I Lost My Pretty Girl

I'm new here and so glad I found this forum. I have been reading the posts since yesterday and I'm not feeling so alone anymore. I lost my 16 and a half year old kitty, Angel, on Sunday. She had been diagnosed with hyper-thyroid about two years ago and our vet had put her on transdermal methimazol because the pills had her very sick. She did so well untill maybe two months ago on the transdermal. Her coat was looking georgeous and she had gained a little bit of weight. At the beginning of the summer she was starting to eat a lot more again and she was yelling at us A LOT. Angel had always been a talker so I thought maybe since she's getting so old she's just becoming ornery. LOL. She started to get lazier and her coat started getting knots again a few weeks ago. I'm pregnant, due in November and over the past month or so I've just had the feeling that my girl was not gonna make it until November. Well, on Sunday we came home and she seemed ok. She jumped onto the couch to be near me and she fell over, almost like her hind quarters were paralyzed. I got up and tried to get her to stand and she just couldn't. I started to cry instantly, called my husband in and he was trying to get her to move around. All she did was lay there and look at us. She just didn't look right. I picked her up and she was purring. There I am crying my eyes out, after all this couldn't be good! Hubby starts searching for an emergency vet hospital to take her to because it being Sunday our vet was closed. We found a place and drove her there. The whole way there she didn't make a peep and that's when I KNEW we were in trouble. She is NEVER quiet in the car. The vet took her in right away and there was very bad news. The vet told us she had ulcers under her tongue and that is tell tale sign of kidney failure, she also heard a heart murmur and thought that since she was so confused and couldn't walk that she may have a brain tumor or something to that effect. She said due to the heart murmur she was not sure how much testing or treatment or surgery Angel could survive but that she would definately try and treat her if we so chose to take that route. She said our other option would be to say goodbye to our pretty girl and that if we chose to do that she wouldn't say we were making the wrong choice. She had deteriorated so much just since she had jumped on the couch, now she was just laying there, barely moving... there was just nothing left of my girl. We decided to let her go, I felt it was the kindest thing to do for her. I didn't want to torture her, I didn't want her to be suffereing just so I could keep her around a little longer. That was the hardest decision of my life. We sat with her and petted her, kissed her, talked to her and said goodbye. I cried all night and all the next day... and the next day I cried a bunch... I never thought there were so many tears in me! Angel was my girl since I was 16 years old... half my life. She's been everywhere with me, through everything and I just kept thinking, "she's been there for every big life event... but she's not going to meet my first baby." I have two younger boy cats at home and I love them so much but life is just not the same without my Angel.