Just Lost My Kitty Chloe, I have a few questions about something I experienced today Options

[Beth_P]

Hi everyone,
I just lost my Chloe this past Friday June 21st. She was almost 20 and my very best friend. She let me know she was ready and I got her to the vet and her passing was peaceful. I never possibly thought anything could hurt this bad.

The weekend was bad but today I felt a bit better so I went to the library as I needed to print some forms. I was fine until right when I finished. Then out of nowhere a particular memory from Friday hit me. And suddenly it felt like I was right back in that moment experiencing it for the first time. I started crying as discreetly as possible, put my sunglasses on so no one could see, and made it home where the crying and sadness were as bad as Friday. And then when I got my mail, there was a pet food coupon in it which absolutely killed me.

Has anyone else had that kind of thing happen while out in public? How did you handle it? And why do those memories just pop into my head without anything triggering them? It’s beyond horrifying. There are two specific memories in particular that I cannot get out of my head no matter what I do.

I also cannot stand to listen to any music that’s even remotely close to being sad. I had to mute my TV tonight at a car commercial because of the music. And the idea of looking at any photos of her is unbearable right now. I can’t look at her little paw prints from the vet either.

Is all this normal? This was my first pet on my own as opposed to a family pet. I live alone too. So her passing is having a major impact on my entire life. Sorry this is so long. I haven’t had anyone to talk to about this until now.