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Kathy0309
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Kathy0309

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23 Jul 2018
I'm taking my precious kitty, Karma, to the vet today to join the angels.
For nearly ten years (I adopted him when he was about five) he has
brought nothing but joy to my life. He has been the most wonderful
pet anyone could ask for, cheering me and comforting me through
some very rough times.

He is right beside me as I type this. He has oral squamous cell carcinoma
and my husband and I took pictures this morning of the changes that
have occurred since his diagnosis about a month ago. We have
given him pain meds and steroids since then, but when the vet
got the new pictures we emailed her this morning, she said
Karma's jaw is starting to separate and that even the pain
meds will no longer help much. She said the photos showed
he is clearly in pain and that it can only get worse.

So my husband and I are taking him for euthanasia early
this evening for the vet's last appointment of the day.
This is so, so hard, because this cat and I are so very close.
Last night he slept curled up against my stomach, but
he woke me several times during the night by pawing
at me as if to ask me to do something.

Then this morning he ate some turkey baby food, but
didn't finish it. Until this morning his appetite has
been almost ravenous, but we can tell it's now
hard for him to eat. The change was literally overnight.

What's made this even tougher is that in every other
way, Karma is healthy and strong. Just last night
he jumped from the top of the sofa to the top
tier of the cat tree. He doesn't isolate himself even
today and has remained right at my side all
day. I'm finding this to be one of the hardest
things I've ever had to do...letting him go before
the suffering and pain get even worse. I'm doing
this for him, because to cling to him as long
as possible would only mean to see him continue
to suffer and possibly be in agony even with the
pain meds.

If any of you have been wrestling with this same
kind of decision, I would appreciate any support
and input you can give me. Chances are that
by the time you read this, Karma will be gone.
But I will still be here...and I came to this forum
because I know my grief will be terrible for
a while and that others have been through this
and perhaps can support my decision
(along with the vet's) to take a chance
on doing this a few days too soon rather
than even a day too late.

Thanks in advance....I'm heartbroken
and I'm already grieving, tears
pouring down my cheeks, because in just
two hours, my beautiful pet who is
even now right beside me will be gone from
me forever. He's been the dearest, sweetest,
most wonderful pet anyone could hope for.
I will miss him so, so much.

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Lo-Fi Version Time is now: 19th July 2019 - 01:49 AM