Lost Mishka And I'm Slowly Falling Apart...

I lost my beautiful 6 year old cat Mishka on June 18th (I've attached some pictures). The one of her when she's all fuzzy is when she was still only 8 weeks old. </3

She is an indoor cat but we'd let her out occassionally for fresh air. Usually she would just sit in the backyard and stare at the sky. She never wandered far. At first I didn't wanna believe she was lost. The first night she went missing I woke up every two hours looking out the backyard door to see if maybe she had come back. Unfortunately there was no sign of her...

Since then I've put up flyers, walked the neighbourhood for hours at a time calling out her name, talked to neighbours, called shelters to see if they had found her, called the road crews and even talked to an animal communicator.

She was spotted a few days after she went missing by someone in our neighbourhood. It was around 1 in the morning in a large field that used to be farmland. He called me and I had no way of getting to the field ... my parents wouldn't hear of it. I asked him to see if he could catch her but she only ran away and then disappered into the field. The next morning I woke up at 5 and went looking for her in the muddy thorny area. I didn't find her.

Everyday I feel a little more broken.

My family hasn't been that supportive. They were never attached to Mishka. I on the other hand grew up alongside her. I had her since I was 13... since I was in middle school.. and now I've turned nineteen and I'm entering my second year of university.

I wake up every morning and still expect her to be sleeping right beside me.

I've looked everywhere. The search has been so lonely and it's ripping me apart.
I'd recently started to recover from clinical depression, but all of this has pushed me into an extreme relapse.
I've not been sleeping. I've lost weight.

Recently I got an email from a lady saying she had found Mishka. She turned out to be a scam who was only after my money.

You guys seem like a supportive community who understands... please tell me what to do.

I miss her so much.
I don't know to hold myself together.
I don't know what to do.