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> Jake's Story
Jake'sGrandpa
post Sep 25 2012, 10:28 AM
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We reluctantly agreed when my son, in college and still living at home, spoke of getting a dog, and not just any dog but, of all things, an English bulldog. We didn't think he was serious and soon forgot about it. Then, one day our lives changed when son showed up with the prettiest little white bulldog puppy, only three months old and already 16 lbs.! Son named him Jake and, of course, I became Jake's Grandpa. He soon took over the house and became our main focus. We all helped care for him and took him nearly everywhere. He was a most loving, gentle creature and stole our hearts completely. In time, Jake grew to 60 lbs., and was the picture of strength and health. Son got busier with school, work and a social life, and eventually I wound up spending more time with Jake than he did. Jake and I bonded and became soulmates. I fed him three times a day, took him for walks, to the park and to the veterinarian when necessary. A couple of years ago, I moved my office to a room in our house and Jake became my constant companion. While still very much a family dog, loved by us all and loving us all, he gravitated toward me, spending much of his time with me in the office. Then, one day in April 2011, not long after Jake's 6th birthday, he was lying under my desk when I noticed a small bump on the bottom of his left front paw. We saw the vet the next day and, two days later, she removed the bump and had it evaluated. We were crushed to learn that it was mast cell tumor, grade 3, a form of canine cancer which is almost always fatal, usually within 6 months to a year. We immediately began seeing an oncologist and put Jake on chemotherapy. He was tough and tolerated the side effects well, but after nearly a year, the tumor returned. We removed it again and prayed for the best, but eventually the mast cell spread to Jake's lymph gland. Although we had spared no effort or expense and did everything that we possibly could have done for Jake, our loving companion weakened quickly. On the morning of July 14, 2012, my greatest fear came to pass and we knew it was time to end his suffering. We called his kind and caring veterinarians and, with great difficulty, my wife, my son and I drove Jake to their office for the last time. We were with him when he peacefully took his last breath on this earth. Since then, life has been a struggle. I just can't get that sweet boy out of my mind and don't really want to. We have his ashes and his two favorite toys in the living room, his bed is still on the floor in its same place and his other toys are still here too. We can't even bear to empty his treat jar. I do feel like his spirit is with us, but miss him terribly every single day. I thank the Good Lord for our time together, but feel like I'll never be the same without him. No other dog could ever take his place. I don't even want another dog, I only want my Jakey back.

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LoveMyMickey
post Sep 25 2012, 06:28 PM
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Dear Jake's Grandpa,

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious granddog, Jake. He is so cute. I know what you mean about not wanting another dog. Our Mickey passed away 19 months ago and we still have one of his beds in our bedroom with toys. If I put everything away right now, I would feel like I am losing him all over again.

Again I'm sorry for your and your son's loss of Jake. I hope soon you can look back and smile at the cute and funny things he did. You all are in my thoughts and prayers....God bless,

LoveMyMickey


--------------------
"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."
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Bobbie
post Sep 25 2012, 09:43 PM
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Dear Jake's Grandpa,

I am so very sorry for your loss of Jake, the greatest of granddogs. Your words ring so true of the love the two of you shared while Jake was physically on this earth and continues to this day in the more Spirit realm. No, you will never be the same again, even if you would want that, because Jake helped shape you into the good person you are today. I'm sure that is one of Jake's proudest legacies: his Grandpa. Becoming a dog's soulmate is very, very special. My sister calls them Spirit Dogs, for their spirit (or soul) becomes one with your own and that never changes. See, Jake's Grandpa, Jake is still very much with you in a new and different way. Jake is right next to your heart, feeling every beat and loving its rhythm. Jake is with you always, wherever you go, wherever you are, you are not alone.

I know that it feels so lonely because of the familiarity of Jake's physical presence and actions and your response to them. That is so very difficult to deal with. Please don't feel like you have to change anything or anyone. Because you don't. Jake will gently guide you along this grief journey that is one of the hardest, bumpiest roads we'll ever walk. My Trevor has been gone for 14 months and I miss him more each day. He was the one dog, of the 8 I've lived with in my adult life, that has had the greatest effect on my life. I still have many things up and around of Trevor's that just may stay in place forever. Although I have gotten two "new" rescue Cocker Spaniels, one dog NEVER replaces another and should never be expected to do so.

