I'm Heartbroken!, Lost kitty Options

[RitainMN]

Our gorgeous cat, Louie, has disappeared from our neighborhood. We live on the end of a cul-de-sac with no busy streets, and all of our cats have been let out daily for awhile. Louie never came home this past Tuesday. I've done EVERYTHING to find him - you name it. There's nothing more I can do, and I miss him horribly - as does his buddy here at home, Leo. Jasmine, who is a 22 year old tortie, doesn't miss him - she only got along with one other cat in her life, Lester, and she has way outlived him.

Louie was my baby - I called him my "little ray of sunshine," because I suffer from several ailments, including clinical depression, type II diabetes, bad osteoarthritis, and Crohn's disease. All are pretty well under control now, except for the awful depression, which has made Louie's loss unbearable. I took the day off from work the day after he disappeared to put up flyers at some businesses, deliver them to homes, call the Humane Society, the microchip company, three local vets' offices, and just cry my eyes out. I still call for him every morning and every evening, but I cry after that. He was such a loving cat, and following me from room to room when he was in, slept with me, purred madly with me, stood up against the kitchen counter and waved his paw at me when I was getting ready to feed him, played with Leo - I just miss him so much I can't stand it. With depression, something like this is just unbearable, as I said. I've seen my therapist, and called the psychiatrist who prescribed my recent medication. I emailed four friends on Friday asking them to please call me this weekend if they get a chance and told them why. Only two have called so far, and only one was helpful. As you all know, many people just don't get it when a pet dies or is lost. The man I work with started making little jokes until I flat-out told him, "It's NOT funny." Now he's been nicer.

I have a husband and two adult children who are living at home now due to the economy. My husband works 12 hour shifts plus every other weekend, many nights, so I rarely see him. I am taking this so hard, I'm sure, because when we had to euthanize two other cats we loved, they were very sick, older, and deserved to be relieved of their pain. With Louie, he was 5 1/2 years old, healthy as an ox, muscular, 16 pounds, had all his claws, was a good tree-climber (we have lots of trees around our neighborhood) and could defend himself well, I'm sure. He is microchipped, and my only hope now is that someone took him in and will eventually take him either to a shelter or to their own vet, and his microchip will be checked. It's been 4 days now, and I'm not even functioning well.

I guess I just had to get all of this off my chest and I figured people on this forum would totally understand my grief and sense of helplessness. Thanks for letting me vent!

Rita in MN

[Zita'sMom]

Rita

I do understand all that you are going through and I know the pain of not knowing.

My cat Zita went missing October last year and although inside I know she is in spirit, we never did find her. Like you I did everything imaginable including going door to door in the whole neighbourhood and with posters, etc, etc, etc.

I also understand when you speak of your "ray of sunshine". Zita was my ray of sunshine and was her brother Zeus's constant companion.

I do hope Louie shows up somehow. I heard many stories of cats returning, days, weeks or even months later.

I ended up getting a new companion for Zeus, Ziggy. She was my "helper" kitty - with an oh so special purr of gratitude that made everyone laugh. Ziggy was senselessly shot and died in August of this year so the grief has really compounded for me. Ziggy was also a ray of sunshine and there are things in this life that just seem so unfair. These losses have affected me profoundly, more than most people can understand.

It has helped me to post here at the forum.

I send you many positive thoughts in hope that your Louie will return to you.

Wishing you the best possible outcome.

((((hugs))))

Jan.

[RitainMN]

Thank you SO much, Jan, for your reply. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of two of your cats - you must still be hurting.... There is nothing more I can do to find Louie. I think the only possibilities at this time are that he was killed by a fox or coyote (though neither has been heard lately), or he was taken in by someone who thought he was a stray, and they decided not to bring him to a vet for scanning of his microchip. It's getting cold here now, so I hold out very little hope, after 6 days. I pray and cry - nothing more I can do. One of our other cats, Leo, misses him terribly, too, and is very affectionate with me now, and looks out the patio door for Louie. I don't know how I can function normally at work again tomorrow, especially since I'm in straight commission sales.

