To All

To all..
I have only been here a few weeks, and not quite sure what happened. The posts i read the nite of my baby's passing were compassionate and sweet and nuturing from all. I can only say that in life we come up against many who are hurtful and cruel. If we give up and allow them to hurt us, we give them the power to continue to do so to other people. People who hurt others for their own reasons do not deserve one ounce of our energy, and i would not have even taken the time of day to reply to any of the bad things. If we give in to that, THEY WIN !!!! Our grieving processes are all different yet similar, and how we choose to do things is none of anyones business to criticize. Some people think i'm crazy to have spent alot of money on an urn for my sheeba, and have made comments like, "It was just a dog", but i dont take that to heart, because it is not their life and I have hurt no one by the choices i have made. None of us our perfect and there is no handbook on how to tell us how to handle this, so no one is wrong in however they handle the loss of a pet. It angers me that people feel the need to "judge". No one has the right to do that, because we are all different and have the right to do what we feel is best for our own lives. I am saddened by all of this, but will not leave the forum because of a few, when there are so many that are wonderful. I"m here to stay and i hope the rest of you will stay here to help the good people who really need us.
Dawn

Keeping My Other One Happy

I lost my one baby last week, and her partner patches is feeling the grief much like i am.. she didnt eat for two days... i have been feeding her toast to keep her going, because she cant seem to keep down solid food.. She is laying on Sandys blanket and is generally depressed.. I took her for car rides, and am paying special attention to her. I know time will help, but of course i'm worried. Can anyone share some helpful things to do to keep the pets who are left after a death happy and healthy..?? I am trying to keep the family and my other furry friends from getting too depressed, its kinda hard when i'm walking around the house myself crying..I am awaiting the vet to call to say that Sandys ashes are there and i can put her next to my other baby Sheeba, on a shelf that i have dedicated to her, with pictures and favorite toys..I know picking up her ashes is going to just start the pain all over again. This is just the hardest thing and I"m trying to keep us all from falling apart.

The Loss Of My Baby

Last week i was faced with the hardest decison. I had taken Sandy repeatedly to the vet, set in my mind that this was it, but i kept fighting. Sandy had a chronic illness, and at 1 year of age, she was suppossed to be put to sleep. I refused to give up and came home and did my research. I went back to the vet and had him order treatment from Purdue University. It was a last hope. The medicine was so strong, it could have killed her and i sat up all nite with her after each treatment. The next six years we battled it back and forth, every time she became worse, i was sure it was the end. Maybe i kept her around for my own selfish reasons. I layed with her on the bed on Tuesday nite, asking God to give me a sign, because she was getting really bad. She had developed sores from the illness, and when she rolled over she left huge spots of blood. I knew this was the sign. I scratched her belly in places she wasn't hurting, i got up and cooked her a wonderul meal, and spent the rest of the nite doing her favorite things... On Wednesay, i said goodbye. Still battling with myself whether she still had some life in her, and if i was making the right decision. I have always had rescue animals, a sharpei that was blind, that lived with us for 10 years, and a cat that was abused and crossed eyed, and a broken tail I was the one keeping animals alive, how could i now be taking one's life away. It just about killed me to make the decision, and i havent stopped crying since. I feel just terrible, and am trying any way just to make it threw this. I miss her so much... and i feel so guilty, did i do too much, did i not do enough.. I hope someone out there can share with me something to help me through this.