It's been two years since I lost my girl dog, Bobo. I still take time from school on hard days when I think about her, and think about her every day. I find it hard to reconcile my dreams about her because they range from wonderful, to bitter, to absolute nightmares. I dream about her weekly still. Although it's a little easier now, I have been going through a particularly bad hump of sadness the last few weeks. I know I should take these dreams as a comfort. Seeing her in all her messy haired joy is a wonderful thing, but there are always sorrows with it.

The most constant of the dreams is basically being a ghost. No one in my family can see her but me. I can pet her, love her and give her attention. But she can never leave my mother's house. In the dream she said last night that she didn't understand why no one payed any attention to her when I was gone. No one else knew she was still there, and it broke my hear to tell her she was gone. She was sad she couldn't follow me because she would be lonely,and I was sad I always had to leave her knowing how lonely she would be.

Even when she's aware that she's no longer here in the dreams, it seems like she struggles to stay. It's not an easy thing for me to see in my dreams. I would rather she be happy, and visiting, but not merely upset about her lot and stuck. I can't seem to reconcile what this means to me. My desire to have her here coming up in an add way? Sometimes in the dreams she is sad because she can't leave the house because my mother buried her there, instead of respecting my wishes and letting me handle everything regarding my dog. I know I'm still unresolved as to how my mother handled things. I am still in college and the longer drive was just long enough for her to disrespect my wishes. I also don't believe she's actually still here in limbo.

After those dreams I feel really torn and unsure on how to feel better, what to tell myself to make me feel better.


I'm not sure what I was trying to get at with this post. I know most of us dream of our pets in many different ways. Some find comfort, some find nightmares, some find a little bit of everything.

I know I would rather dream about her in a confusing, if not sad fashion, than not at all. I try to take them at face value and just tell myself it's nice to see her, even if the situation is not always free from pain or confusion.

Hiya--

Dreams can be very bewildering, can't they? So complex, and sometimes repetitious, and hypnotic, and strange. I don't think that I have ever once dreamed about my four-leggeds, even though they have been a HUGE part of my life--that's why it's hard for me to respond to you. I dream about empty houses, lost rental cars, men I've never been with, huge places that I have to empty out...(I lost everything I owned about four years ago, so the dreams make sense, in a way.)

I WOULD try to be glad that Bobo is coming back to you, even if the "format" isn't what you'd most want. I think a pure message is coming through: "Mommy, remember me," even if the details around it are bizarre. Most dreams are--our unconsciousness'es unloading the imagery of the day, the week, the year. There's no logic to the places that sleeping takes us, or so it seems. We see a few raindrops on the windshield, and that night, as we sleep, we find ourselves in a tornado or a hurricane or an earthquake. It's all so strange!

I think that it is very dear that Bobo is appearing for you so consistently. Try some "conscious dreaming," where you spend time before falling asleep designating what kinds of dreams you might have. It doesn't always work, but when it does, it's very powerful.

I honestly don't know what else to tell you, and I'm a psychotherapist. Dreams have always confounded me--I've never been able to figure out if they really mean anything or not!

Meanwhile, enjoy your happy memories of Bobo!

Big Hugs--Margi and Ladywolf (who is dying of cancer)

Dreams of a lost pet can be good and bad. I've had good dreams of my cat Friend where we're just hanging out having a grand ole' time and, I’ve had others where I relive the night he passed. I question why I have the bad dreams (and sometimes the good ones too) because it's just so hard for me when I wake up. Dreams can be very confusing and I think that sometimes our pets come to visit us and get mixed into dreams of subconscious thoughts or goings on of our day to day life. Like Margi I believe you should be glad that you do get to see Bobo in your dreams. Personally having dreams about my last night with Friend are painful, but in a way I feel good because I see myself taking care of him until the very end. Enjoy your time with Bobo and try to find something positive about your dreams with him. It'll hopefully bring you some piece of mind.

Dreams can certainly be confusing. I have had dreams about Brutus in the past, but I never remember anything about him specifially until last night. I'm not sure dreams mean anything other than what your subconscience is thinking when you bed down for the night...you know it has a mind of it's own.

I interpret your dream to mean that you still have unresolved issues with how your mother handled the passing of Bobo...you are still angry with her and I think you may be angry with yourself because you weren't there..Your Mom didn't comply with your wishes even though she meant best and it's haunting you....this is just me talking, I have no degree in psychology and I know absolutely nothing about anything. I do not think that Bobo is stuck in the house...Bobo is somewhere beautiful, where there are all the things she loved (except you) and she is happy...she is waiting for you patiently and will have tons of fun until you meet again. That's just my thought...I think you should talk to your Mom about your feelings and then let go...you need to move on from these feelings of Bobo being trapped ...because honestly she isn't, she is as free as can be. She sure is beautiful. I think you may have some guilt as we all do..and gosh guilt is terrible and manifests in so many ways...you shoud not feel guilty in anyway...you were a great friend to her and YOU WILL see each other again... I am positive of that.

...and Margi is right....good thoughts = good dreams.

Hugs to you and sweat dreams of Bobo,
Love,
Brutus' Mom