
{{{{{{{{{{JIM}}}}}}}}}}}}}


--------------------
Ginger was part Norwegian Forest Cat. When I first took him in he was a meanie, so his full name was "Gingersnap", and I did not change his name after I learned she was a he.
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BabyHannahsMom
post Sep 4 2004, 08:53 PM
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Zoey's Dad,
Oh, what a beautiful tribute to your precious little man. I cried and cried when I read it, especially the part about burying him and feeling your whole world crumble. When the vet gave my baby Hannah the shot, I wished I could have had one too and just gone with her. Nothing WILL ever be the same anymore, but what love, what a wonderful love to have shared! Little Man was a lucky little man to have you for a Dad, and I know he did know how much he was loved. He would be so proud of your tribute to him. I know he had a wonderful life with you.


Your poem is beautiful too. You said what we all feel. Thank you and bless you.
Marcia
Baby Hannah's Mom and Babe's Mom
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zoeysdad
post Sep 21 2004, 10:13 PM
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In Loving Memory of Little Man
September 22, 1992----August 18, 2004

Today is your 12th birthday but is also the five week anniversary of your passing from this earth. I'm happy because I remember all your previous birthdays and all the great times we had together. But I'm also sad because I miss you so terribly. You were only about four months old when you came into my life a bit unexpectedly and there you stayed for almost twelve years. If you were still here on earth on this special day, I would do lots of special things for you; but since you are not, I must do something a little different this year.

First of all, I wanted to do something to honor your memory. I ordered you a monument last week, (though it'll be about two weeks before it's ready)--and I think you'll like it. It will serve as a reminder to all who see it that you once graced this world with your presence and that you were much loved in life and greatly missed in death. And secondly, I made a donation in honor of your memory to this website because I believe you had a (paw) in helping me find this site because you knew I was going to need a lot of help from some very special people to help me cope with the pain of losing you.

I also wanted to take this time to thank God for lending you to me for almost twelve years. He knew I needed your love, but I also believe he used you as a tool to show me what love really is and how to determine what's really important in life and what's not. (A big thank you to Patti, (gingerspal) for helping me to realize this)

I suppose the kind of love you and I had for each other is a tough act to follow for any other prospects---human or animal. Your journey here on earth has ended--mine hasn't. So with a heavy heart and a weary mind, I must continue my journey without my best friend walking by my side. I carry you in my heart now, but my journey is much more lonesome than it used to be. But then I try to imagine what my life would have been like if I had never known you and that's when I remember what a precious gift from God you were and how having you enriched my life more than I could have ever hoped for. If it was indeed your purpose here on earth to show me what love is, then I must congratulate you, Little Man, on a job well done.

Happy 12th birthday, Little Man. I MISS YOU! I send you all my love and a heartfelt thank you for always being there for me during the most difficult times of my life. But most of all, thank you for being my best friend. I'll always cherish your memory and the love you gave so freely.


--------------------
"Daddies Little Man"
September 22, 1992 -- August 18, 2004

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Muffins
post Sep 21 2004, 10:23 PM
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wub.gif HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SWEET LITTLE MAN.................. wub.gif

I know that up in the sky, at Rainbow's Bridge, all of our "furkids" are planning a big SURPRISE PARTY
IN YOUR HONOUR, for your birthday on the 22nd!!!!!!

But, please Little Man, "please, don't 'let on" that I told you................." Okay?? It's just between us!! wub.gif

Please, give a hug & kiss to our precious little girl, Ernestine......... wub.gif
Just like your daddy misses you (as I know you miss him......) We too, miss our Ernie-Bird sad.gif ...

In my heart, I know that all of you precious KIDS are doing okay............. And, I know that you kids
want us all to know that "you're all doing just fine!!!" wub.gif


We know that you're all well.

We just MISS YOU ALL VERY, VERY MUCH!!!!!

Take Care of Each Other until we get up there to walk into Eternity together................Okay????

Love all of you!!!!

Denise, Ben, Ms. Lucy and Mr. Yoster xoxo


--------------------
Our Beloved Girl, Ernestine (AKA) "Ernie-Bird"
April, 1984 - February 7, 2004
***AFFA***
Forever, you will ALWAYS live on in our hearts!
DEPARTED FROM EARTH, NEVER FORGOTTEN.... Love, Mom & Dad xoxoxoxoxo


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"He who is cruel to animals becomes hard also in his dealings with men. We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." Immanuel Kant

"Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight" Albert Schweitzer
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LS Support
post Sep 21 2004, 11:43 PM
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great pic

happy birthday zoey! (wishes a juicy virtual bone up to the bridge for him)


--------------------




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karen424
post Sep 22 2004, 05:39 AM
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Jim,

That was the most beautiful, heartfelt tribute I have ever read. What a special "Little Man" he truly was and so was the bond you had with him. I hope you are able to get your pictures of him, they mean so much.

