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jazmin
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vancouver bc canada
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Joined: 12-November 06
Profile Views: 775*
Last Seen: 9th January 2007 - 10:24 PM
Local Time: Mar 28 2024, 06:58 AM
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20 Nov 2006
I just can't believe it? I just can't. How is it that he's really gone? That I won't be able to give him belly rubs, or put my hand under his little head (he always loved that sometimes I wold just let him sleep like that). He had the most amazing personality, so intellegent and regal, so loving and so so sweet. How is it that I don't get to see him anymore.
I come home and want ot call his name, I go into my bedroom and think I will see him there on the bed. My best friend is know gone, my baby, I know they say it will get easier but how does it he was in my life since I was 11 years old I'm now 26, that's most of my life at this point. I seem to cry at any little thing, watching **, or shows that I use to distract myself, death is always there i seem to see it screaming at me. I put a good face on to friends as I dont 'want them to see just how heartbroken I really am. I was in an almost fatal car accident last year and have grown very good at putting on a face. I want people around me to have fun, have a good time, I try and laugh, it's so hard. There will never be another Zack as long as I live, I just can't believe he's gone. xxJaz
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12 Nov 2006
He's 15 and has been battling cancer for the last 5 years. This last year has been the worst, the cancer is skin cancer which has taken his nose and eye, it has now spread internally to his leg, and I feel is in his head. I have tried everything but still feel like I should have done more. He's on pallative care now taking opiates (tramadol) a cat on opiates is this right? He's different, my sweet little man he's been through too much what animal deserves this? I feel like I just can't let him suffer any longer it's just not right. He never leaves his box these days and hisses at himself, I had to spoon feed him today, why have I even let it go this far? Who am I doing this for? What kind of life is this? He does purrr, he's just so sweet aside from all he goes though. I love him so much, and I just want him to be happy. I realize that that won't happen in this life, I just wish he would pass on on his own but I don't think it will happen soon enough and at what cost does he have to go through. I left a message with the vet and I hope to arrange to put him down for weds. Here's a question I can't decide if I should have the vet come here or if I should bring him to the vet. Any thoughts on that would be nice.
Thank you for reading what I have to say, i am just going to miss him so much. Jazmin PS This picture was taken about 4-5 months ago, I can't bare to put a new photo of him up here.
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