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Aero
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England
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Joined: 19-December 11
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Last Seen: 21st July 2012 - 06:21 AM
Local Time: Mar 29 2024, 07:29 AM
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Aero

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2 May 2012
I would first like to start by thanking Lightning-strike for creating a wonderful place, where I came across by chance last year on the 18th of May, whilst in deep grief looking for help and guidance after losing my baby girl. There are not many who understand what it is like losing a soul mate and it is very hard to open up to people as they don't understand. But here I found the help I needed. Thank you.
I would also like to thank all the grieving parents, who whilst in their deep grief can reach out to others. You have helped me no end but I've not been able to bring myself to join you untill today. So thank you.

It has been a Year today that I last saw my baby girl Aero. It has been the worst year of my life, she was my world. If I may I will tell you a bit about her. 17 years ago my husband (but not at the time) found a little stay pup at work she was about 3-4 months old. Well I'd never had a dog so I didn't know what to expect! My husband is an aerospace engineer and at that time he worked at a place called pendle aeroform so he didn't want to call her form, hence the name Aero! And she lived up to the name as here in England we have chocolate bars called aero and they advertise as bubbly chocolate! We would always have to tell people she is called after aeroplane not chocolate!
When we first took her to the vets I couldnt believe they said she had a heart murmur I was devastated. But you wouldn't have thought! All through her life she was crazy! Really hyperactive.
I never went anywhere without her, I only left her twice in over 16 years (apart from the dreaded night she went into hospital) firstly to get married and secondly to have my daughter. And people would say when I was pregnant she would get jelous but she never did. She loved her little sister, never once snapped or snarled at her she loved her to bits. She would always want and wait to pick her up from school! My daughters first word was Aero! Then last year She became poorly I'd taken her to the vets loads of times but they never got to the bottom of it, the only time the vets were good is when she was dying. My baby collapsed on a Saturday night and we rushed her in, they did test nd said she was aniemc and dehydrated so to keep her in, the day after they phoned to say that they'd done more test and that she had a tumor on her spline and it was one of the worst kind and she was too old and poorly to operate. We went to get her to spend some time with her at home, to spoil her and take her to one of her favourite places but she was in so much pain. She wouldnt eat her favourate chicken and couldn't move. So on the Monday 2nd of may 2011 we had to let her go. Her daddy had to take her, whist me and my daughter waited in the car. I felt I'd punished her enough by keep taking her to the vets and her daddy found her he should let her go.
I didn't take it well I just wanted to be with her. I got depression and the doctors recommend that I saw a bereavement councillor. I lost my job as they wouldn't give me time off, my own family didn't understand, so if it wasn't for here and a neighbour I don't know where I'd be.
I take her ashes to bed every night and I sleep with one of her cushions and blankets and my daughter sleeps with her cushion from what she had as a puppy and a sleeping bag she had on her bed. I always tell her I miss her and love her. And I've turned to being more spiritual, it took me a long time to accept she was an old lady but I now need to know if she is ok. That I feel is my closure.
I do apologise for my long post it's been so hard to let it all out
To all the mummy's and daddy's who are in so much pain, you will be ok it takes time I'm one year in and not fully recovered I don't think I ever will be, but I have come along way and you will to. Trust me.
Every one please take care

Aeros mummy
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