Found A Kitty --, Remind me what to do Options

[Moose Mom]

Kimberly

Great picture of Miss Sable. She is looking so good.

Merry Christmas to you.

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Got referred to a Craigslist ad for a missing Sara, with the picture below. I didn't even want to respond to the ad, I don't want to risk that it's her and I have to send her away. "Mine! She's mine now!"

But I did answer the ad, and am awaiting more pictures. My first thought is that Sara's face is more heart-shaped than Sable's; Sara's tail is fluffier and her fur is longer. Granted, Sable's malnutrition may have taken a lot out of her coat. But I don't think they're the same kitty. Dang, they do look a lot alike though... This is scary for me. ~Kimberly

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[Mink&WillowsMom]

PS: Sable isn't Sara. Sara had a missing canine tooth, so sure way to verify.

[boogi3]

YAY! I want her to stay with you!

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Oh THANK YOU, Boogi! That made me laugh!
Yes, I want her to stay with me too!!

She's starting to chase Luna, the only one she has to navigate dominance with. (She knows that Willow and Rohan are wussies and don't want to be top cat.) Luna won't care either, I don't think, but she's so dang friendly and playful, she's never had anything lash at her before. As Mamabear, I get mad at Sable, though I know these skirmishes are inevitable. I wonder if they save it for when I'm home, or if they do this when I'm gone, too? ~Kimberly

[boogi3]

waiting for an update.........................

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Funny, just an hour ago I started to post, then got distracted. Miss Sable is doing beautifully. When I found her she was 5 lb. 11 oz, now she's over 8 pounds. She hangs out in the middle of everyone, and sits comfortably within 3 feet of the others. Everybody is just slowly, slowly finding ease with each other. She's finally started grooming herself. And twice she's batted a paw like she wanted to play. Tonight, for the first time, she fell asleep on my lap. She likes to be carried around (she purrs), and twice before she's stayed on my lap for a few minutes when I sit down, but tonight she completely sank into my arms and fell asleep.

She's very sweet and open to affection, but I wonder if she was in a home where she was hit. When I reach toward her to pet her, she pulls her head away. If I touch her before she sees me, she jumps, although being lost could have brought that on. She's relaxing, bit by bit, her guard coming down. I'm sure her other home was loving also, because when I talk to her all low-voiced and murmuring, she gently head-butts me or licks my forehead.

I've had three queries for lost black cats, but all were definitively not her (based on markings and teeth).

PLEASE TAKE THIS TO HEART: to all of you who have lost animals out there, and never knew what happened to them, please know that there are times when they find their way into someone else's home and heart, to be loved and cuddled and cherished just as they were in your home. It happened here. ~Kimbermama

[LoveThem]

What a wonderful story you have going with the new baby. She sounds so sweet and loving. I did adopt a shelter boy (black cat also) the day after Christmas and had forgotten the many things they do as youngsters before they settle down as Senior Citizens. I put Lucky's pictures in the New Beginnings. Sounds like what you have going here also. Every baby that finds a home and love surely must have been guided by an angel.

Miss Sable's pictures are precious. That weight gain is wonderful. And, all the little things you mention going on between you and her are good to hear about.

It is the light of good news like this that helps dispel much of the darkness that sadness brings into our lives when we lost our precious ones. The stories of young babies can easily make us laugh while their pictures never fail to make us smile. It is good for us to do that.

How she came into your life is a miracle for her as well as for you. Looking forward to more updates on your little sweetheart!

[Mink&WillowsMom]

A HUGE FIRST for Miss Sable! Today, for the first time in the 7 weeks she's been here, she jumped up on the bed and fell asleep.

As with any family, who is allowed to sleep on the bed is the definition for who's in the inner sanctum -- who is family vs. visitor. I've set her on the bed a few times, letting her know it's okay, though she promptly jumped off. The other three sleep on the bed at night, especially since she's been here. (In a measure of solidarity, ownership, or increased security, I'm not sure.)

Last night I woke at 5:30a, to see her on the floor at the foot of the bed, with Luna, Rohan, and Willow awake, alert, and staring at her. Only the second or third time she's been in the bedroom at night, that I know of. She curled up behind the door for a while; the other three settled down.

