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SashaBear
54 years old
Female
Northern California
Born April-16-1970
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Joined: 12-April 09
Profile Views: 7,477*
Last Seen: 23rd April 2009 - 11:47 AM
Local Time: Apr 24 2024, 04:27 AM
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dianasmith49@msn.com
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13 Apr 2009
I wanted her to go in her sleep. I prayed I wouldn't have to make that decision. But she was too tough she fought so hard to stay with us because she knew we would be lost without her. That day came and we knew it was time. We laid in bed with her from 7am until 4pm watching the clock knowing we were spending our last hours with her. We snuggled her and told her we loved her a million times. I felt like I was dying. We don't have kids she was our child. Horrific is the only word I can think of that even comes close to describing what we had to do. She was so scared, all I could think of was her last thought on earth was that I took her to the bad place that she hated. Does she know I did this out of love? Please let her know that. I couldn't stand the thought of her suffering anymore. Does she know how much I love her and miss her? We held her until the end. It replays in my mind constantly like a movie. The vet saying "she's gone". The pain physically hurts.The house is so empty and quiet. I can barely function. Nothing matters, I feel like a zombie. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and my husband isn't there. We have her doggie bed next to ours on the floor. I find him laying there next to it crying. I don't know what I did to deserve her but I thank God everyday for our time together. An Angel like her comes around once in a lifetime if you are lucky. The years of joy and happiness she brought us is worth this pain. We will see her again someday I know she is waiting for us, our bond will never be broken. |
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