Jake's Grandpa, please be kind to yourself and know that you do not have to do any of the "correct" things our society tells you to do when grieving. Each loss is unique and totally personal. Take all the time you need to remember, reflect, grieve, and thank Jake for coming into your life. Time. That, to me, is the greatest healer of all and it goes at only one speed.......your own. So, don't should on yourself when coming to Jake and his memory. Take all the time you need and do things that YOU want to do to honor Jake's life and your own. (Heck, I left my second dog's bed in the hallway for over a year before I could even THINK of moving it. I also kept water in their water bowl - changing it every day - for over 6 months after Rudy passed away.)

Jake sounds like quite a fella. When you feel ready, I know many of us on this site would love to hear more about him. And I can assure you that Jake has already made hundreds of friends in the Perfect World by now. Trevor and Mickey among the first. THANK YOU for sharing a bit of Jake's life with us today. You never need to worry about being alone - we are here 24/7 to listen, cry, laugh, sigh, understand, and support you when you need it the most. You won't find that on most other sites - not like here.

So, Jake's Grandpa, I'm going to say Good Night to you and to my Trevor. I hope you have a peace-filled night and I look forward to hearing from you again.

Blessings..............................................
Bobbie (Trevor's mom)
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Sep 27 2012, 07:06 AM
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Thank you so much for your kind words, LoveMyMickey and Bobbie. They are a comfort, especially today; it's my 63rd birthday, but I'm not feeling happy, just sorrowful at the loss of Jake and still missing him terribly. Thanks again for your kindness, and I hope that Jake and I can one day cross the Rainbow Bridge with both of you and your beloved Mickey and Trevor.
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missingmygranny
post Sep 27 2012, 06:14 PM
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Have you considered another puppy? I know it seems soon and it isn't to replace Jake but there is something about having a pet to care for and cherish that helps with the loss. YOu were obviously a wonderful and loving grandfather to him and remember that every day that you had with him was a blessing. So very sorry for the loss of your Jake!
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moon_beam
post Sep 28 2012, 10:02 AM
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Hi, Jake's Grandpa, please permit me to add my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Jake. Losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company. Euthanasia is the last gift of love we can give to our companions at great sacrifice to ourselves so that they can be restored to their former youthfulness in the company of the angels.

Jake, LoveMyMickey and Bobbie have so comfortingly shared many things that are in my heart as well, so please read their responses and know that my thoughts are also expressed with theirs.

As Bobbie has shared with you, one of the many painful adjustments we are faced with during our grief adjustment journey is coping with the physical absence of our beloved companions. We live in a physically oriented world governed by the 5 senses of taste, touch, sound, smell, and sight. Every time our companions touch us, rub up against, we touch them, they kiss us, they are literally imprinting themselves on us so that they can identify us out of all the millions of other people on this planet. When they precede us to the angels, our physical bodies literally go through a physical withdrawal from this imprinting, and this is one of the many reasons why this grief journey is so very painful - - both emotionally and physically. You may find it helpful to hold one of your beloved Jake's toys or blankets or collar - - something that belongs only to him - - when the emptiness of not being able to hold him and touch him is overwhelming. No, it isn't the same as holding and touching his physical body - - but it will help bridge the emptiness.

As for embracing a new companion into your heart and life, - - this is strictly a very personal decision. Some people adopt quickly after a loss because a new life to care for helps them cope with their deep sorrow. Some people wait until their deep sorrow has eased and they feel they are ready to embrace a new companion. Some people do foster and rescue care until the homeless waifs are able to find a new Forever Home. Some people do "nanny sitting" for precious companions for family member and friends. And some people - - for whatever reason - - never adopt another companion. Only YOU know what is best for you, Jake's Grandpa. Whatever YOU decide - - at any point in time - - is the RIGHT decision for YOU.