So this morning, after we were all up, she hopped up on the bed, sat there for a long time (testing the waters), then curled up in the sun and fell sound asleep for a couple hours. Bless my other kitties for being so easy with letting her in! And bless her heart for slowly coming to trust us. I get the sense she still thinks of someplace else as 'home,' but is slowly accepting her new family. It'll be a while yet before we're all five on the bed at once, but how wonderful that will be. Although there are times, I must admit, when waking up pinned to the bed with sleeping cat bodies can be a bit of an adventure. ~Kimberly

[Mink&WillowsMom]

The settling-in process is going along ... slowly. The honeymoon is starting to end, as all of us, including me, are coming to grips that this is a permanent arrangement. She's been here 8 weeks. Now they're getting down to the work of negotiating rank and friendships.

Sable is cautious -- hasn't let down her fight-or-flight guard yet. That period of being lost must have been so hard on her, she must have had to really defend herself.
She's tough. When the others get too close to her, she lashes out without any hesitation or warning. Clearly it's because she launches into >>panic! protect myself!<< mode. But when she walks around, her tail is high with a little curl at the top -- very friendly body language. She's rubbing her facial pheromones on *everything:* "Mine!" "I belong here too?" "See? I'm nice, but I'm going to be top dog, too." At times she clearly approaches the other cats, so she's doing some of the work too. And just in the last couple of weeks she's started to groom herself. I'm still thinking of giving her a bath.

Right now I'm a little bit resentful of the changes this has brought to my home. No doubt mirroring my resentments over healing so slowly from my car accident injury. I'm impatient, wanting things to resolve into ease more quickly. The other night she sat by the back door, her request to go outside in a former life. So help me, I had this impulse to just open the door, and let her out into the night, rid of her. I suppose every parent has those feelings at times.

Minuses: - I'm always running out of food and litter -- haven't found the new buying rhythm yet.
- She's still peeing way too much -- something is up with kidneys. I was relishing a household of vibrant healthy kitties (after years of caring for CKF) and now that ease is gone. She's not in kidney failure, but something's amiss.
- Scooping is extra messy, because big chunks break off and fly everywhere. (I've just finished moving her box into the cat bathroom, which will be a big help.)
- There's tension in the house. (Easing in the right direction at least.)
- Cat hair EVERYWHERE. (Hair wrangling ideas welcome!)
- If her mama were to suddenly materialize, I'd be relieved.

Pluses: - the other three have bonded in a tight and easy way. Willow is completely at ease with both Rohan and Luna; all three play together sometimes.
- They all pass within 3-4 feet, and sit about that far apart too. Wary, but in relaxed postures.
- Rohan is starting to work his extraordinary magic on Sable. It's a beautiful thing to watch. He is Master at currying friendship.
- Luna is just curious, and wants to play. Hopefully she can teach Sable how -- she obviously did not live in a home with other kitties. Dogs, I wonder? Twitchit was the same way, he knew how to pounce, but it was aggressive, not that claws-in, batting, glint-in-the-eye way cat-buddies learn to tussle with each other. If Sable will let Luna teach her, then all four cats can play together.
- Nobody is displaying jealousy. I can cuddle all four without anyone getting upset. (When Rohan starts schmoozing Sable directly, Willow may have something to say.)

Now that the afterglow of RescuingSavingALife has faded, the reality of this still-a-stranger in our home is here. She's pleasant, wary, self-assured, generally peaceable, but holds back on approaching us much. Yet, anyway. She likes being carried, and will sit in my lap for a few minutes if I sit down with her, but isn't quite at ease enough to stay there long. A friend of mine makes flower essences for cats, and she's going to help us out. ~Kimbermama

[Sassy Girl]

Give it a couple of more weeks and she will be even more part of the family and show you her thanks for being her angle.

I have enjoy reading your story. My Sassy Girl has been missing and gives me hope that if she can not make it home that she is in home like yours.

Please keep us update on your new member of the family and how everyone is getting along.

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Yesterday *I think* I saw Sable trying to PLAY with Luna!! She chased her, and at first I thought it was an attack-flee thing, since it started with Luna hissing. But as they came around the corner, Sable's tail was straight up, and her ears were forward! Friendly postures, not aggressive ones. I was thrilled! Sable's been watching how Luna and Rohan play with each other, and I think she was trying to copy the behavior. Her gait was loping, not hunter-speed. Now for Luna to notice the difference and return the favor!