Again, my condolences on your cats, Jan. I hope you've found some peace...

Rita

[Zita'sMom]

Hi Rita

I know well that point where there is nothing more you can do to find Louie. I went for weeks, banging on doors, putting up posters, calling the pound, the SPCA... and I never found anything. You can torture yourself (and everyone else in your life) with continual searching....

I found out that where we live cougars roam at night. There are also, as I have discovered, human predators, but Zita went missing at night which points more to the natural predators. It is so hard when a body is never found. Some day I hope to know exactly what happened. I do hope very much to know while I am still here on earth.

People have a sort of "get over it" attitude about cats. No-one would ever act like this if it were their spouse or their child who had gone missing. The world needs a lot of education about the special roles our furbabies have in our lives. They are precious, pure, and genuine. Our pets could teach us human species an awful lot, if the humans would just pay attention.

With hope, if your Louie has been taken in as a stray, perhaps a vet will check for a microchip one day. My Zita was being treated for crystals and I thought that if she did get taken in, eventually someone would have her to a vet and they would see her tattoo. However, she just "disappeared". The world is sometimes not fair...

I understand the pain of seeing Leo looking out the patio door for Louie. For days, Zita's brother Zeus would go down onto our fields searching for her. You can see in my pic how Zeus and Zita loved each other. I have many photos like that. Zeus was a bit happier when we brought Ziggy home, but I think now he is just resigned to being alone. Although the loss to him has been profound - and he won't come in my office where Ziggy spent her last days injured - I think our pets adapt to change much better than we do.

I wish you the best at work - I have no great words of advice there since I have not been very functional since Ziggy's passing. I "do" everything, mostly, but the spark is not there. I guess time is the great healer, though I will never, ever forget my special orange tabby girls. They were indeed my rays of sunshine as you said, and such a great healing influence in my life. I hope that maybe one day I will be able to have another "healing" special kitty, or perhaps Zita and Ziggy could re-incarnate back to me - that is my selfish wish.... Right now I have to just accept the loss.

Sending you much love and healing in your situation with Louie and wishing you the best possible outcome...

take care

Jan.

Thank you SO much, Jan, for your reply. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of two of your cats - you must still be hurting.... There is nothing more I can do to find Louie. I think the only possibilities at this time are that he was killed by a fox or coyote (though neither has been heard lately), or he was taken in by someone who thought he was a stray, and they decided not to bring him to a vet for scanning of his microchip. It's getting cold here now, so I hold out very little hope, after 6 days. I pray and cry - nothing more I can do. One of our other cats, Leo, misses him terribly, too, and is very affectionate with me now, and looks out the patio door for Louie. I don't know how I can function normally at work again tomorrow, especially since I'm in straight commission sales.

Again, my condolences on your cats, Jan. I hope you've found some peace...

Rita

[ann]

Hi Rita, I feel your heartbreak as if it were my own. We can only hope they will find their way back. Many years ago I had a cat that went missing for 16 days. She came home with a dislocated hip. I had just given up all hope. Hopefully Louie is just on a little adventure. I so believe cats need to have their freedom and love to see them outdoors. However, it is dangerous, I know this, and yet have a hard time keeping them in. I lost my Arthur in June. He may have been hit by a car. I worried more so of the preditors. Because of us humans developing every square inch of land we see, these wild animals have no place to go but to roam in our backyards. It's a sad reality. Keep checking the want ads. I was looking at them one day and came across a found cat add. They had brought it to a shelter. Then I saw a lost cat add that matched exactly. I wanted to call them, but I'm sure they were checking everyday. I hope to hear some good news from you soon. Funny thing, I had a dream last night and my hairdresser was in it. Her name is Rita. I hope that's a good sign for you. Sending out some good karma. My prayers are with you and Louie. Hugs.. Ann

[Sassy Girl]

Our gorgeous cat, Louie, has disappeared from our neighborhood. We live on the end of a cul-de-sac with no busy streets, and all of our cats have been let out daily for awhile. Louie never came home this past Tuesday. I've done EVERYTHING to find him - you name it. There's nothing more I can do, and I miss him horribly - as does his buddy here at home, Leo. Jasmine, who is a 22 year old tortie, doesn't miss him - she only got along with one other cat in her life, Lester, and she has way outlived him.