I know there are no adequate words in any language that can soothe the seering pain of sorrow that is in your heart. I can only hope the words I share with you will offer you some measure of comfort, support, encouragement and hope as you travel your grief adjustment journey - - with the comfort of knowing that the love bond you and your beloved Jake share is eternal - - it is not restricted to the physical laws of time and space. Your beloved Jake's sweet Living Spirit is forever a heartbeat close to you.

Thank you so much for sharing your beloved Jake with us, Jake's Grandpa, and thank you so much for sharing his sweet picture with us. Please know you are among friends here who truly do understand what you are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Jake's Grandpa, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam


--------------------
In heaven's perfect garden there is no grief or pain, and all of God's creation join the angels' sweet refrain.

The most blessed way I have of knowing God's comforting love and grace is to look into the eyes and heart of God's creatures' sweet angelic face.
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My Doxie and Me
post Oct 1 2012, 12:38 AM
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To a friend as we look into the distance to catch a glimps of are friend as if we see them laying in there bed
as time slows we reach for a moment that we share with just 1 special friend as we hold there paw again
to look them in the eye as they wish us there final goodbye to let us know we did what was right as we hold
are heart against are faith as we kneel and wait.

Iam not sure what to say next other then i know how heavy your heart is as you look out the window
to see if your friend is waiting to come inside.....As we still fill the water dish in hopes they might sit by are side
we call there name and see each blade of grass dance beneath the sun that shines as we kneel to speak are words of past
to tell a friend how much we care and how much we hold them intime of need as we put are thoughts behind the ones
that need are help for this day we shine for a friend as we hold them tight and wish them well..

As we thank them for all the special times as they teach us we try and form words as we start to part are ways
we hold them with Honor as we kiss them and say goodnight as we save a place beside are Heart where they
sleep as covers seem to shrink and echos of Snoring giants ring through the Halls of time as we wake to see there
favorite towel that covers are pillow case as iam and will always be at your side as you try and move but my friend
it is night and i have pinned you in tight as know one can move or dare wake me while i sleep.. As sound comes from within;
Well lets just say the paint in the main bedroom still needs a fresh coat of paint;

As i wake from someone that snors like a giant i think to myself Someone needs to sleep on the couch;<Grandpas Mom>;
so i can get some much needed beauty sleep;Now my morning Breakfest as i kiss my dad to say......
as Mourning light fades and holds a special place we kneel and wait for are friends as Time Inprints over are Hearts
that we have given to are friend...As Echos of time we hear each Paw print that walks in are mind.

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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 1 2012, 08:59 AM
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To all my friends here, I thank you sincerely for the comfort and the solace that you have given me in this difficult time of my life. As you yourselves know all too well, nothing can erase my grief. However, you have helped soothe the deep aching I feel in my heart at the loss of sweet Jakey, for which I am most grateful to you. May we all be reunited with our loving and sorely missed companions one day at the Rainbow Bridge. I look forward to seeing you all, and your precious ones, there.
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Bobbie
post Oct 1 2012, 09:14 AM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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Dear Jake's Grandpa,

Please feel free to stop here any and every time you feel like it. The memories of our loved companions NEVER fades and, many times, needs to be told so that others can share some of the love you have for Jake.

Call on me, any time, day or night. I'm ready to listen, read, cry, laugh, sigh and even just sit...........

Have a wonder-filled day of good memories of Mr. Jake!!

Blessings..............................
XOBobbieXO
Trevor's mom
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 1 2012, 01:31 PM
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Thanks, Bobbie, for your kindness. My best to you.
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moon_beam
post Oct 1 2012, 03:16 PM
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Hi, Jake's Grandpa, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Please know there are no strangers here - - for although we will probably never physically meet one another on this side of eternity we are united in a friendship that binds us together - - for it is our love of our beloved companions that brings us here and helps us forge enduring friendships. When we see each other in heaven's perfect garden there will be no need for introductions - - for we will already know each other.

Until then, Jake's Grandpa, please know we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. There are no expiration dates here - - you are always welcome to come share your beloved Jake with us.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Jake's Grandpa, and that you will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Jake's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing, and sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Jake.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam


--------------------
In heaven's perfect garden there is no grief or pain, and all of God's creation join the angels' sweet refrain.

