First Winnie, Now Hugo.

This time last year my 14 year old dog Winnie was diagnosed with Cancer and died in October. Last night my 12 year old cat Hugo was diagnosed with intestinal lymphoma (after being treated for irritable bowel syndrome for over a year) and has been given anywhere from a few weeks to a few months to live. How crappy is that?! I just lost Winnie and now my little cat has to go too. Worse, this type of cancer will eventually clog up his lower intestine so that waste will no longer pass waste and nutrients will no longer be absorbed - in short I get to watch my kitty starve to death. My vet is giving him prednisone to shrink the swelling in his intestine and jump start his appetite a bit, so that he can eat and keep down his food at least for awhile. This is so depressing you guys and i'm wondering where I am going to find the strength to do this all over again. My best friend and I jokingly nicknamed Hugo "the boyfriend" because he has this tractor beam of love stare. How i'm going to miss him! He is such a good cat, just sweet and affectionate, never into hunting to doing "bad cat" things. Any advice you guys can offer to help make his remaining days more comfortable, let me know. Have any of you had experience with this type of cancer? Do you know if it's painful (forgot to ask my vet that, will have to call him). Thanks again for letting me fall back on you guys. I'm just sorry we all get together under dire cir%%stances. Best to all of you who have lost their friends or who have friends who are dying.

How To Upload Pic?

Hi, I've been trying to upload a picture of my doggie as my avatar. I've use jpg, jpeg, png, and pict file formats and ensure that the size is no larger than 128 x 128 pixels, but I always get the same error message: "Sorry, you are not allowed to upload that type of image". What am I doing wrong?

Thanks!
Kelly

Winnie Died Yesterday

My dog of 14 years Winnie died yesterday. She had cancer of the spleen and congestive heart failure. The two of those conditions combined caused fluid to collect in her abdomen which I took her to have removed about every two weeks. I have written before on alt.grief.petloss about knowing it when it would be time to put her down everyone told me I would just know. Yesterday I knew. I took her to the vet for her usual fluid removal, which always makes her feel better. When I picked her up she was happy and energetic. I brought her home, she had some water and a little food. I put dinner in the oven. I was in the shower when Winnie came and got me. She couldn't stand up, she kept falling over as she walked. I jumped out of the shower, got her to lay down and checked her gums, they were white. I called the vet and said that we were coming back that something was wrong. I had to climb back in the shower to wash the soap out of my hair, and then hurry and get dressed, it seemed like it took forever! Oddly I remembered to turn off the oven before I carried my Miss Winnie to the car. I was afraid she would die before we made it to the vet. She didn't, and managed to jump out of the car, but then was too weak to walk, so I carried her into the vet. He checked her abdomen to see if there was fluid or blood collecting in it, it was blood. In then tested her blood for red cell count, it was very low, meaning that her spleenaic tumor had ruptured and was hemorraghing. He said that it might stop and that she would be very weak for a few days and then get better, or he said the bleeding could continue and she would die in a few hours from blood loss. The whole time Winnie just lay there, not even flinching or moving as the doctor examined her, she wasn't looking at me but past me and I knew that she was ready to go. I few days before I had asked my best friend to ask her grandmother, who had died 10 years ago at the age of 103 and who was an inveterate dog lover, if she would meet Winnie on the other side so that she wouldn't be afraid and so that she wouldn't look for me (Winnie was my shadow, if I was in the other room she would come and look for me, she always looked for me, she always had to be where I was). I think that my bestfriends grandma Edna was there and my bestfriends dog Athena who died last year was there too. Winnie and Athena were pals. I think they came to get Miss Winnie. I told the vet that I thought she was ready to go, he agreed with me. I stayed there with her, my face next to hers, I told her I loved her, that I was sorry, and not to be afraid. I thanked her for being such a good dog and to go with Edna and Athena. I heard her last breaths and only stayed for a bit after she was gone, because she was so obviously gone. I had to make it home before I could get hysterical, which I did. I came home and listened to her favorite music, Chopin's sonatas, and cried and cried until I fell asleep crying. I spoke with my best friend, and my parents and my neighbor, all the people who loved my Winnie. That helped. This morning I walked my other dog, Woshdee, alone, without his companion of 10 years. It was awful, but I knew that he needs me to be strong for him now, and tried to make our walk as fun as possible. I just really miss her. I don't want her to come back and visit me, her whole life was about me, her afterlife shouldn't be. I want her to go with Edna and Athena and be happy without me. I know I will see her again someday, in the meantime I don't want her looking for me, I just want her to be content where she is. Despite the fact that I have other pets, her absence is keenly noticeable, there is a palpable lack of her presence and I miss her. Wherever she is, I want her to know that I love her, I miss her and that i'm sorry.