Happy Birthday Zoey!!

Take care,
Love,
Karen


--------------------
My baby boy Buster - Forever a part of my heart....02/02/89 - 06/18/04

Max my sweet little soul - you filled our life with happiness....you fought the fight so you could be with us. Now it is your time to be at peace.....daddy and I miss you so much! 01/01/93 - 01/01/06
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Muffins
post Oct 5 2004, 12:06 AM
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Hi Jim:

I can see that we are coming up to 7 weeks since our handsome Little Man has gone to Rainbow's Bridge.... wub.gif

He's among the best company, because I know that Little Man is with all of our furkids and "all of God's other beautiful creatures", that have gone on before him.......

Jim........I just want to say that I am soooooooooooo happy that you are on board.. rolleyes.gif You have helped sooooo many people, and I am very, very happy that you are here......

Are you "a writer" naturally????
To me, you always seem to have the very, very perfect thing to say.....
"Writer" or "not"............YOU JUST KNOW WHAT TO SAY.......... That's quite a gift!!!!!!! happy.gif

God Bless you Jim................ biggrin.gif

As my mom has always taught me to say....
Goodnight and God Bless you!!!!!!

Peace, Love, Happiness & Health,

Denise


p.s. I do think of you and Little Man quite often............ I hope that you are doing better each day..... It's one step forward and two steps back, sometimes........ blink.gif
You probably know that by now..............

Talk to you soon!!


--------------------
Our Beloved Girl, Ernestine (AKA) "Ernie-Bird"
April, 1984 - February 7, 2004
***AFFA***
Forever, you will ALWAYS live on in our hearts!
DEPARTED FROM EARTH, NEVER FORGOTTEN.... Love, Mom & Dad xoxoxoxoxo


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"He who is cruel to animals becomes hard also in his dealings with men. We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." Immanuel Kant

"Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight" Albert Schweitzer
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dietersmom
post Oct 5 2004, 07:07 PM
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Hi Jim,
I love your tribute to your "little man" Zoey. What a special bond you two had and still have, because I know he lives on in your heart and your memories. I hope one day to be able to write something for Dieter. Right now, all the memories just bring so many tears that I can't quite dig down that deep yet. Tomorrow is 4 weeks for me and 7 for you, looks like we share Wednesdays! I never knew I'd count weeks like this, but each one gets just a little easier, and I think more of the happy times rather than the emptiness. Isn't it amazing how a furry little creature can crawl into your heart and bring a love so immeasureable biggrin.gif

Thinking of you
Libby


--------------------
Dieter you will live in our hearts forever
May 25,1990 - September 8,2004

"Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth."
-- Genesis 9:16
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zoeysdad
post Oct 29 2004, 02:42 AM
Post #12





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 281
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Member No.: 448



Hey Little Man,

It's been a little over nine weeks since you left this earth and I miss you so much. It seems like an eternity since I held you in my arms and the reality of it all is so hard to accept.

I just wanted you to know how much I miss you and I wanted to thank you for making the almost twelve years we had together the most happiest years of my life.

My love always,
__Dad


--------------------
"Daddies Little Man"
September 22, 1992 -- August 18, 2004

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Steph
post Oct 29 2004, 07:07 AM
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Hey Jim,

I've been reading about your "Little Man". That's quite a story about how you two got together. I'm sure he looked really adorable riding the tractor. The country guy and the Lhaso Apso - what a pair! That's really neat.

He sounds like he was your "Soul Mate Dog", like Luba was mine. It's really hard when they go, but it does get better.

Take care - Steph

BTW - My Luba's nickname was "Little Dog"


--------------------
"My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today."
- Watership Down, Richard Adams
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dietersmom
post Oct 29 2004, 08:49 AM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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From: Atlanta, GA
Member No.: 473



Jim,
I know how much you miss Zoey and I'm sorry. If it's any consolation, I'm right there behind you. I'm at the seven week mark and still shed tears. Like Step said, he was your little "soul mate dog", such a special "little man".

Just thinking about you
Libby


--------------------
Dieter you will live in our hearts forever
May 25,1990 - September 8,2004

"Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth."
-- Genesis 9:16
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Steph
post Oct 29 2004, 11:10 AM
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QUOTE (dietersmom @ Oct 29 2004, 08:49 AM)
I'm at the seven week mark and still shed tears.