The most blessed way I have of knowing God's comforting love and grace is to look into the eyes and heart of God's creatures' sweet angelic face.
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 1 2012, 04:27 PM
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moon_beam, your kind words are balm for my broken heart. Many thanks and my best to you.
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 14 2012, 03:38 PM
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Three months ago this very day we had to put down our precious Jake. I miss you so, Jakie.
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Bobbie
post Oct 14 2012, 08:15 PM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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Dear Jake's Grandpa,

I am so sorry that these days have to come and go all the time. You were the BEST of Grandpas and Jake knew that every minute. Please accept my sympathy and love on this 3 month Angelversary.

Blessings to you and Jake...............................
Bobbie
Trevor's mom
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 15 2012, 07:03 AM
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Thank you, Bobbie. My heart is aching today.
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My Doxie and Me
post Oct 21 2012, 10:43 PM
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Forgive me JG i thought you might enjoy this ..

Poem BaggyBulldogs

Now i lay me down to sleep;
The king-size bed is soft and deep.
I sleep right in the center groove
My human being can hardly move!

I've trapped his legs, He;s tucked in tight
And here is where I pass the night
No one disturbs me or dares intrude
Till morning comes and "I want food!"

I sneak up slowly to begin
my nibbles on my humans chin.
He wakes up quickly,
I have sharp teeth-
I'm a puppy,don't you see..
For the morning's here
and it's time to play
I always seem to get my way.

So thank you Lord for giving me
This Human person that i see.
The one who hugs and holds me tight
And shares his bed with me at night!
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 22 2012, 08:34 AM
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Thank you, My Doxie and Me. I'm feeling the pain again today and that poem cheered me up. It's funny and brings back many wonderful memories. My best to you, my friend.
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missingmygranny
post Oct 22 2012, 11:28 AM
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Group: Pet Lovers
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I am a mom to six - three beautiful children and three beautiful labs. Each of them holds a special place in my heart and all are unique and wonderful parts of my life. Our oldest lab, Harley, has failing health and I know her months are numbered. I will be crushed when the time comes as we got her when our family and our marriage was falling apart and she was part of what brought us back together. The love from a pet is unconditional and that's part of what makes being a pet owner something special and so heartbreaking when the time comes. My thoughts are with you!!
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Bobbie
post Oct 22 2012, 07:06 PM
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Dear Jake's Grandpa,

Oh, that has such a beautiful sound to it: "Jake's Grandpa". Most of us don't think about out baby's grandpas, but yours did and it is wonderful!

How are you doing right now? It's been close to 4 months? Right now I have trouble remembering much of anything, but I keep trying. Like you, I always remember the important stuff, like the last time Jake got in "trouble" and how he got out of it. Grandpa, you are doing a marvelous job handling your grief journey. It NEVER is easy, even though some days seem that way. Just keep Jake in your memories and things will work out as they should. None of us knows what that "should be" is for us, although we have ideas. Mr. Time will help work things out.

I never thought I would be able to write these words, after Trevor died, but here I am, 15 months later, remembering and feeling every single thing about that "day", but in a way that has some comfort for me. After all, Trevor is safe. He is pain free. He can see again. He can run and run and run. He can eat all that he wants. He had a million friends now. These type of thoughts push to the forefront of memories now and I am so grateful for that. It will happen for you, too, but you must give Time its due. Don't look for the changes. They will come and surprise you. That's the best part.

I must go and write to Trevor now. Jake's Grandpa.......have a blessed night.

XOXOxoxo
Bobbie
Trevor's mom
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Jake'sGrandpa
post Oct 25 2012, 07:13 AM
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Thank you, missingmygranny and Bobbie, for your kind thoughts and well wishes. It has been exactly 3 months, 1 week and 4 days since we lost Jake, and I miss him every day. Time is helping some, and the thought that we will one day be reunited. I hope that someday Jake and I can meet you at the Rainbow Bridge with your precious Harley and Trevor. Best to you both.
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