Louie was my baby - I called him my "little ray of sunshine," because I suffer from several ailments, including clinical depression, type II diabetes, bad osteoarthritis, and Crohn's disease. All are pretty well under control now, except for the awful depression, which has made Louie's loss unbearable. I took the day off from work the day after he disappeared to put up flyers at some businesses, deliver them to homes, call the Humane Society, the microchip company, three local vets' offices, and just cry my eyes out. I still call for him every morning and every evening, but I cry after that. He was such a loving cat, and following me from room to room when he was in, slept with me, purred madly with me, stood up against the kitchen counter and waved his paw at me when I was getting ready to feed him, played with Leo - I just miss him so much I can't stand it. With depression, something like this is just unbearable, as I said. I've seen my therapist, and called the psychiatrist who prescribed my recent medication. I emailed four friends on Friday asking them to please call me this weekend if they get a chance and told them why. Only two have called so far, and only one was helpful. As you all know, many people just don't get it when a pet dies or is lost. The man I work with started making little jokes until I flat-out told him, "It's NOT funny." Now he's been nicer.

I have a husband and two adult children who are living at home now due to the economy. My husband works 12 hour shifts plus every other weekend, many nights, so I rarely see him. I am taking this so hard, I'm sure, because when we had to euthanize two other cats we loved, they were very sick, older, and deserved to be relieved of their pain. With Louie, he was 5 1/2 years old, healthy as an ox, muscular, 16 pounds, had all his claws, was a good tree-climber (we have lots of trees around our neighborhood) and could defend himself well, I'm sure. He is microchipped, and my only hope now is that someone took him in and will eventually take him either to a shelter or to their own vet, and his microchip will be checked. It's been 4 days now, and I'm not even functioning well.

I guess I just had to get all of this off my chest and I figured people on this forum would totally understand my grief and sense of helplessness. Thanks for letting me vent!

Rita in MN

Hi, Rita
I am so sorry about your missing fur baby.

Have checked with the place that you had the micro chip put in at.

My Sassy Girl went missing this past January. She had a micro chip in her. I never have found her. I let her out about 5:00 am went for my walk around my condo complex and came back home. She would always be in before I left for work at 7:30 every once in awhile she would not come in so her grandmom would have to come down to get her in. But that moring I knew something was not right. I calle my mom in tears and she came down to help me. I went to work in tear's. I was up all night makeing flyers and past them out. Sassy was a very frendly cat and in my group of cond's everyone knew her and they knew that I was Sassy's mom. As I was passing out my flayers and looking for her I found out that Coyet's had been seen haning around. So I think that is what happend to her. I still have dream's of her at my back patio door wanting in.

I would just love that dream to come true. She might not be to happy to see that she would have a brother to share with.
I could not take not having a fur baby around me. At first I was not going to get another on because it is just so hard to lose them. Even worse not knowing for sure what happend. But I realized that life goes on and I have my really good memories of her.

Now I have a little boy named Rascal and his name fit's him to a T.

I will say a prayer for you and your fur baby. Please keep us informed. Come in and just let it all out.


Take care
Sandy

[RitainMN]

Hi, Rita
I am so sorry about your missing fur baby.

Have checked with the place that you had the micro chip put in at.

My Sassy Girl went missing this past January. She had a micro chip in her. I never have found her. I let her out about 5:00 am went for my walk around my condo complex and came back home. She would always be in before I left for work at 7:30 every once in awhile she would not come in so her grandmom would have to come down to get her in. But that moring I knew something was not right. I calle my mom in tears and she came down to help me. I went to work in tear's. I was up all night makeing flyers and past them out. Sassy was a very frendly cat and in my group of cond's everyone knew her and they knew that I was Sassy's mom. As I was passing out my flayers and looking for her I found out that Coyet's had been seen haning around. So I think that is what happend to her. I still have dream's of her at my back patio door wanting in.