I'm almost at five months, and cry for her fairly often. Just last night I totally broke down. A lady on my street whose dog died over six months ago also still cries for her dog.

It's tough, but it does get better.


--------------------
"My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today."
- Watership Down, Richard Adams
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zoeysdad
post Oct 30 2004, 01:01 AM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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Thanks Steph and Libby for your kind words of support. It is strange how we are all still counting the weeks/months since we lost our beloved pets. Someone posted here once that you should expect to grieve for about one month for every one year that you had your pet. If that's true, then I still have at least ten more months to go. There probably is some truth to that statement, but I don't believe the grieving will ever completely end. How could it? I know I'll never stop wanting to have my Little Man back, but I do like to believe this knife-like pain I'm currently feeling will at least fade to a dull ache some day. I suppose it's the best we can hope for when we consider just how much our wonderul pets meant to us.

__Jim


--------------------
"Daddies Little Man"
September 22, 1992 -- August 18, 2004

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Steph
post Oct 30 2004, 05:51 PM
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I don't know about the months per year thing. Luba died much younger than the norm. It was just after her ninth birthday. I don't think I'll be ok after nine months.

I think Luba's vet was closer to the truth: he said that it depends on the person. For people like myself, and others like myself (eg people on this site) the connection to the pet is so deep that it could take a year or more in order to come to terms with the grief. That doesn't mean that you'll have the stabbing knife the whole time, but it won't be easy. He said that he himself had gone through this kind of grief himself.

In addition, it depends on how the pet died. In cases of sudden death, the accute denial stage will linger longer (God, I can attest to that!). Those who have to put their pet to sleep will have lingering feelings of doubt ("did I do it to soon").

Anyways, here I ramble on. In truth, I don't think that I'll ever get over losing my "Little Dog". sad.gif


--------------------
"My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today."
- Watership Down, Richard Adams
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CheriAnn
post Nov 1 2004, 08:22 AM
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Hi Jim,

This is the first time I have read your tribute. What a beautiful heart felt tribute! He certainly was a special Little Man. Your story brings tears at the pain and sadness of his sudden illness, then smiles with your cute stories.

You are just as special, for taking him in and giving him such a great life wub.gif

Cheri


--------------------
Rachael Ann
November 18, 1992 - October 2, 2004

My best friend, my daughter, my life
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Ann H
post Nov 14 2004, 12:47 AM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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Hi Jim, I cried many tear reading about Little Man he sounds like he was such a wonderful companion. My heart goes out to you for the wonderful love that you had.
Ann


--------------------

My girls went to the Rainbow Bridge 6 weeks and 3 days apart.
Snookie had cushing's disease, and later developed diabetes. Both had cancer, Snookie had cancer of the liver, and Chili Bean had cancer of the pallet. Chili Bean was our son's chihuahua but we kept her often throughout her life and she stayed with us for the last 9 months of her life. Chili Bean also had asthma and heart failure. We will see you in Heaven my precious darlings.


Snookie Lynn Howard
2-04-94 - 12-26-04


Senorita Chili Bean Bubbles Howard
11-05-94 - 11-11-04
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zoeysdad
post Nov 25 2004, 08:59 AM
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Hey Little Man,

It's Thanksgiving Day....my first in eleven years without you and I miss you so much. Who is going to help me devour the endless amounts of left-overs that my family always insists on sending home with me? I could always count on you to rise to the challenge....you usually ended up eating all the turkey and ham and I was left with all the desserts.....only after you realized all the meat was gone would you then focus on the sweets. Most of the time during your last few years with me, I tried to not give you too much of the foods the vet said you shouldn't have, but the holidays were different....I'd indulge you with whatever you wanted.

Thanksgiving is a time when we are suppose to give thanks for the blessings in our lives and that would put you at the top of my list of [people] to thank. It's difficult to find words sufficient enough to describe just how much you meant to me. I can say without a doubt that you made me feel more special and loved than any of the people in my life....but I guess it's really unfair of me to expect people to show love in a way that only an animal can....we humans always fall far short when placed in comparison.

For almost twelve years, I had the priviledge of sharing my life with you and I wouldn't trade the time we had together for anything in the world. I wish our time together had lasted much longer but even though you're not physically present anymore, your memory and all the great lessons you taught me remain. I'm a much better person for having known you and I will continue to strive to elevate myself to your level when it comes to showing love and making people feel special.

Thank you, Little Man, for being my best friend and for showing me what's really important in life and what's not. I'll cherish your memory always.


--------------------
"Daddies Little Man"
September 22, 1992 -- August 18, 2004

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