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ChrisL
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Portland, Oregon
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Joined: 26-June 11
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Last Seen: 8th July 2012 - 09:53 PM
Local Time: Jul 23 2019, 05:18 AM
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ChrisL

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15 Sep 2011
Hey guys, I thought all of you, especially anyone who has ever had a pet go missing, would get some hope from this news story about a far-wandering cat:

Colorado cat, missing 5 years, is found on NYC street

I suppose she went to follow her dream of starring on Broadway wink.gif

Peace,
Chris
24 Jul 2011


I found you pacing in a cage, eyes of magic topaz.
You found me looking for a simple heart impervious to my flaws.
We found this love that knows no human tongue –
Words too trifling to express it.

You lingered on through troubled days, the little liger by my side,
Fire spirit burning bright to light the course on stormy waters.
Wandering off to chase the moths and birds among the grass and weeds,
You never stayed to long afield before your journeys brought you home

Saying:
I command this love.
Be here right now.
Lie down beside me.
Stare straight through me to my core
The golden thread that locks our gaze,
In sacred knots to bind our pride.

For one last time the fire cat rejoins the flame that lit the glow
Behind his golden eyes.
The warmth within his lion heart reached to touch the golden sunlight
Of the early summer evening –
Then let his breath, his heat go out to fill the vacuum of the sky –
The boundless space, the resting place for restless travelers’ hearty spirits,
Out to stalk the setting sun with a final whispered wish:
“Remember.”

Dzambala
b. 3/2004
d. 6/25/2011




(Explanation of the Dzambala Thigle above: A bit of Dzambala's cremated remains are fused into the glass outlining the Tibetan character "dza", the first sound in his name and that of his namesake (the Tibetan wealth deity). I chose the colors to suggest a sunset or flame passing into evening sky in resonance with this poem)
23 Jul 2011
I'm starting a new topic to put my occasional updates on life with Loki, things that are not directly about Dzambala, but just Loki and me in this new stage of life.

Don't have a lot to say today. One of those lovely Northwest summer days that reminds me why I moved here. Tomorrow I'm going hiking to Ramona Falls on Mt. Hood, one I've been meaning to do for a couple years now.

I'm just going to start off by posting the pictures of Loki that went bye-bye with the server dump, followed by a few more new ones.



27 Jun 2011
For seven years, I knew love and affection, given without condition and without judgment. I have never been so deeply connected to another animal. When I went to bed, he followed me in. When I woke up, he followed me out. When I came home, he was waiting to run to me. When I sat in this chair, 9 times out of 10 he was in my lap. When I called his name, I heard the soft patter of his claws across the kitchen floor, and then he would greet me with his raspy "reh". This was Dzambala, aka Creamsickle the Elusive Liger, aka Zamba, Egg, etc. etc. (you know how us cat people are).



All of these moments are now gone from my days. I don't know when the ache in my core and my bones and the burning in my eyes will subside, but I will never forget him. He was only 7. I tried everything I could to turn his kidney disease around, to no avail. On two days before his passing, he brightened up and I felt real hope that he had turned a corner and that we would have more time, with a serious but manageable health condition.

But on Saturday, something was wrong. He was still loving and curled up in my lap and answering to his name. But he kept making trips to one litter box, then down the hall to the other one, and nothing was coming out. His bladder seemed normal sized when I felt his abdomen. But just after 4 he let out a quiet, low moan that was barely a whimper. He had been straining a lot for the last 6 weeks, but he was always quiet before. I thought maybe the pain medicine was constipating him. So I went to the store for some Miralax around 5:30, and returned a half hour later to find him stretched out limp inside the door, facing toward the sunlight.

Thanks to his vet, he was comfortable up until the very last hours, and I think he was in very little pain. His system was just stretched and strained, so he had stretched his long, elegant frame out one last time, and let go. After cradling his body, I wrapped him in a blanket and laid him back down where I had found him. While I changed the litter box and water for his brother, and took a drive to get a bag of ice, I let his brother Loki sniff and examine him. Then for one last time, I held his paw, now cold, and cried my eyes out, before covering his head with the blanket.

That first night was horrible. I had spent nearly all my extra income trying to turn his health around, so I to put him on ice in a cooler until the Humane Society cremation service opened up the next morning. I have cried more in the last two days than in the previous two years, at least. My first real feeling of serenity came when I picked up his ashes and placed them before the Buddha in my living room. At a time that I do not yet know, in a place yet to be determined, I will scatter his ashes. For now I am gathering up my pictures and I plan to go to a support group here in Portland the next time they meet. And I am keeping company with Loki, a gentle giant of a cat who I know senses the absence in his own way as much as I do.
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