I would just love that dream to come true. She might not be to happy to see that she would have a brother to share with.
I could not take not having a fur baby around me. At first I was not going to get another on because it is just so hard to lose them. Even worse not knowing for sure what happend. But I realized that life goes on and I have my really good memories of her.

Now I have a little boy named Rascal and his name fit's him to a T.

I will say a prayer for you and your fur baby. Please keep us informed. Come in and just let it all out.


Take care
Sandy

[RitainMN]

Hi Sandy,

Thanks so much for the email. My son and I just got home from driving around the neighborhood behind us where he apparently hung out sometimes. I called his name, then we'd drive on a ways, and I'd call him again. We stopped and I talked to whomever I saw outside, but none had seen Louie. We, too, have been known to have coyotes and foxes around here, but Louie was a 16 pound, muscular guy with all of his claws, and he climbed trees well. I just don't know.....maybe someone took him in and decided to keep him. Yes, he was microchipped, and I've called all the local vets, humane society, emergency vet clinic, put up flyers in the neighborhood stores, put an ad in the local weekly paper and, just today, in the Minneapolis newspaper. There is absolutely nothing more I can do but grieve. Tonight, I'm going to a pet loss grief group at the Humane Society - it meets twice a month there. I hope that helps a bit.....

I'm so sorry about your fur-baby. My husband won't let me get another one if he doesn't come back, because we still have a 22 year old tortie and a 15 year old Maine Coon boy....I need something new to cheer me up if Louie doesn't come home.....

Rita in MN

[RitainMN]

Hi Rita, I feel your heartbreak as if it were my own. We can only hope they will find their way back. Many years ago I had a cat that went missing for 16 days. She came home with a dislocated hip. I had just given up all hope. Hopefully Louie is just on a little adventure. I so believe cats need to have their freedom and love to see them outdoors. However, it is dangerous, I know this, and yet have a hard time keeping them in. I lost my Arthur in June. He may have been hit by a car. I worried more so of the preditors. Because of us humans developing every square inch of land we see, these wild animals have no place to go but to roam in our backyards. It's a sad reality. Keep checking the want ads. I was looking at them one day and came across a found cat add. They had brought it to a shelter. Then I saw a lost cat add that matched exactly. I wanted to call them, but I'm sure they were checking everyday. I hope to hear some good news from you soon. Funny thing, I had a dream last night and my hairdresser was in it. Her name is Rita. I hope that's a good sign for you. Sending out some good karma. My prayers are with you and Louie. Hugs.. Ann

[RitainMN]

Hi Ann,

Thanks so very much for your email. I'm still devastated. See my post today replying to someone else on the forum about my son and I driving around the neighborhood just now, calling his name, and asking people who were outside if they'd seen him. Nothing.....We have coyotes & foxes, though neither has been seen lately in these parts. I'm going to a pet loss grief support group tonight at the humane society - it meets twice a month. Maybe it will help.....

Rita in MN

[goliath]

Rita,
I send my prayers and hopes that Louie finds his way home soon. Sometimes cats come home weeks or even months after they go out adventuring. Hopefully between LS and your home support group you'll get the help you need to get through this difficult time.

Hugs of comfort,
Beth

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Rita, if you're near a school, you might want to talk with the principal about posting flyers on a bulletin board there. Kids always seem to know what's going on in the neighborhood. Best of luck, Kim

[RitainMN]

Rita, if you're near a school, you might want to talk with the principal about posting flyers on a bulletin board there. Kids always seem to know what's going on in the neighborhood. Best of luck, Kim

[RitainMN]

That's a good idea, Ann. The nearest school is a high school, and I doubt they'd let me post there. There is a middle school about 2 miles away which I could try. I was called by Pet Finders today and paid them $59 to plot 10 blocks around our house and call every house they can reach to try to find Louie. I'm desperate, but I fear he's dead. I went to the local Humane Society last night, where they have a pet loss grief support group that meets every Monday night. The others didn't show up, so it was just me and the counselor, so I got 1.5 hours of free pet loss counseling, which was helpful.

