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patricia
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Joined: 8-March 09
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patricia

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13 Jul 2009
This is my Sammie Girl who will never be forgotten but forever missed and loved:
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13 Jul 2009
This is my Sammie Girl who will never be forgotten but forever missed and loved:
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10 Jul 2009
melanie, please indtroduce us
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7 Apr 2009
it's been a while since ive posted. my life has been slightly chaotic ever since my little lucy has come into my life. she came exactly one week after fred got sick. i didnt want her at first but how can we say no to any furry creature that needs a home. shes a little terrier (or as i prefer to call her: a terror) mix and shes about 7 1/2 months old now. she was rescued from a kill shelter in LA, at about 4 months, and then the new owner decided that it was too much for him so he released her into the streets. her foster family found her laying by the side of the road as she'd been hit by a car. they rushed her to er and paid for all her medical/surgical bills. when she was finally ok to go home, her foster family found her owner. i guess he felt remorse and posted missing signs everywhere. they met with him and asked him to help with half of the payments and he refused and in fact rejected her again, saying he was single and didnt have time to care for her. her foster parents took her in but unfortunately could not keep her. my fred sent her my way and now shes found her forever home. it wasnt easy. the first day i cried and cried because i missed my fred so much. and i was angry! how could i take in a dog so soon afer my little cat had died? but this was all part of freds master plan. it came to a point where i called some friends and confessed that i would not be able to keep her. that was the pivotal moment: because i remember lucy looking at me with her beautiful sad eyes begging me not to give her away again. at that exact moment, i knew that i couldnt do that to her and i would have to make it work. it didnt take long for me to fall absolutely head over heels in love with her. missing fred? its still not easy. i come to work and turn on my computer to freds sweet little face and i will just lose it. or i listen to one of his songs and i sob. i dont know when that pain will go away. but i do know that as the clock tics daily, i look forward to getting home because i know my little lucy goosey is waiting for me. she loves to go on her walks, just me and her. and she loves coming back home and turning into what i call "lucy-fur" where her eyeballs start spinning and she goes a little crazy. then she settles down right next to me, hopefully i will have treats for her, and falls asleep. i have to wake her in order to go outside one last time and then she runs into her crate for the night. well, she runs because she always has a little cookie in there waiting for her. i love waking up in the middle of the night to hear her little snoring. and in the morning? well its hard for me no to open her crate door immediately. i think im more excited to see her than she is to see me. shes my little monkey. people tell me that little rescue animals know they are rescued and are doubly grateful to be with us. but i say, im the one thats grateful…to have her in my life. she makes me laugh again, and smile and when she wraps her little paws around my neck and lays her little head on my shoulder, or tries to eat my earring, well, i couldnt ask for more. my wonderful fred: i love you so much and i will never never never forget you. thank you for giving me lucy. she will never replace you but she makes me happy again just like you always did my little sweet. momma loves you forever!
9 Mar 2009
hi - im new to this site. i was wandering rather aimlessly yesterday trying to find a way to fill the emptiness and i found this website.

yesterday at around 10 am, i lost my beautiful little fred. ive had him for about 14 years. i had been looking for a little black cat and went to a humane society and was about to step in when a woman holding little fred, sobbing her eyes out, asked me if i was looking for a kitten. i hesitantly said yes because this was a little copper tabby, no bigger than the size of my fist. his huge green eyes stared at me. she begged me to take him, otherwise she would have to drop him off at the shelter. i really wanted a black cat, but how could i say no to a little kitten that needed a home. so i took him home with me. funny thing, about 3 months later i rescued a little black cat from the streets and he came home to become freds little brother; riley.

fred was momma's little angel. i didnt realize that until about 3 years ago when i went in for outpatient surgery and ended up staying for five days in the hospital. i attempted to call friends to go look in on my little ones but was so groggy and out of it that no one understood. when i was dropped off at my apt five days later, i was expecting to see two starving cats but instead they looked at me like, its ok mom, you always leave enough anyways. we just want you home. and during my recovery process which took about a month, fred never left my side. he was my little shadow. if i was in bed, he was in bed. if i attempted to walk somewhere, he was right behind me. when riley passed away, fred was there again. although he was grieving himself, he made sure he lay close to his momma.

a few months ago, fred was diagnosed with diabetes and although it killed me at first to inject him, he didnt mind at all. especially when he knew he was going to get his favorite treats right after. this past monday, after months of trying to get him regulated with different insulins, different units of insulin, i received a call that made me so happy. the insulin was working and it seemed like fred was in remission. so i was to stop the insulin immediately. he was fine until thursday. when i got home late from work, he had vomited the water that he'd been drinking. i wasn't sure what was happening. when he jumped on the bathroom sink he fell backwards (i was a little worried but then not because fred had only "learned" to jump less than a year ago). he was not a jumper at all. and during his "training" he had fallen a few times. that hadnt stopped him though. so i figured he hadnt timed it right. i kept an eye on him all thru the night. and at around 3am i noticed when he walked he stumbled. thats when i knew it was complications from the diabetes. i regretfully thought if we could wait it out a few more hours till his hospital opened, he would be ok. so i made him come to me and petted him and coaxed him to go to sleep but he didnt lie down like he normally does. he was fidgity and sat on the bed. at 730 fred and i were the first ones at the hospital. they took him in immediately and the dr came out a while later to tell me that fred was really sick but that he thought they could fix him although it would be about a week in the hospital and very costly. not caring i signed my life away. as long as my little "fwed" was ok. that night after work i visited him and he wasnt the same cat i had brought in. he couldnt hold his head up and would barely keep his eyes open. saturday, i was the first one there to visit fred and they gave me the wonderful news that his "numbers" were on their way up and he was feeling better. i held him and he responded to my voice. he would try and wiggle out of my arms (great sign as he hated to be cuddled. i did it all the time anyways) but saturday nite was a different story. he had crashed again and was worse than ever. the staff at the hospital was great. they allowed me to visit him in his cage. where i sat for as long as i wanted and talked to him and sang to him. later that nite, the emergency dr on staff called me to tell me his kidneys had begun to shut down and there was no hope. i rushed over again and held him and begged him to hang on for one more day. i wanted the loving drs that he knew to help him go and not an er dr that didnt know him. he did and sunday morning i rushed over and held him and sang to him as they administered the first of two shots. they wanted to make him go to sleep first so he wouldnt feel a thing. as they left him with me while the sleep medication kicked in, i talked to him and cuddled him and gave him hundreds of little kisses (he especially hated that) on his head. i stroked him and told him how much i loved him. and then i heard him take one last breathe and he was gone. my sweet boy, my angel from up above is gone. how do i go on? the hurt is so intense. the apartment is empty. my heart has a giant hole; one that is twice the size since riley passed last year. i miss my sweet boy waking me up at 630 for his insulin shot. i miss fred jumping on me while i watch tv. i miss fwed watching the dog whisperer with me. i miss his welcome home half meow every nite. i miss his soft fur as he would put his little face on mine. i miss trying to trim his nails as he howled and cried. i miss buying him toys that he played with for fifteen minutes and left. i miss him sleeping on the corner of my bed every nite. i miss him getting under the covers for a few minutes only because he knew mom felt better that he was warm. i miss him sleeping right in front of my little space heater. i miss my little boy so much.
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