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> Heartbroken
baileysmama
post Aug 15 2014, 04:15 PM
Post #1





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 16
Joined: 19-June 13
From: Tennessee
Member No.: 8,018



It's been a while since I was here; but after the events that took place Wednesday evening, I need to be someplace where I am understood. This time, the loss was not my own fur baby (although the pain and the sorrow are still as fresh as that day), but my friend/neighbor/partner in crime's beloved Fred. Fred was a sweet kitty; my neighbor rescued him from a no-kill shelter, and he was so happy in his furr-ever home. He was an older kitty, but he loved to snuggle, play, and be loved. Fred would come over when his Mama went out of town, and he and Bailey were buddies (until my beloved Bailey left us in June of 2013). I was his aunt, and my fur babies were his cousins. We knew Fred was starting to show signs of getting older, but he was still full of life and happy. Wednesday morning he was loving on us, purring away, and everything was normal...

Wednesday evening, my son, Nick (19), and I went to Wednesday evening service at church. Our neighbor was at choir rehearsal, and I was expecting to hear from her to figure out what time we were getting together Thursday morning for coffee before I took Fred to the vet for his pedicure. Nick and I had been home about 15 minutes when the phone rang. It was my friend, and I answered the phone with a funny greeting. She was on the phone telling me something that I couldn't understand because she was crying so hard (she is one of the strongest women I know, so this was not normal for her at all). I asked her to repeat what she said..."I think Fred is dead." I headed out the door and was barging through her door in less than a minute. I asked where he was. She was sobbing. She led me back to where her son's room was (he had moved out a couple years ago after college), and knelt down by the bed, just crying. I got down on the floor, looked under the bed, and knew. Sweet Fred was gone. I heard my son, and looked at my friend, whose eyes were pleading with me to tell her something different. I got out "I'm so sorry." It was awful. I had my son take his "Aunt" to the living room while I got my sweet furry nephew out from under the bed. He had been there for a little bit; he was starting to get stiff. I asked for a blanket, and my friend brought me Fred's favorite blanket. After I wrapped him up, I carried him out of the room. She held out her arms, and I placed him in his Mama's arms. She cradled him to her chest and just sobbed. My heart broke. I tried to stay strong but I couldn't. I know that pain; I know that sorrow. She looked at me with tears streaming down her cheeks and asked me if it looked like anything was wrong. I told her no. He was on his side. We think he had a stroke or a heart attack. He would've been 11 this October.

Seeing my friend so broken, knowing that pain all too well, ripped open the wound from losing my Bailey. Fred was also a part of our family, and my heart hurts for my friend. Can someone tell me what to do; how to help my friend; how to be strong for her, and how to close my eyes and not see his little body under the bed and hearing my friend's sobs as she knows her beloved kitty has moved on to the Rainbow Bridge?
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moon_beam
post Aug 15 2014, 04:38 PM
Post #2


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Posts: 8,088
Joined: 20-July 08
From: Virginia
Member No.: 4,861



Hi, baileysmama, please permit me to offer you and your friend my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Fred. As you know losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company.

The only advice I can offer with regard to your questions as to how to help your friend in her deep sorrow is to just be there for her - - listen each and every time she needs to talk to you about her grief, hold her hand, cry with her if you want / need to, and offer her comforting reassurance that she WILL endure through her deepest sorrow.

As for your needs in coping with this sorrow, certainly losing your beloved Fred will most certainly reignite the deep sorrow you have been coping with in the physical loss of your beloved Bailey. So please let me try to reassure you that what you are feeling is also very normal.

Baileysmama, thank you for sharing the loss of your and your friend's beloved Fred. Please know you and your friend are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how your friend, and you, are doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam


--------------------
In heaven's perfect garden there is no grief or pain, and all of God's creation join the angels' sweet refrain.

The most blessed way I have of knowing God's comforting love and grace is to look into the eyes and heart of God's creatures' sweet angelic face.
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Princessmommy
post Aug 15 2014, 08:08 PM
Post #3





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 59
Joined: 13-August 14
From: Joliet iL
Member No.: 8,392



Hello Bailey,

I don't know what to say since my loss is still so fresh so I completely understand your friend and how she is feeling now. All I can just tell you to do is be there for your friend as much as possible. Offer her all of your support because trust me when we happen to loss a pet that very instant we are in shock and completely devastated that all we want to do is cry and we feel that our whole world is over. Just offer to listen to anything she has to say let her know that you are there for her whenever she needs you to be. Your a good friend an that shows that you have a huge heart and that you care for her. thanks for sharing her story with us and please accept my most sincere sympathy and let your friend know that she will be in my thoughts and prayers and I will be thinking of her tonight.

((((Hugs)))))

Mayra
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