[RitainMN]

Rita, if you're near a school, you might want to talk with the principal about posting flyers on a bulletin board there. Kids always seem to know what's going on in the neighborhood. Best of luck, Kim

[RitainMN]

Shoot - I meant to type Kim, not Ann - sorry about that! I'm very new to this forum, and haven't quite figured out how it works, technically, yet! Where is LS based? US or UK?

[RitainMN]

Rita,
I send my prayers and hopes that Louie finds his way home soon. Sometimes cats come home weeks or even months after they go out adventuring. Hopefully between LS and your home support group you'll get the help you need to get through this difficult time.

Hugs of comfort,
Beth

[RitainMN]

Thanks so much, Beth. I don't think the rest of my family is grieving about Louie as much as I am. In fact, I know they aren't. But to me, pets are fur-children and deserve the same respect and love as a child. Their loss is almost as great as a person. In fact, I am grieving more for this loss than my parents and MIL. I think that is because they were quite old, sick, and ready to go, and it was almost a blessing that they were relieved of their bodies. I have no idea what happened to my Louie, and I may never know. I know you've all been through this before and have felt the same pain.

[goliath]

But to me, pets are fur-children and deserve the same respect and love as a child. Their loss is almost as great as a person. In fact, I am grieving more for this loss than my parents and MIL.

I feel the same way Rita. No matter what the outer shell of a sweet little soul looks like, it's the content of what's inside that we fall in love with. We care for our furkids in the same way we care for human children. Always tending to their every need. They depend on us for food, water and shelter......and ask for no more. We give them lots of love and they love us in return.

I completely understand how deep the grief is first hand. The blow I endured when my Goliath passed away so suddenly put me completely out of commission. Never in my life had I experienced such enormous amounts of pain and depression. That includes when my parents both died in their 50's, not much older than I am now. I loved both my parents very much but did not carry the burden of sadness and grief nearly as deep nor with such the intensity as when Goliath passed way.

My little Browser went missing when he was just 8 weeks old. We live in a heaving wooded area on a lake. Many thought Browser would not make it through the cold night in the cold rain. Some thought if the temperatures didn't get him the foxen or coyotes would. I never lost hope and prayed God would keep His watchful eyes over Browser and keep him safe and sound. He did find his way home and I thank God every day that he did. Browser's miracle rescue is posted in this section if you care to read it. His story is truly a miracle of faith and trust.

I continue to keep you and Louie in my heart and prayers. Sometimes miracles do happen when we believe.

Hugs,
Beth

[RitainMN]

I feel the same way Rita. No matter what the outer shell of a sweet little soul looks like, it's the content of what's inside that we fall in love with. We care for our furkids in the same way we care for human children. Always tending to their every need. They depend on us for food, water and shelter......and ask for no more. We give them lots of love and they love us in return.

I completely understand how deep the grief is first hand. The blow I endured when my Goliath passed away so suddenly put me completely out of commission. Never in my life had I experienced such enormous amounts of pain and depression. That includes when my parents both died in their 50's, not much older than I am now. I loved both my parents very much but did not carry the burden of sadness and grief nearly as deep nor with such the intensity as when Goliath passed way.

My little Browser went missing when he was just 8 weeks old. We live in a heaving wooded area on a lake. Many thought Browser would not make it through the cold night in the cold rain. Some thought if the temperatures didn't get him the foxen or coyotes would. I never lost hope and prayed God would keep His watchful eyes over Browser and keep him safe and sound. He did find his way home and I thank God every day that he did. Browser's miracle rescue is posted in this section if you care to read it. His story is truly a miracle of faith and trust.

I continue to keep you and Louie in my heart and prayers. Sometimes miracles do happen when we believe.

Hugs,
Beth