Here she is soaking up the sun. You can see her fur is still rumply, in need of Rohan's cat-washing service, if she'd just let him. (The weird line at her hips is a combination of the shade line and the missing fur from where the mats were cut off.)

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[Mink&WillowsMom]

And another view.... ~Kimberly

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[Mink&WillowsMom]

FINALLY bathed her. She was awesome, just patiently sat and let me shampoo her. I just got dressed into sweats, laid a towel down in the tub, and climbed in with her. I poured warm water from pitchers over her as she sat between my legs. Because I was totally committed to getting soaked, I just snuggled her up close to me and she just let me wash her. Near the end I got a low growl from her, but overall she was amazing. Now that she's dry (courtesy of the rug in front of the woodstove), I've been brushing her. My goodness she's silky soft!!! As soon as I have a picture, I'll post it. Tonight she sat on my lap a long time, and I swear I heard "ahhhhhhhhh..." ~Kimbermama

[LoveThem]

Loved the bath description! When my new one came home and smelled of the shelter, the vet suggested getting Cat Wipes at Petsmart. It is a way to wipe them off like a bath without water. It worked pretty good. You may want to think about getting some for the future...although you sounded like you did have fun sharing the tub with your little one!

The other way I used to semi-bathe my 3 kittens years ago was to get a handcloth washrag, soak it in water and squeeze out the excess. The cats would let me wipe them down. That's what I use now when Lucky needed some liquid medicine and what dripped onto his fur was sticky and sweet smelling. I always read how cats do not like water so I just thought around it but the way you just jumped in made me smile.

Looking forward to the picture.............

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Oh she's so soft! Her head had a gritty-powdery feel, and her neck & belly had a vague greasy-gummy feel. Now she's all silky. ~Kim

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[Moose Mom]

Oh Kim

She is such a beauty. What a great picture. Sounds like you guys had fun in the bath. Sometimes there really is nothing to do but give them a good bath. You guys are so lucky to have found each other.

Love

[LoveThem]

Beautiful picture! She has those "special" eyes.

[paris]

Kim,

It's amazing the transformation you've done on her!

[Mink&WillowsMom]

Okay, I'm taking a cue from the gent who wrote "Confession" (see Death and Dying), and Paris' reluctant disclosure about Bennett.

I've been struggling with feelings of not wanting Sable in my home.

Luna, Rohan, and Willow all guardedly walk past her, because she stares them down and lashes out sometimes. The warily pass by, tense and back stiff. There haven't been a lot of fistfights, but the honeymoon is definitely over, and sometimes Sable chases them, especially Luna, with lots of hissing and spitting. (Usually on Luna's part.)

Sable's kidneys are "weak." The doc says it's not kidney failure, but suggested I put her on the special NF diet as a protective measure. I'm just not willing to do that -- I've tried it with other cats and they all hate it. And with four, there'd be no way to switch just hers. I may as well just throw the money in the trash, because that's where all the food ends up. I'm willing to try other dietary changes, but not NF. She goes through an ungodly amount of kitty litter -- she pees as much as the other three combined. I'm awash in litter granules.

After years of caring for failing, elderly kitties, it was a joy to adopt new kittens. Willow, Rohan, and Luna are all abundantly healthy. What a relief of have a healthy, robust home. And after caring for my elderly, ailing father, and then to have been released from that when he died, I am SO unwilling to step back to caring for something in ill health. It's a stress that wears on me heavily. She doesn't groom herself well, she looks all rumply and unkempt. She's docile, and her mood is even, and purrs, and occasionally tries to play, but she's not robust. She now weighs 9 lbs, 1 oz (up from 5-10 when I found her).

But how can I ask someone else to adopt a health-compromised animal? I feel stuck with her. Maybe, with more time, she'll bond with some of us, but it hasn't happened yet. The local Kitten Rescue is just about to launch into kitten season, and if I insisted they take her, I think I'd ruin my goodwill with them (I used to volunteer there). One option, is they might be willing to advertise her on the website, as long as I continue to foster her.

I just feel like I'm a bad mom, and being selfish for wanting a home of harmony and health, needy kitties need not apply. ~Kimberly