Its Been A Week

Well folks, its been a week since Tripper died. I thank whole heartedly the very few people who took the time to give me some support. Your words were a lifesaver in those first couple of days.
I came to this site because I was desperately trying to cope, with loss, with guilt, with pain.
Unfortunately it took over a day before I was even allowed access, and then the few posts I wrote were largely ignored. It is disheartening, but none the less I have made it through and I will now leave this site and go on with my life.

To all new folks: I feel your pain. I would suggest finding a friend or family member near you to lean on because you probably will spend most of your time here waiting to here responses that never come, and it will only make you feel more alone, as it did me.

libby

There Is No Word For Goodbye

Hi all, I posted this in the eulogy section but it seems more people visit this section and I really wanted this to be read.....

One of the indigenous tribes in Alaska are the Athabascans. This is a lovely poem that describes how they feel about goodbye, and although I'm not Athabascan, it is exactly how I feel about my Tripper dog.

There Is No Word For Goodbye
Mary TallMountain

Sokoya, I said looking through
the net of wrinkles into
wise black pools
of her eyes.
What do you say in Athabascan
when you leave each other?
What is the word
for goodbye?
A shade of feeling rippled
the wind- tanned skin,
Ah, nothing, she said,
watching the river flash.
She looked at me close.
We just say Tlaa. That means,
See you.
We never leave each other.
When does your mouth
say goodbye to your heart?
She touched me light
as a bluebell.
You forget when you leave us;
you're so small then.
We don't use that word.
We always think you're coming back,
but if you don't
we'll see you someplace else.
You understand.
There is no word for goodbye.


I will not say goodbye to you my sweet Tripper dog, I will only say Tlaa.
I hope there are many harmless little cars for you to chase around in the place where you are going.
I hope it rains Tripper treats there and that an angel will be forever scratching behind your ears.
I will not forget your droopy eyes and that little sprout of soft golden hair on top of your head that const*ituted your entire winter coat.
I will not forget how happy you always were to see me, to see anyone.
You weren't much of a guard dog,.. more of a welcome dog. You would have gladly let a burgler into our home and showed him around, played a little frisbee with him.
I will chuckle with the memory of the dog catcher telling me how you had run right up to his van and jumped in. My God how you loved people, my God how you loved this life.
I will miss you my sweet, beautiful boy but I will not say goodbye. There is no word for goodbye.

BTW-the dog catcher story was years ago, I'll tell it another time in a different post.....it's hilarious.

There Is No Word For Goodbye...

One of the indigenous tribes in Alaska are the Athabascans. This is a lovely poem that describes how they feel about goodbye, and although I'm not Athabascan, it is exactly how I feel about my Tripper dog.


There Is No Word For Goodbye
Mary TallMountain

Sokoya, I said looking through
the net of wrinkles into
wise black pools
of her eyes.
What do you say in Athabascan
when you leave each other?
What is the word
for goodbye?
A shade of feeling rippled
the wind- tanned skin,
Ah, nothing, she said,
watching the river flash.
She looked at me close.
We just say Ttaa. That means,
See you.
We never leave each other.
When does your mouth
say goodbye to your heart?
She touched me light
as a bluebell.
You forget when you leave us;
you're so small then.
We don't use that word.
We always think you're coming back,
but if you don't
we'll see you someplace else.
You understand.
There is no word for goodbye.


I will not say goodbye to you my sweet Tripper dog, I will only say Ttaa.
I hope there are many harmless little cars for you to chase around in the place where you are going.
I hope it rains Tripper treats there and that an angel will be forever scratching behind your ears.
I will not forget your droopy eyes and that little sprout of soft golden hair on top of your head that const*ituted your entire winter coat.
I will not forget how happy you always were to see me, to see anyone.
You weren't much of a guard dog,.. more of a welcome dog. You would have gladly let a burgler into our home and showed him around, played a little frisbee with him.
I will chuckle with the memory of the dog catcher telling me how you had run right up to his van and jumped in. My God how you loved people, my God how you loved this life.
I will miss you my sweet, beautiful boy but I will not say goodbye. There is no word for goodbye.

Best Friends

I didn't have a particularly geat chilhood, not that I'm complaining about that, I was fed and clothed and I made to adulthood intact. I'm too old to be bitter about it anymore, it's just the way it is. The reason I bring this up is because although my parents weren't always present when I was a little girl, there was always an animal nearby to love.

We always had at least one cat, and sometimes a dog. They were my constant companions as I grew through the years. This is how I came to view them as friends, not just pets. Truth be told, I like animals more than I like most people. They never have an agenda, they are genuine and you don't ever have to worry about their intentions toward you, their intentions are always honorable. Even in the wild, if an animal intends to eat you, it is honorable, not twisted.

Anyway, there are people out there who don't feel this affinity for animals and I consider this to be their loss. My own partner doesn't care for them as I do, but he cares for me, so he "puts up with them", and no matter what he says, I saw a tear in his eye the night my sweet Tripper left us.

I'm only writing this post because I want people to know that I understand this attachment we make to our furry friends, and how it comes to be. If you have recently lost a friend as I have, I feel your pain. But I'll give the same advice that I've been so kindly given. Know that they loved you unconditionally and no matter what. If you feel guilt, just keep this in mind: animals are too pure to be aware of this concept, they loved you, they knew they were loved, and they do not want you to be sad. So smile, remember the good times with your furry friends and keep that wonderfulness in your heart. It is their gift to you, for you to keep always.

-Namaste-

New Here, A Hard Goodbye

I'm so glad I found this sight, just because I need to know there are people out there who understand the heartbreak of losing a pet. My dog was almost nine years old, I'd had him since he was five weeks. He was a sweet dog with the heart of a puppy but he was very hyper and difficult to control. I always felt I had failed him because I was never able to train him to come when he was loose. Because of this, he spent the last year of his life tied. He had a 20 foot run outside and a dog house. He spent the nights indoors, but even so , we often had to tie him to a leash indoors as he was an escape artist and would run for it as soon as he caught sight of the door opening. The reason for this, simply because he loved to chase cars I didn't want him to get hurt or god forbid, hurt someone else.
Sunday afternoon, the sun was shining and it was beautiful outside. The snow was melting and the birds were chirping, I couldn't take it anymore. What harm could there be in letting the old boy run for awhile? Two hours after he got loose there was a knock at the door. He finally caught a car. He wasn't dead but he was injured so badly he couldn't move and was choking on his own blood. We had no choice but to put him down. We live out in the country and the vet is a good 20 miles away, he wouldn't have made it so we had to do it ourselves, then we had to build a fire. It was absolutely heartbreaking. I've been crying for two days. I feel like I failed him, like I didn't give him enough time or attention, like I had no business owning such a beautiful sweet creature when I was ill equipped to care for him properly. I thought of finding him a home a couple of years ago but I realized that someone else would be inheriting all his bad habits and he was mine and that wouldn't be right.
Poor Tripper dog, I will miss you so, I did love you and I am so sorry if I ever neglected or hurt you. I hope you are free now bubba boy. I loved you and you didn't deserve to die like this.
How will I get over this?